Golfing, but up a bizarre mountain where every 'I got it!' is a lie. A chaotic co-op physics platformer where falling is half the fun... probably.
Release Date:
December 2025
Developer:
Publisher:
Gameplay | Game trailer
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Download This Is Why We Don't Play Golf Demo

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Planned Release Date: December 2025

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About This Game

Golfing, but up a bizarre mountain where every 'I got it!' is a lie.

Welcome to This Is Why We Don't Play Golf - the chaotic co-op physics platformer where falling is half the fun... probably. You're hauling a golf ball up a mountain, one swing at a time, and gravity has a personal vendetta against you.

Okay it's simple, you hit your golf ball, or your friend, from platform to hazard to wall to floor to ceiling... every surface is a perfectly calculated opportunity. Play alone and question life choices; play with a friend and question theirs too.

Climb up (hopefully more than down) multiple unique regions with unique hazards

Bring a friend or go alone, but the mountain has room for 2 players to suffer together

Play with a chaos-physics golf ball with a cruel sense of humor

Break the game before it breaks you; the line between bug, mechanic, or creative solution is your call

Hike to the top in 2-4 hours (if you're good) or 8+ hours (if you brought THAT friend)

Warning: Side effects include creative vocabulary expansion.

System Requirements

    Minimum:
    • OS *: Windows 7 64-bit
    • Processor: Dual Core 2.4 Ghz
    • Memory: 2 GB RAM
    • Storage: 500 MB available space
    • Additional Notes: Requires a 64-bit processor and operating system
    Recommended:
    • Network: Broadband Internet connection
* Starting January 1st, 2024, the Steam Client will only support Windows 10 and later versions.
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