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In Space Warlord Baby Trading Simulator, you of course do not actually trade BABIES. We aren't monsters.

You buy stocks BASED on the simulated lives of babies, profiting from their misery and cashing out the moment they win the Galactic Lottery!

Step into the shoes of baby traders across the universe in a fast-paced series of mini-campaigns. Unlock unique character endings, bet on the lifespans of digitally simulated alien children, and snatch up as many credits as you can, as fast as you can. Purchase the services of strange consultants, gathering data on your trading targets and building your fortune one Trading Rush at a time.

This is the baby-themed arcade stock market sim you didn't know you needed.

Features

• Seven distinct planets to trade procedurally generated alien baby stocks on, each showcasing unique ideas of what it means to be profitable and productive to society.

• Consultants you can hire before the trading day to gain information on your trading targets.

• An anthology of mini-campaigns following the lives and complications of baby traders across the universe.

• A loan shark that won't let you pay him back, because he's then legally allowed to shoot you.

• An arcade satire on stock markets and ruthless exploitation from the creators of I Am Your Beast and Space Warlord Organ Trading Simulator.

• Pulsing electro-industrial soundtrack by Kris Kirk.

• The ability to short a baby, because you believe its life will suck.
  
  

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In this game, you will follow readouts of the simulated futures of alien babies and "watch" as they commit war crimes, get addicted to recreational drugs, become cannibals, find love, put down their favorite pets, acquire corporations, get used for medical experiments, become intergalactic stars, get hunted by the rich for sport, blow up toxic sludge pipelines, commit suicide, win the lottery, and many, many other things in-between.

You will buy, sell, and short stocks based off of these events.

You will likely become very angry at least once when a baby who you are financially incentivized to watch crash and burn pulls their life together.

And that's okay.

If you feel uncomfortable at any point while playing, please take a break from playing and speak to someone you trust.