The first time my friend showed me a blue hedgehog whizzing across the screen from left-to-right, I knew I had to get a Mega Drive. It didn’t stop there, though: I had to read the comics, watch the cartoon, get the toys. Sonic The Hedgehog became a pivotal figure in my life as soon as I laid eyes on him.

And then he let me down.

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In Sonic Generations, the unnatural hedgehog meets his younger, pot-bellied self as Sega attempts to show that it can recapture its old magic, while proving that there’s a place for its blue mascot in the modern world. As the slowest creature on two legs, who dreams nightly of great athletic feats, I am the ideal choice to tell you wot I think of the blue speedster’s latest.>

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