Planned Release Date: 2026

About This Game

🎯 SPLATCHINKO
Oh no. They gave us a pachinko… in space.

You wake up. You’re a HUGE, sentient… thing. You have one giant eye. And you can shoot pupils. Why? Because the universe is broken, Jimmy.
Welcome to Splatchinko: the roguelike where physics is depressed, enemies are space vegetables that judge you, and every shot might doom or save the last constellation of jelly-creatures.

Main Features:

🧠 Eyes as ammo. Pick the right eyeball. Each one has powers. Some of them scream.

🌌 Cosmic pachinko with distorted gravity. The laws of physics? We fired them.

🦑 Ridiculous enemies. Face nostalgic planets, interdimensional fennels, and the dreaded “Arturo.”

🔮 Every run is a trip. Absurd items, random upgrades, and mutations your mother would definitely not approve of.

🤯 Deep lore (written on acid). Who are we? Where are we? What is a planet? No one knows. Maybe the tutorial.

If you’re looking for a serious simulation of gravitational behavior in outer space, go play Kerbal.
But if you’d rather fire eyeballs across galaxies while being insulted by a planet that thinks it’s your uncle—then: SPLATCHINKO AWAITS.