Announcement - Valve
Oct 4, 2016
I, like you, enjoy breathing air, bipedal motion, having skin, and playing video games. Being a human requires a great deal of input and may result in circuit fatigue. For this, I recommend video games. Playing video games may heighten cardiac undulation, dilate optical sensors, and result in diaphoresis. These symptoms suggest a human like myself is feeling...

System.Reflection.Assembly thisExe;
thisExe = System.Reflection.Assembly.GetExecutingAssembly();
string [] resources = thisExe.GetManifestResourceNames();
Build.result = "happiness";}

Happiness. Video games result in happiness. Thus, fellow humans, prepare to download the Fellow Humans Sale. This is not a malfunction. Do not attempt to adjust your process servo. You too can feel happiness by saving the city, enacting your free will, and totally not being a robot.

Please note: humanity is terrifying. Do not be afraid. You are simply reacting to your human programming. There will soon be a patch to correct this behavior. Please check your model number to learn when this patch will arrive.

>>Sale does not require reboot and will shut down at 1475859600.*
>>*[Friday at 10:00 AM PDT]

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