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Koupit Goat Simulator

Koupit Goat Simulator: Soundtrack Edition

Includes the base game and original soundtrack

 

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"Simon's GOTY (Goat of the Year) 2014."
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5. března

GOAT SIMULATOR PLUSHIE IS HERE!!!111.



PRE ORDER HERE http://www.welovefine.com/9308-goat-simulator-plush-pre-purchase.html

IT EVEN HAS A VELCRO TONGUE
TELL YOUR MOM ASAP
CALL THE POLICE
SHIT IN A BAG

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3. prosince 2014

New patch is out!

Greetings goats!

You might be wondering why your Steam client is magically updating Goat Simulator. The answer is of course that we just released a new patch!

We've fixed a lot of issues, mainly achievement bugs, quests that didn't work, but we've also added some new achievements and you'll also be able to use the inventory as a mutator on the first two maps as well!

Here are the full patch notes:

General fixes:
The MMO level won’t autostart for new players.
Force Load button on the play menu to load out of date mods.
NPC now goat armor.
Start actor can now be rotated to view class.
XP bar no longer overflows.
Minimap now works for multiple players.
The Portal in Twistram is now open after completing DumbleDoor’s quest.
Resetting game now clears mutators.
Fixed issues with Flappy Goat not rendering.
The inventory is now a mutator that can be used on any map.
Dodo follow up quest now works.
NPC’s also reports as quest items so that you can bring McSlowpants on your inventry to the tavern.

Achievements
Fixed: Elfstreetboys
Fixed: Old Goat
Fixed: Powerhoof SMASH
Fixed: Maximum MLG Big Plays
Fixed: Angel Goat
Jousting Goat only granted when goat gets knocked by the horse.
Added two new achievements, “Love or Hate?” and “The Icelandic Experience” .

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Nový stáhnutelný obsah

Informace o hře

Goat Simulator is the latest in goat simulation technology, bringing next-gen goat simulation to YOU. You no longer have to fantasize about being a goat, your dreams have finally come true! WASD to write history.

Gameplay-wise, Goat Simulator is all about causing as much destruction as you possibly can as a goat. It has been compared to an old-school skating game, except instead of being a skater, you're a goat, and instead of doing tricks, you wreck stuff. Destroy things with style, such as doing a backflip while headbutting a bucket through a window, and you'll earn even more points! Or you could just give Steam Workshop a spin and create your own goats, levels, missions, and more! When it comes to goats, not even the sky is the limit, as you can probably just bug through it and crash the game.

Disclaimer

Goat Simulator is a completely stupid game and, to be honest, you should probably spend your money on something else, such as a hula hoop, a pile of bricks, or maybe pool your money together with your friends and buy a real goat.

Key Features

  • You can be a goat
  • Get points for wrecking stuff - brag to your friends that you're the alpha goat
  • Steam Workshop support - make your own goats, levels, missions, game modes, and more!
  • MILLIONS OF BUGS! We're only eliminating the crash-bugs, everything else is hilarious and we're keeping it
  • In-game physics that bug out all the time
  • Seriously look at that goat's neck
  • You can be a goat

Mac and Linux Disclaimer

The Mac and Linux ports are still in Beta. Expect problems. We're working on fixing them asap!

