The Unlicensed Bible game that should have been buried in a desert is back !! and this time its taking no prisoners on its metaphysical "psychosis quest" into the very nature of God and death. Narrated By award winning No-wave high priestess Jarboe (SWANS,The path).
User reviews: Overwhelmingly Negative (1,372 reviews)
Release Date: Sep 12, 2014
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December 13

Tin foil hats and tinsel! its a RSG Christmas!

It's that special time of year again, the celebration of that one distinct hypostasis of God, born in poverty to save his people from the oppression of the supernatural entity "Sin".

Emmanuel ("God with us")

Why not celebrate this festival of giving by gifting Uriel's chasm.
The game that celebrates

NOT ONE...

NOT TWO...

BUT ALL THREE hypostasis of God. *

Uriel's chasm was built from the ground up to be the gift your grandmother got you, that you were just stuck with. Many of these went on to hold the most nostalgia.

Be somebodies evil grandmother , TODAY!

A % of the money raised will go to an independent food bank serving those hit hardest by the recession; in the very community of the shovelware queens. (as is my growing custom)

Merry Christmas all and we cant wait to unleash the nightmarish world of "Sisters of the amniotic lens" on you In the new year :D

//RSG//


Ps. dont forget to claim your free albums of music by F.tyler

http://ftyler.bandcamp.com/album/electronic-ambient-f-tyler-ptsd-vol-1-lp-2014




* We do not claim to represent every god, but the unknown God of Acts 17:23

"For as I passed along and observed the objects of your worship, I found also an altar with this inscription, ‘To the unknown god.’ What therefore you worship as unknown, this I proclaim to you"

1 comments Read more

November 27

Post mortem (part two)

Quantum entanglement, the sky is a landfill, Darren aronofsky and Jarboe

(feel the power of my buzz words arrghh!!)

Also addressing being the lowest rated game on steam and burying the game in the steam desert.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U4XHTmQR6yY&list=UU4XtH2jf8a5aS3n4exqdvXw

1 comments Read more

Reviews

“This is the kind of game that interrupts gameplay with actual footage of people calling it garbage. The kind that aspires to be viewed as "shovelware." The kind that claims to be "the unlicensed Bible game that should have been buried in the desert." The kind about space nuns saving orbital monasteries, featuring narration by no-wave godhead Jarboe. Uriel's Chasm, in other words, is the kind of game you should play immediately.”
Kill screen daily

“Those who appreciate indie games, particularly ones that push boundaries of what is acceptable for games, should pursue this. Uriel’s Chasm is an uncomfortable, avant-garde title that has hooked me. Chances are more unsuspecting players will continue to fall under its strange spell.”
Hardcore gamer

“Uriel's Chasm is an acquired taste, but something tells me this could find it's way to reaching cult classic status one day.”
Modvive

About This Game

"Sister Tabitha has been asleep 8 years. On route to investigate the disappearance of the orbital Monastery "Enoch's Hope"; She is haunted by reoccurring dreams of a Dimethyltryptamine harvesting "Garden of paradise"."

At least that's what the box said to the obscure avante garde 90's game the "Shovelware Queens" started reviewing.

The Unlicensed Bible game that should have been buried in a desert is back !! and this time its taking no prisoners on its metaphysical "psychosis quest" into the very nature of God and death.

Featuring :-

- Voice over By award winning SWANS no-wave high priestess Jarboe

- Ancient Hebrew story telling techniques of Allegory and Typology.

- Rich Context that infinitely rewards further investigation.

- Gamestyles including a complete re-imagining of Asteroids, High octane "Ghett-ro" Euroshmup action and "Non-Game" meta weirdness.

- Metaphysics drawn from over 7 years of research.

