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The Useless Wizard

An alcoholic wizard with no spells, only rocks, must save his village from depraved monster hordes. Tactical action, chaotic weapon combos, and dark humor collide in this unique twist on the Vampire Survivors formula!

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Utgivelsesdato:

24. okt. 2025

Utvikler:

The Useless Dev

Utgiver:

The Useless Publisher

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Engelsk	✔	✔
Fransk	✔	✔
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Spansk – Spania	✔	✔
Japansk	✔	✔
Portugisisk – Brasil	✔	✔
Russisk	✔	✔
Koreansk	✔	✔

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Tittel: The Useless Wizard
Sjanger: Action, Lettbeint, Indie, Tidlig tilgang

Utvikler: The Useless Dev

Utgiver: The Useless Publisher

Utgivelsesdato: 24. okt. 2025
Utgivelsesdato for tidlig tilgang: 24. okt. 2025

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Hva utviklerne har å si:

Hvorfor tidlig tilgang?

«We chose Early Access to build the game together with our community. Player feedback is essential to balance, improve, and expand the experience. We want to move forward with you and shape the final game together.»

Hvor lenge antas det at dette spillet vil være i tidlig tilgang?

«The Early Access phase will be relatively short, about 2 to 3 months, giving us time to add the planned content and polish the experience with player feedback.»

Hvordan er det planlagt at fullversjonen skal være forskjellig fra versjonen i tidlig tilgang?

«We plan to expand the game with more content over time. Our current roadmap includes adding additional playable characters, new worlds to explore, and more abilities to unlock. Our goal is to provide a complete experience with plenty of variety and replayability, but please note that these plans may evolve during development.»

Hva er nåværende tilstand for versjonen i tidlig tilgang?

«The Early Access version currently includes 4 playable character (out of the 8 planned), 2 complete world with 20 levels and 20 bosses (out of the 8 worlds planned), and around 50 abilities to unlock. The game is stable and fully playable, offering a complete gameplay loop from start to finish of the first world. Additional characters, worlds, and features are planned for future updates.»

Vil spillet være priset annerledes under og etter tidlig tilgang?

«Yes. The price will gradually increase as new updates and content are added, to reflect the game’s growth toward the full release.»

Hvordan planlegger dere å involvere samfunnet i utviklingsprosessen?

«We plan to involve the community by gathering feedback through the Steam forums. Players will be able to share suggestions, report issues, and help shape the direction of development.»

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Om spillet

The village is under attack. Grotesque monster hordes suddenly appear, and the villagers place their last hope in the only wizard around… an alcoholic retiree who knows absolutely no spells. His one and only weapon? Rocks. Lots of rocks.

In The Useless Wizard, absurd humor meets tactical action. Each “day” lasts 5 minutes, during which you must protect the village women from monsters. If they reach the left edge of the screen, they’ll carry one off, and if they’re all gone, you lose.

But even with nothing but stones, a true wizard can adapt. Upgrade your throws, stack dozens of ridiculous abilities, and unleash chaotic weapon combos that turn every run into total mayhem… often uncontrollable.

Key Features:

⚔️ A tactical twist on Vampire Survivors: manage enemies on both horizontal and vertical planes.
🪨 A pathetic yet lovable hero: an alcoholic wizard with no spells, armed only with rocks.
😂 Absurd, tongue-in-cheek humor: silly monsters, bizarre abilities, and unpredictable situations.
🔥 Unlimited combos: every upgrade stacks—no exceptions—leading to powerful, hilarious, and sometimes disastrous effects.
⏳ Fast-paced sessions: survive “day” after “day,” 5 minutes each, with new enemies and bosses gaining powers over time.

Saving a village with a useless wizard might sound impossible. Maybe it is… but at least it’ll be hilarious.