Goat Simulator is the latest in goat simulation technology, bringing next-gen goat simulation to YOU. You no longer have to fantasize about being a goat, your dreams have finally come true! WASD to write history.
User reviews: Very Positive (19,230 reviews)
Release Date: Apr 1, 2014

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Recommended By Curators

"Can't wait for Goat Simulator 2016..."
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Recent updates View all (6)

September 26

Mac/Linux Patch 1.1.29475

  • (Mac)Special characters in the steam profile name no longer cause a black screen with the beach-ball of death.
  • Gamepad support fixed.
  • (Mac)The mouse is captured correctly at startup.
  • The mouse is contained within the screens boundaries.
  • Reset keybindings now works.
  • You can now get the Involuntary QA achievement if the game crashes!
  • The Flappy Goat's hitbox is unchanged.
Enjoy!

43 comments Read more

June 26

Mac and Linux versions now available!

Hey goats! The long awaited Mac and Linux ports are now finally availalble for everyone to enjoy. We've been working long and hard to make them happen, but now they're finally here.

The ports might still have a few issues but we will work hard to fix them asap. Please file any issues on the Steam forum or directly to our porter Ryan Gordon (@icculus) at his bugzilla.

276 comments Read more

About This Game

Goat Simulator is the latest in goat simulation technology, bringing next-gen goat simulation to YOU. You no longer have to fantasize about being a goat, your dreams have finally come true! WASD to write history.

Gameplay-wise, Goat Simulator is all about causing as much destruction as you possibly can as a goat. It has been compared to an old-school skating game, except instead of being a skater, you're a goat, and instead of doing tricks, you wreck stuff. Destroy things with style, such as doing a backflip while headbutting a bucket through a window, and you'll earn even more points! Or you could just give Steam Workshop a spin and create your own goats, levels, missions, and more! When it comes to goats, not even the sky is the limit, as you can probably just bug through it and crash the game.

Disclaimer: Goat Simulator is a completely stupid game and, to be honest, you should probably spend your money on something else, such as a hula hoop, a pile of bricks, or maybe pool your money together with your friends and buy a real goat.

Key Features


  • You can be a goat
  • Get points for wrecking stuff - brag to your friends that you're the alpha goat
  • Steam Workshop support - make your own goats, levels, missions, game modes, and more!
  • MILLIONS OF BUGS! We're only eliminating the crash-bugs, everything else is hilarious and we're keeping it
  • In-game physics that spazz out all the time
  • Seriously look at that goat's neck
  • You can be a goat

Mac and Linux Disclaimer

The Mac and Linux ports are still in Beta. Expect problems. We're working on fixing them asap!

System Requirements

PC
Mac
Linux
    Minimum:
    • OS: Windows Vista (SP2), Windows 7, Windows 8
    • Processor: Intel Core 2 Duo, AMD Athlon X2, or equal at 2.0 GHz
    • Memory: 2 GB RAM
    • Graphics: DirectX 9.0c-compatible, SM 3.0-compatible, 256MB VRAM
    • DirectX: Version 9.0c
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Sound Card: DirectX 9.0c-compatible, 16-bit
    Recommended:
    • OS: Windows 7 or Windows 8
    • Processor: QuadCore 2.0 GHz +
    • Memory: 4 GB RAM
    • Graphics: DirectX 9.0c-compatible, SM 3.0-compatible, 512MB VRAM+; NVIDIA GeForce 8800 GTS or better
    • DirectX: Version 9.0c
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Sound Card: DirectX 9.0c-compatible, 16-bit
    Minimum:
    • OS: OS X version 10.7 or later
    • Processor: 1,4 GHz Intel i5, 2.0 GHz Intel Dual Core or better
    • Memory: 4 GB RAM
    • Graphics: Intel HD Graphics 4000 or better
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Additional Notes: MacBook Pro 2011, iMac 2011, MacBook Air 2012
    Recommended:
    • OS: OS X version 10.8 or later
    • Processor: 2 GHz Intel i5/i7 or better
    • Memory: 4 GB RAM
    • Graphics: Intel HD Graphics 5000 or better
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Additional Notes: 2013 models or better
    Minimum:
    • OS: Ubuntu 12.04 LTS
    • Processor: Intel Core 2 Duo, AMD Athlon X2, or equal at 2.0 GHz
    • Memory: 4 GB RAM
    • Graphics: SM 3.0-compatible, 256 MB VRAM
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Additional Notes: We recommend using proprietary Nvidia or AMD drivers.
    Recommended:
    • OS: Ubuntu 12.04 LTS
    • Processor: QuadCore 2.0 GHz +
    • Memory: 4 GB RAM
    • Graphics: SM 3.0-compatible, 512 MB VRAM
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Additional Notes: We recommend using proprietary Nvidia or AMD drivers.
Helpful customer reviews
940 of 1,226 people (77%) found this review helpful
4.2 hrs on record
Better Then Call Of Duty Ghosts
Posted: June 4
Was this review helpful? Yes No
1,669 of 2,419 people (69%) found this review helpful
6.6 hrs on record
NOTICE: This review is extremely old and contains highly outdated information. Please take this into consideration before starting another ♥♥♥♥ing flame war in the comments.