Systémové požadavky

Windows
Mac OS X
SteamOS + Linux
    Minimum:
    • OS: Windows Vista
    • Processor: 2.0 GHz Dual Core Processor
    • Memory: 2 GB RAM
    • Graphics: Shader Model 3.0, 256 MB VRAM
    • DirectX: Version 9.0c
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Sound Card: DirectX 9.0c-compatible, 16-bit
    Recommended:
    • OS: Windows 7 or 8
    • Processor: 2.0 GHz Quad Core Processor
    • Memory: 4 GB RAM
    • Graphics: Shader Model 3.0, 512 MB VRAM
    • DirectX: Version 9.0c
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Sound Card: DirectX 9.0c-compatible, 16-bit
    Minimum:
    • OS: OS X 10.7
    • Processor: 1,4 GHz Intel i5, 2.0 GHz Dual Core
    • Memory: 4 GB RAM
    • Graphics: Intel HD Graphics 4000
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Additional Notes: MacBook Pro 2011, iMac 2011, MacBook Air 2012
    Recommended:
    • OS: OS X 10.8
    • Processor: 2 GHz Intel i5 Processor
    • Memory: 4 GB RAM
    • Graphics: Intel HD Graphics 5000
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Additional Notes: 2013 models or better
    Minimum:
    • OS: Ubuntu 12.04 LTS
    • Processor: 2.0 GHz Dual Core Processor
    • Memory: 4 GB RAM
    • Graphics: Shader Model 3.0, 256 MB VRAM
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Additional Notes: We recommend using proprietary NVIDIA/AMD drivers
    Recommended:
    • OS: Ubuntu 12.04 LTS
    • Processor: 2.0 GHz Quad Core Processor
    • Memory: 4 GB RAM
    • Graphics: Shader Model 3.0, 512 MB VRAM
    • Hard Drive: 2 GB available space
    • Additional Notes: We recommend using proprietary NVIDIA/AMD drivers
Užitečné recenze od zákazníků
12 z 17 osob (71%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
1 osoba ohodnotila tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
5.0 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 15. listopadu 2014
Hra se skvělým nápadem, který tvůrci maximálně využili. Je to sice kravina, ale je to zábavné - doporučuji všem trollerům.
Byla tato recenze užitečná? Ano Ne Vtipná
5 z 6 osob (83%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
1 osoba ohodnotila tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
73.9 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 2. ledna
boží hra! miluju ji!
Byla tato recenze užitečná? Ano Ne Vtipná
2 z 2 osob (100%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
1 osoba ohodnotila tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
5.6 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 28. března
Super hra hlavne mmo mod sem tam lvl 36
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3 z 4 osob (75%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
1 osoba ohodnotila tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
2.8 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 24. prosince 2014
NEJVÍC REKT
Byla tato recenze užitečná? Ano Ne Vtipná
1,611 z 1,864 osob (86%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
17 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
9.5 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 27. listopadu 2014
Have been chatting to people for 3 hours until I realised I wasn't really playing online.

10/10 would talk to bots again
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5,927 z 7,082 osob (84%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
14 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
5.4 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 20. listopadu 2014
Still a better MMO than The Elder Scrolls online.
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2,112 z 2,639 osob (80%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
12 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
5.3 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 26. listopadu 2014
the book was better
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1,653 z 2,099 osob (79%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
11 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
10.5 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 12. listopadu 2014
Goat Simulator has a deep story line and boasts some of the best physics and graphics I've seen in any modern day game. The portrayal of each character is well thought-out and the achievements gained by playing the game are meaningful. Whether you are gracefully flying over a map after a large explosion, or helping a person cross the road, players of all ages are bound to enjoy this game. My grandmother watched me play the game, and now she has set up her own Steam account for the sole purpose of playing Goat Simulator. Even my dog Clifford is getting into it, and now has accumulated over 300 hours worth of solid gamplay. Coffee Stain Studios should be given a big pat on the back and a rousing round of applause.

11/10- Would lick again
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1,515 z 1,931 osob (78%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
10 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
25.0 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 20. listopadu 2014
Playing this game is like making love to a beautiful woman. It’s something I can only do when I’m a goat.
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1,489 z 1,942 osob (77%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
10 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
6.4 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 4. listopadu 2014
I crashed into a garden party, set everyone on fire with a stove and dragged them into the forest, to sacrifice the people to satan, so I could become a demon goat.

10/10 would play again
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527 z 679 osob (78%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
6 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
1.5 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 20. listopadu 2014
This is by far the best Goat simulator game on the market today.
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2,098 z 2,811 osob (75%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
7 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
5.1 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 6. listopadu 2014
Licked a woman
did not get arrested

69/10 beastialty sim 2k14 IGN approves
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809 z 1,147 osob (71%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
4 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
5.4 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 9. listopadu 2014
An incredibly accurate simulator of the life of a goat.
Byla tato recenze užitečná? Ano Ne Vtipná
512 z 724 osob (71%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
1 osoba ohodnotila tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
0.4 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 26. listopadu 2014
Goat Simulator prevented my suicide.
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281 z 387 osob (73%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
2 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
23.1 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 10. listopadu 2014
Intro
Have you ever dreamed of being a goat? Exploring lands as a goat? Maybe smashing into cars and watching them blow up? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this game is for you! If you answered no to any of these questions, this game is for you!

