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Ultionus is a love-letter to the home computer arcade games of the late 80s and early 90s, with colorful 2D visuals, catchy chiptune music by the legendary Jake 'Virt' Kaufman, and 7 stages of hard-as-nails gameplay.
Release Date: Feb 25, 2014
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Buy Ultionus: A Tale of Petty Revenge


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Attention Be Mine 11 bundle purchasers.

February 26th, 2014

Small change of plans. If you sent me an email with your Desura key today - I apologize to have put you through that.

As of right now - your Steam key is available through the Groupees page - simply find the email you got from Groupees when you purchased the Be Mine 11 bundle, and click on the "personal purchase page" link.

Cheers, and sorry for the earlier confusion.

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“The levels and characters are all fun to look at, and the whole world seems lush and alive.”
3.8/5 – Mash Those Buttons

“...the crass humor may not appeal to everyone, the sharp design and challenge that’s found in Ultionus will strike some kind of chord with anyone who initially play it and nostalgia withstanding.”
4/5 – Press Pause Radio

About the Game

Galactic hero Serena S has been trolled on Spacebook. This is obviously a cause to embark on an epic quest to punish the troll in question, who just happens to be The Space Prince. Guide Serena through 7 stages of shmup action, jumping, shooting, and yet decidedly more jumping and shooting to her ultimate goal of total testicular annihilation of her foe. Ultionus is a love-letter to the home computer arcade games of the late 80s and early 90s, particularly Halloween Harry, Astro Marine Corps, Duke Nukem 2 and especially Phantis/Game Over II. The game features tons of lovingly crafted pixel art, and a rockin' chiptune soundtrack by the legendary Jake 'Virt' Kaufman.

PC System Requirements

    • OS: Windows XP
    • Processor: 1.6 GHz
    • Memory: 512 MB RAM
    • DirectX: Version 9.0c
    • Hard Drive: 65 MB available space

Mac System Requirements

    • Memory: 512 MB RAM
    • Hard Drive: 65 MB available space

Linux System Requirements

    • Memory: 512 MB RAM
    • Hard Drive: 65 MB available space
Helpful customer reviews
33 of 44 people (75%) found this review helpful
540 products in account
15 reviews
2.9 hrs on record
TL;DR: Retro-styled in looks, sound, and difficulty, this sidescrolling run-and-gun platformer with some shmup stages will slap you around a bit, but will still play fair.

I'll preface this by saying I got this in the Groupees Be Mine 11 bundle. And this is probably the first time I've gotten a game, downloaded it, played it, AND beat it all in the span of maybe a couple of days. So with that said...

Ultionus is the story of a woman, her robot head partner, and a social networking comment that leads to a crash landing and a lot of things to kill. As you can tell by the screenshots, it's a "retraux" game, a modern game made with retro-inspired graphics and gameplay. You actually don't have a gun at the very start, so you need to rely on your bouncing robot head partner to destroy the enemies as you move to the left, and then you get a gun and can start blasting everything to death. This threw me off at first, but that's what experimentation is for, right?

I thought this game was pretty hard on Normal, but it wasn't unfair about it. Our heroine can only take so many hits before she explodes in a shower of cartoon hearts and respawns at the last checkpoint or stage entrance. You get restored to full health when you pass a checkpoint the first time or find a red heart 1UP. Controls are fairly tight, though Serena is a little slow on the ground and especially while firing since she stops altogether. You'll be spending most of your time in the air, and thankfully this game doesn't fall into "Castlevania 1 jumping" where you can't change directions mid-air. Hitboxes seemed pretty accurate and there aren't really any fancy controls. For the 360 controller, A could be tapped or held to change the height you jump, X and B fire your ray gun, Y doesn't seem to do anything, and the d-pad and stick both can be used for movement. No movement faster than a leisurely walk, no sliding, no wall-jumping...simple stuff.

There are upgrades, but you not only have to find a special coin in each level, but also get to the merchant's door. I'd also add "and have enough money to buy the upgrades" but you get money by killing everything you see, and you'll be doing that anyway. You have to choose between offense and defense, and you can only pick one per stage. If you find the coin and door that is. There are multiple routes through each normal platforming stage, and the auto-scrolling vehicle ones obviously only have one route. Get to the end of the level and you fight a giant enemy thing. Die and you start the fight all over again. Learn the boss patterns or you'll eat through your stock of lives (on Normal and Hardcore; Easy gives you infinite).