Let’s get this first bit out of the way up in front: putting Goat Simulator on a traditional 1-to-10 rating scale is pretty much impossible.

Goat Simulator is something of a paradox. It's a haphazard conglomeration of shallow, half-♥♥♥♥♥ game mechanics that still somehow equals something much greater than the sum of its parts. Most bargain bin games last too long and don’t have any personality; Goat Simulator bleeds personality but wears itself out much too quickly.

In short, it’s like slamming down 20 bucks for half of a chocolate bar, but it’s the best damn chocolate bar you’ll ever have the pleasure of consuming.

The game prides itself on its broken ragdoll physics; headbutt a person and they’ll go flying off into the sunset with their limbs splayed all about, headbutt a gas station and you’ll go flying off into the sunset with your limbs splayed all about. The problem here is that ragdoll physics abuse has been present in video games for the last decade or so, ranging from dragging bodies around in Deus Ex Human Revolution to blowing enemies sky-high in Just Cause 2 to… well, Garry’s Mod, full stop. Everything you’re going to see in this game is something you’ve probably already seen before.

Perhaps the game’s biggest flaw is its scoring mechanics. Or, to be more specific, that the scoring mechanics don’t really mesh with the rest of the game all that well. By performing certain actions, such as ramming things, licking things, and jumping over things, you can combo these actions together to increase your score as well as extend your combo and gain score multipliers. However, most of the actions you can perform that won’t result in your goat ragdolling uncontrollably will stop increasing your score multiplier VERY quickly, and if you DO end up ragdolling, chances are high that you won’t be able to recover in time to extend your combo further anyways.

The most aggravating part of this discrepancy is that the actions that do result in you ragdolling uncontrollably – such as getting thrown into a trampoline by a rogue treadmill – are worth the most points out of any action in the game. This is only made worse once you realize that trying to earn a high score unlocks absolutely NOTHING. Compare to Saints Row IV’s insurance fraud missions, where you have to abuse your ragdoll enough within a set amount of time in exchange for monetary and experience rewards.

Paradoxically, the game’s strongest point is its bizarre sense of humor, and I’m not referring to the cheap novelty of playing as a jelly-legged goat. The game’s too-small map is absolutely jam-packed with easter eggs and shout-outs. Destroying the gas station gets you the Michael Bay achievement. Bringing five people to a pentagram gives you the power to create gravity wells. Dragging a boulder in front of a normally indestructible car causes it to explode violently. Bringing a bacon-beacon to a crop circle causes a UFO to abduct you. There are rioters carrying signs that read “no penis-shaped food”. Standing inside an outhouse for three seconds nets you over a thousand points. There’s an anime robot hiding in a shipping container suspended by a crane. Doing nothing for five minutes turns you into a low-gravity angel goat. Coffee Stain Studios’ in-game building features a playable Flappy Bird clone. The list goes on and on and on.

Because of the large amount of easter eggs present within the game, the game is at its most entertaining when you’re NOT throwing yourself around like a maniacal rubber squirrel. Finding many of the upgrades for your goat requires exploring the game’s environment, which itself requires a surprising amount of dexterity. There’s a Baseball Cannon nearby where you start the game, which you can strap to your back and fire at will. There’s also the Jet Pack hidden inside the construction site, which is about as useful as you’d expect from a game like this (it’s completely useless). Perhaps the most noteworthy of these collectables are the 30 goat trophies hidden across the map; every 10 trophies you collect will unlock a whole new species of goat for you to use: a giraffe, an ostrich, and an alien from Sanctum 2. Quite a few of these trophies are legitimately challenging – and entertaining - to collect.

Perhaps the game’s greatest saving grace is the Steam Workshop integration. Though ironically (or perhaps fittingly), even getting THAT to work properly can be problematic – you’ll need to install the 64-bit version of the game’s executable, which comes with the game’s mod development kit. And even then, many of the custom maps available will still cause the game to crash on startup.

Once you’ve gotten the bloody thing to WORK properly, however, it’s worthwhile. Some of the community-created add-ons are an absolute blast to use. There are mods that let you chuck explosive watermelons as fast as you can mash the use key, there are mods that turn you into a goat-shaped Nyan Cat, and there are mods that let you play pinball with the goat as the ball. Since the game is still brand new, much of the game’s potential has gone untapped. However, given some time, the possibility that a truly amazing game could evolve from these add-ons is extremely realistic… provided that said add-ons don’t freakin' crash the game.

Overall, the game itself honestly isn’t all that bad – it’s actually pretty entertaining, but for all the reasons that they DON’T mention on the game’s Steam Store page. The game’s biggest flaw isn’t that the game is broken, it’s that the game is… incomplete. There’s a lot of stuff to see here, especially with the game’s Workshop integration, but the game’s core mechanics simply don’t mesh with each other very well (if at all). The game doesn’t even seem to know what its core audience is supposed to be – small children, experienced DOOM-era gamers, and programmers would probably find the game hilarious, but your average Angry Birds player will look at this game and wonder how the world became so full of stupid people.

