Head to Australia and use all the superpowers you can to deliver fast pizza! Watch out for pizza-haters though! World's Fastest Pizza: It's not easy, when your pizza is so cheesy...
User reviews:
Positive (20 reviews) - 95% of the 20 user reviews for this game are positive.
Release Date: Mar 15, 2016

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About This Game

It's not easy, when your pizza is so cheesy.

Head to Australia in the game critics are calling "Please stop emailing me!" Wage war on the suburbs using an armory of SUPERPOWERS and NOT-SO-SUPERPOWERS in your quest to rid the land of hunger and spread the joys of sexy pizza.

What SUPERPOWERS do you get?

A Personal Assistant Koala , Black Magic, A Cloned Flash Mob, a Time Machine and Bovine Growth Hormones, just to name a few. Nothing particularly weird.


If the game didn't have those, this would all be a waste of your time. I wouldn't waste you time!

Can I make it rain in the game?

Geez, you just dont know when to quit, do you? OF COURSE YOU CAN MAKE IT RAIN.

Who do you play as?

Tortoiseman was born on planet Tortopia before being sent to Earth by his father, J-Dilla, just before the planet's destruction. On Earth, he was adopted by a bogan pizza chef and his wife. Also, he started to display baller superpowers, which he decided to use for the benefit of humanity. Using the awesomely fake name Cornelius Pretorius, he is a pizza boy for World’s Fastest Pizza, a Fremantle fast-food restaurant.

Is Channing Tatum in the game?


Matthew McConaughey?

Why not.

But what about the...

HUSH, child. I know you have many questions, but all I can say is that the answers lie within this remarkable game!

System Requirements

    • OS: Windows XP, Vista, 7 or 8
    • Memory: 1 GB RAM
    • Graphics: 256MB Graphics Memory
    • Storage: 350 MB available space
Customer reviews
Customer Review system updated Sept. 2016! Learn more
Positive (20 reviews)
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19 reviews match the filters above ( Positive)
Most Helpful Reviews  Overall
19 of 24 people (79%) found this review helpful
5 people found this review funny
2.2 hrs on record
Posted: March 15
This review may be read in full below or you can view the review with glorious formatting and pictures in the Early Evaluation originally posted on Vox Ludicus - Review: World's Fastest Pizza

Key provided by the developer

I know what you’re thinking. A serious review on this game? That is a recipe for disaster, kinda like electing Tony Abbott. ‘World’s Fastest Pizza’ is a high speed rogue-like comedy game about delivering pizza to the hungry customers of a sleazy fast-food restaurant. Developed by Oscar Brittain, you play as Tortoiseman, who also works under the alias of Cornelius Pretorius. Aside from winning the naming lottery, the game’s protagonist also has the prestige of working at fast-food restaurant in the outbacks of Australia.

Upon booting this game up, my first reaction was to immediately draw comparisons between the aesthetic in this game and Hotline Miami. They are remarkably similar, Hotline Miami has you deliver justice to the masses of Miami, this game has you deliver pizza to some customers who well, just want pizza. This is often trickier than expected when you include the fact that the rest of Australia seems hell bent on ensuring you don’t deliver the pizza. The soundtrack in this game also reminded me of the halcyon days in Hotline Miami. The menu in this game is quite simple, you can either do the simple tutorial, view the credits, or jump straight into the game. I did not sight an options menu, and as a result, I believe this game is locked in full screen.

The game play in this game is simple, you use the directional buttons or WASD to move your character. In my one and a half hours of play, I wasn’t required to use any other buttons. You frantically navigate through the levels to deliver your pizza to a bulls-eye that is painted on the ground in every level. The faster you delivered the pizza, the more money you received. This seemed quite simple until you realize that the game throws a spanner into the works by setting this game in Australia. Suddenly, you are dodging bullets, running past lizards, breaking through windows and trying to run away from a guy called ‘Doug’. I asked my mate in Brisbane, and he said this was quite realistic. So props to the developer for taking their time to add realism to this game. Your character is a bit thick skinned, which I imagine is necessary to survive in Australia, and as a result can survive multiple hits during his run. At the end of each run you regain full health. After 3 runs, you are taken back to your restaurant to take another order of pizza. It is at this point where you are given the option to spend some of your money to purchase ‘not so superpowers’ to help you survive in suburban Australia. You are able to hire a flash mob, a parrot, a time machine, and even a koala to help you in your quest to deliver the pizza. I was mildly disappointed that you are unable to call in the help of Malcolm Turnbull.

That said, the game does have a few niggling issues. My character sometimes got stuck in an object and jerked around until he was free. This was a bit annoying as it broke away from the otherwise fluid game play. The game could also benefit from a wider variety of levels, but I guess it is a bit difficult when the setting is Australia and 95% of it is desert land and the other 5% is New Zealand.