Goat Simulator is a game in which you take on the role of a goat. An invincible goat, that is. You start in a small town with a party, construction site, and a satanist sacrifice forest. You can simply roam the city and explore, you can cause mass chaos and blow up gas containers or parked cars, you could become a sky diving goat and jump off a construction crane, hitch a ride on a paraglider, or get hit by a bus just because you can!

What you can do as a goat
  1. Fly with a jetpack uncontrollably
  2. Get hit by a bus
  3. Lick a bolder and throw it down at civilians having a barbeque
  4. Have a party and become DeadGoa7
  5. Get beet up by people in an ally
  6. Ride a bike
  7. Use your oh so powerful tongue of yours to hold onto a ferris wheel
  8. Swim by simply jumping in water and willing yourself to move
  9. Become an angel goat
  10. Become a devil goat
  11. Become a anything-you-eat-will-turn-into-a-bomb goat
  12. Go on the workshop and become a <fill in workshop item here> goat.
  13. Do anything else you've ever desired to do as a goat
  14. Run head on into a building/car and just fall down
  15. Scale walls with your amazing goat sprint jump ninja skills
  16. Run into civilians and hear them scream because they fell over and watch them glide up and run away
  17. Walk into a carnival, jump into a booth, people scream, trying to run away, and then say "Is that a goat??!"
Score: Goat/10 would play again

System Specs
CPU: AMD FX 8320 OC at 4.1GHz
GPU: EVGA GTX 760 OC
RAM: 8GB RAM
Byla tato recenze užitečná? Ano Ne Vtipná
543 z 792 osob (69%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
4 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
8.9 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 7. listopadu 2014
I blew up a gas station and got a Michael Bay achievement. 10/10
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154 z 215 osob (72%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
1 osoba ohodnotila tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
24.6 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 22. listopadu 2014
I recommend this game for people who laugh at anything. If you get bored easily and are very critical about your video games, don't get it.
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246 z 404 osob (61%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
2 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
4.8 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 11. listopadu 2014
Goat. Lick. Headbutt. Kill everything. Explosions. Lag. Ride a bikesickle. Get hit by a car. Jump off a skyscraper. More Goat. More lag. Giraffe, Penguin, Demon Goat, Ostrich. Jetpack.

10/9 would Goat again.
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20 z 21 osob (95%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
23.0 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 2. května
So I was deciding whether to do a serious review on Goat Simulator because I haven't seen one on Steam; so rather than join the bandwagon of unfunny jokey reviews for the game, I'll stick to my guns...

Goat Simulator does exactly what it says on the tin; you play as a Goat, You cause havoc wherever you go; trashing, bashing, causing explosions, destroying houses, jumping on trampolines, basically anything you want. With plenty of interactive objects in the game, you can spend plenty of time wandering around never finding a dull moment.

The graphics in goat simulator are really nice. They aren't on the levels of Evolve or something, but for this type of game, you aren't really going to be playing for the top of the range graphics. The music and audio are exactly what you would expect here; derpy music in the background as you potter about the city, along with cries of fear from the civilians as the demon goat runs rampant.

There are three different areas in Goat Simulator; each zone is huge, ranging from theme parks, to crop fields, every building has something to do in it, every room has something to interact with or destroy. I honestly don't think there is anything wrong with either of the levels included here. There is nothing difficult in the game to do here at all. There are no real objectives, just an open world sandbox game where you do whatever you want, whenever you want.

I have managed to put about twenty hours into Goat Simulator; most of this time was playing on local screen co-op with my girlfriend, and then a couple more hours’ achievement hunting, and boy there is some pretty ridiculous achievements to do. Other than the developers openly coming out stating that they would not be fixing any bugs in the game, I had no real game breaking bugs, apart from sometimes falling through the world; however this was fixed easily by just respawning again.

If you want a game that is just purely for messing around in with no real aim and wanting some real stupidity, then Goat Simulator will give you plenty of fun; granted this type of game is not for everyone, I enjoyed it though.

If you found this review helpful, please consider giving it a thumbs up. You can also find more reviews over at http://www.completingthebackloggroup.com/
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95 z 152 osob (63%) ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako užitečnou
2 osob ohodnotilo tuto recenzi jako vtipnou
21.0 hodin celkem
Přidáno: 26. listopadu 2014
When I died in this... Rap died with me.
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