If you’re the type of person who greatly enjoys making mods, enjoys breaking games in half, or simply needs a cheap laugh once in a while, then Goat Simulator may very well be one of the best games you’ll ever play. However, if you don’t fit into any of the above categories, then I regret to inform you that you’re probably better off spending your money on something else.

It’s a shame, really – there’s a fantastic game buried in here somewhere, it’s just that nobody’s found it yet.
Posted: April 7
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613 of 900 people (68%) found this review helpful
0.5 hrs on record
Obviously, Goat Simulator was never meant to be anything more than an interactive joke in the world of games. And as a joke, it exceeds all expectations.

However, as a game that is for sale it falls short of reasonable expectations. After all of 30 minutes, the novelty of "I can run up to X and headbutt it" passes. With that passing comes the realisation of just how shallow the game really is.
Posted: April 8
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133 of 185 people (72%) found this review helpful
2.1 hrs on record
It's like GTA V but with goats
Posted: April 26
Was this review helpful? Yes No
159 of 231 people (69%) found this review helpful
1.2 hrs on record
I don't like it. The gag is as follows.

"Hey! Look at this silly goat! It's doing things that goats don't normally do! lolololololol ragdol fisikz"
As you could probably guess, the gag wears thin quickly. There are some good laughs in the achievement "Micheal Bay", which you get from exploding a gas station, but they're one-time jokes.
The few maps are pretty small, condensed, but don't have enough content to be fun for more than 20 minutes each.

"But you can download more!", I hear you cry, but alas- mods suck. The modding community is smaller than a pinecone that has been grown to a couple pages worth of pinecone-leave-things that crash the game when they're loaded.* The other "goats" you can download and unlock are, again, good for a few laughs. I've never seen another game where Shrek can fly around on all fours with a jetpack before lightly touching a vent and being flung into the stratosphere. The problem is that said experience is just not fun, and it takes control from your hands for a while until you hit the ground again.

The scoring system makes absolutely no sense what-so-ever, it seems to just throw points at you willy-nilly for being airborne and doing some spins or something, but it feels like however many points I got had nothing to do with me, making most of the achievements feel meaningless, as most of them come up to "Score points" or "Stay airborne for x seconds".

I know the game was made in a short time, I know it's meant to be bad, but that doesn't excuse it. Calling a rock a rock doesn't make it better than a rock.* Also, the game doesn't run very well on most computers, and that's weird.

tl:dr
Buy Garry's Mod. Same price, runs better on most computers, the gags in this game can be met and expanded upon with GM, better graphics, more interesting to play, and it also has ragdolls. There's probably a reason why almost every positive review of this game only talks about the fact that goats are in the game, so 10/10.

*Aren't I great at analogies?
Posted: June 13
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18,428 of 19,792 people (93%) found this review helpful
9.5 hrs on record
All my life I have been empty. The doctors could not tell me why I was so depressed, and I never knew myself until today. I needed to experience my life as a goat. Goat Simulator has filled the void in my life.

I knew as soon as I hit the truck with my goat that this was what I had been missing. I flew through the air in slow motion, tongue flying around, hitting the edge of the map and rebounding back, landing on (and falling through) the roof of a house. I could not get out, but that did not matter. I was treated with the ability to look down into the house beneath me, seeing the unsuspecting people casually sitting at their computers, oblivious to the sheer terror of the goat above them.

Whether it was playing football with a basketball, swinging lampposts into groups of people or even doing 1080 degree flips, there was no limit to life as a goat. I didn't think it could get any better than this.

I was wrong.

As I jumped and screamed my way around the map, leaving a path of destruction in my wake, I happened upon a golden statue. Curiosity overtook me and I resisted the urge to grab it no longer. My life as a goat changed completely. I had a jetpack.

I knew that this was meant to be, and what my mission from the Great Coffee Stain in the sky was. I was granted the supergoat power of being able to lift people and cars with my tongue. I could survive any impact. I could slow down time with mere thought. Now I could fly. It was time for world domination. Humanity had to be silenced so that the new goat overlords could reign supreme.


All the humans are dead or enslaved. I have won. I am the goat, the goat is me.

Go and goat this game. I kid you not, for mere bucks you can experience a sandbox like no other. Destruction, mayhem, death defying stunts. Seriously, there are more than 921 million goats in the world. Killing the humans was just part of the game. This is a SIMULATOR. Do you understand? A SIMULATOR. This can happen. There are enough goats out there to enslave us and/or kill us.

It is your duty as a human to get this game, so that you may truly know your enemy. An enemy people do not take seriously, an enemy that we know nothing about. Coffee Stain studios have granted us the insight into the true terrifying reality of the impending Goatpocalypse. This is your weapon against the goats. Be prepared, for the goats are coming to get us.
Posted: March 28
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