Overall, the game is quite fun for the price you pay. Costing only $2.99 USD, the game is good for a few hours of cheesy puns and slapstick comedy. The game’s crust is just filled with memes and Australian pop culture references. Definitely pick up this game if you are planning on moving to Australia as it gives an accurate representation of life in the country. For the small price you pay, it is a fun, albeit short, rogue-like game with very fluid movement and full controller support. It will be interesting to see if this developer decides to continue supporting this game in the future.
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23 of 32 people (72%) found this review helpful
8 people found this review funny
0.3 hrs on record
Posted: March 15

In all seriousness, this is a surprisingly fluid rogue-lite which prompts you to keep throwing yourself at its gauntlets of suburban and outback Australia.
Flooded with a litany of jokes that might be lost on an International Audience, there is still a fun game underneath it all.

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7 of 9 people (78%) found this review helpful
3 people found this review funny
0.8 hrs on record
Posted: March 15
This is a fast arcade like game, similar to Zombies Ate my Neighbors.

Lots of levels with randomized goal areas for pizza drops
Many unique upgrades
Variety of unique enemies
Very rewarding for good movement (Faster pizza delivery gives more money)

I played for about half an hour with my arrows keys and my fingers are exhausted. When you get superspeed it becomes even more intense. You really should play this with a controller or joystick
There's a boss that isn't really explained how to beat and you just run around confused as to how you kill him. You'll easily make it back to him though
My main gripe is the kamikaze enemies that do massive damage. They might kill even if you have the 420 health upgrade but I'm not sure, they're just not very fun.
EDIT: I'd really like a pause button and to be able to run the game in windowed mode but there are no options to do so
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2 of 2 people (100%) found this review helpful
0.1 hrs on record
Posted: June 29
Only a "true" australian will buy this game.

"Welcome to Straya ♥♥♥♥"
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3 of 4 people (75%) found this review helpful
1.3 hrs on record
Posted: June 26
Fat Pizza: The Video Game
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny
4 of 6 people (67%) found this review helpful
4 people found this review funny
0.7 hrs on record
Posted: April 24
The (un)official prequal of what happened before Hotline Miami. 10/10
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4 of 6 people (67%) found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
0.2 hrs on record
Posted: March 26
If you’ve ever wanted a slice of what toilet humor is like in Austraya then you’ll want to get your hands on this pizza. For reals.

This is the game most Aussie bogans have been waiting their entire lives to play and if they haven’t then you know they’re nothing but bloody ♥♥♥♥♥♥s.

Great humor, fantastic bloody writing, it’s fully sick. Game controls are smooth and rapid. This game is faster than a V8 on steroids. Your mission should you choose to accept it ya mug is to deliver pizzas in a crazy Austraya where everyone’s out to get ya like they’re from a combination of Wolf Creek and Mad Max. Game is a rogue-like in nature. Reminds me somewhat of Hotline Miami but it’s quite a bit more open than that.

If I was to pinpoint any issues with the gameplay it’d be that police are now targeting the occasional stuck in an object problem. But its only a small one and only happened twice in my time with the game. The other issue is that ya might not understand the Aussie humor but that’s cuz ya a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ mate and need to play this game and watch some more Aussie ♥♥♥♥ ya ♥♥♥♥.

Get the game if you’re wanting to laugh your ♥♥♥ off and enjoy these types of games. If not then keep it in your pants bro. But for 3 bucks mate Bobs ya uncle and ya laughin’. Get this game today if ya don’t win our bloody giveaway.

For our epic giveaways and similar reviews head to http://www.steamified.com/

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1 of 1 people (100%) found this review helpful
0.8 hrs on record
Posted: May 5
I am happy to recommend this.

I would pay for DLC if this bloke made some.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny
1 of 1 people (100%) found this review helpful
0.3 hrs on record
Posted: July 1
What looks to be an amateur game could actually serve as an apt sequel
to a game Generation X spent 25 cents, every two minutes, to play back in
the 1980's


..but with some crass humor and drug refrence that would've been a big no-no
at the time.
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1 of 1 people (100%) found this review helpful
0.5 hrs on record
Posted: June 24
Probably the most accurate portrayal of Australia I have ever witnessed
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Recently Posted
1.1 hrs
Posted: April 20
Fun little Timewaster game. Short story, Random generated levels and powerups make every new game unique and fun.
Helpful? Yes No Funny
Jay Garrick
0.6 hrs
Posted: March 28
Wacky, crazy, and sometimes leaves you asking "what the ♥♥♥♥ is going on", but for the price it's a good fun little game that feels a bit like Hotline Miami. Feel free to have a look at my first impressions here.
Helpful? Yes No Funny
0.9 hrs
Posted: March 27
Helpful? Yes No Funny