I would honestly suggest trying this on Easy first. It takes the pressure off of playing well and it'll allow you to go through stages by different routes and learn boss routines, even though running out of lives merely gives you a prompt to start the level over with 9 lives and all of your money, or exit the game. I started on Normal, and I honestly game overed twice, though I didn't get the best ending (the bad ending spells out what you need to do to avert it though). The dev has said on the Steam forum that playing on harder difficulties will unlock achievements for that and the difficulty level(s) below it. So if you get the best ending on Normal, you get the Easy achievement too, for example. There aren't many achievements but they're actually something to work towards. Without trying, I got two for winning on Normal with the bad ending and watching the credits all the way through.

Graphics are really colorful and the animations are quite nice. You can pretty easily tell what would hurt you and what won't, and there's quite a bit of detail work done here. You don't really notice the big border after a while. I didn't really feel like I'd do better if I didn't see it at all. The music's pretty catchy and I kinda wish there was a sound test option (or maybe there is one and I just haven't unlocked it yet). I don't really have much to say about the sound effects. They're there.

I won't do my usual "I liked/disliked this" sections since there's not much to say. I had fun. My heart raced, I cursed, and I'm not only glad this is on Steam, but I'm glad I gave this game a chance. It's short, but there's a little bit of replay value, and I can see myself giving this game a few more hours. I've forgotten what it's like to actually have to learn patterns and get penalized by starting boss fights over when I don't.
Posted: February 28th, 2014
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53 of 80 people (66%) found this review helpful
77 products in account
1 review
4.5 hrs on record
Ultionus is graphically beautiful, fun, challenging, and has more character and personality than many recent AAA titles that I've played. The achievements are pretty difficult and will take you several play-throughs to acquire. The game has replay value through multiple endings, multiple power up choices, and multiple difficulty levels.

All stages keep the gameplay fresh, and after a slight learning curve, you'll find yourself blasting enemies like a pro. In all, this is a fantastic homage to the 16bit classics, and you'll be itching for a sequel when you're done!
Posted: February 25th, 2014
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57 of 87 people (66%) found this review helpful
336 products in account
11 reviews
2.5 hrs on record
There's a lot to like about Ultonions: the bright retro graphics, the chip'ish music and even the sexuliased 80s heroine. But... The gameplay is not quite bad but the design aimed for retro and ended up with unresponsive instead.

You can aim in only 4 directions, left, diagonal left/up. right and diagonal right/up. It would have been better as an 8-way scheme. Or even just up - I want to shoot up.

You can shoot or walk, not both. And you walk slowly. This may be a side effect but quickly swinging round to shoot and swinging back again seem to stick. This is incredibly annoying when dealing with fast moving flying enemies.

The crouch animation is unusually long, you must wait for it to finish before firing or walking again. Popping down to shoot and popping back up to jump and dodge stuff is not going to happen.

About a fifth of your view is obscured on the left and right by the decorative interface. This makes the dino-riding stage particularly vexing as you can't see what's coming.

I cramped my thumb trying shoot fast - I haven't managed that since I had a Commodore 64. Not sure if this is a good or bad point.

I'm not recommending this but is a weak non-recommendation. Learning from your mistakes is big part of the game and that's good reto but not having the space to see or control responsiveness to react is bad retro. Games like Thundercats, Mask and Turrican all got this right 30 years ago - Ultonious really should have too.
Posted: March 7th, 2014
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103 of 176 people (59%) found this review helpful
1,313 products in account
5 reviews
0.2 hrs on record

Bazooms, Beanbags, Blinkers, Bon Bons, Bongos, Boulders, Bra Buddies, Bumpers, Cantaloupes, Cha-chas, Coconuts, Fog Lights, Fun Bags, Gazongas, Gob Stoppers, Grapefruits, Head Lamps, Honeydews, Honkers, Hood-Ornaments, Hoohas, Hooters, Howitzers, Jugs, Knockers, Mammaries, Melons, Milk Cans, Pompoms, Snuggle Pups, Spongecakes, Sugar Plums, Sweater Meat, Sweet Rolls, Tatas, Tetons, Torpedoes, Zeppelins....

This game's got 'em.

10/10 (5 points per boob).
Posted: February 26th, 2014
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50 of 81 people (62%) found this review helpful
204 products in account
5 reviews
0.5 hrs on record
a great game if you an old gaming dude like me , reminds me of how awesome the 90s were in the days of AMIGA and IBM PC , the game has a great vibe of some great platformers that are too old for me to remember , but they share almost the same palette colours and guns , a wonderful game , i highly recommend it.
Posted: February 25th, 2014
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