- Pulsing keytar soundtrack by Dylan Barry (Super killer hornet Resurrection, NPPD RUSH, Psichodelya)

System Requirements

    Minimum:
    • OS: Windows 7 and up
    • Processor: 2 gig dual core
    • Memory: 2 GB RAM
    • Graphics: Latest driver direct x 9
    • Sound Card: Latest driver direct x 9
Helpful customer reviews
493 of 546 people (90%) found this review helpful
1.6 hrs on record
Posted: October 29
I got this game for free and I still feel like I paid too much for it.
Was this review helpful? Yes No
549 of 616 people (89%) found this review helpful
15.1 hrs on record
Posted: November 8
TWO GAMES IN ONE!

Card Farming Simulator 2015

and

Uninstall Simulator 2015
Was this review helpful? Yes No
328 of 372 people (88%) found this review helpful
1.3 hrs on record
Posted: October 30
1) Launch this stuff
2) Minimize the window
3) Get your cards
4) Delete this stuff
5) Never remember about it
Was this review helpful? Yes No
199 of 237 people (84%) found this review helpful
1.4 hrs on record
Posted: October 31
uninstall not enough, ill format my computer.
Was this review helpful? Yes No
155 of 180 people (86%) found this review helpful
1.3 hrs on record
Posted: October 18
I have no idea what I am even playing. Is this even a game, or is it random madness? I assume there are multiple levels, but I can't even figure out what to do in the first level, which is a horrible asteroids type game where an anime girl (?) is ranting bible quotes at you.
From reading some more the intent was to make a supposed old bad Bible game -- well, they succeeded absolutely.
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135 of 160 people (84%) found this review helpful
1.3 hrs on record
Posted: October 27
Right, where to start with this game's review.. In all honesty, this is one of the worst games I have EVER played, and I played Gettysberg, Ride to Hell: Retribution and Afterfall Insanity. The soundtrack is awful, the gameplay is awful, the design (for a game like this - similar to Ikaruga) is awful, the controls function well so at least the developer got that right. Initially you are thrown into the most non-sensical cutscene I have watched in a long time, and no, it's not me that got it wrong, it's them, then the voice acting.. Terrible, apparently the voice actress has won awards? Probably the most dull and awfully acted voice in the history of gaming. Then there is the game itself. It just makes no sense, even in it's joke of a fantasy universe. It is incredibly unhelpful and gives no instruction other than dialogue that makes no sense and is spaced out like a baby let loose on Microsoft Office Word. The constant flickering signs of the neon dialogue just hurts your eyes. They should have an epilepsy warning but then again epileptics would never set hands on this joke. Either way I got this game for free and you know what? It wasn't even worth it. Steam should PAY ME to take this crap. Also the aspects of religion make no sense. Developer, read the bible again and again until you are too old to make another game.
(Rating = 13/100)
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245 of 317 people (77%) found this review helpful
1.8 hrs on record
Posted: November 2
Best I-run-it-on-background-for-cards simulator ever.
Was this review helpful? Yes No
117 of 139 people (84%) found this review helpful
4.6 hrs on record
Posted: November 21
This game kills you faster than Ebola.
Was this review helpful? Yes No
98 of 113 people (87%) found this review helpful
1.3 hrs on record
Posted: November 16
This game is one of the reasons why intelligent extraterrestrial life forms are omitting planet Earth.

0/10

Pros:
- in some parallel universes this game never came into existence

Cons:
- it exists in our universe
Was this review helpful? Yes No
238 of 321 people (74%) found this review helpful
1.3 hrs on record
Posted: October 27
I got it for free, it gives cards, its bad.
Was this review helpful? Yes No
105 of 131 people (80%) found this review helpful
1.3 hrs on record
Posted: November 11
no
Was this review helpful? Yes No
74 of 86 people (86%) found this review helpful
0.3 hrs on record
Posted: October 29
This game...

I would rather puke in my hands and clap three times than ever see this in my library again

Poor controls, confusing mechanics, voice acting from somebodie's loungeroom and gameplay that looks like bible influenced Asteroids game.
I got this game for free, and i would have to be paid 5$ to play this game, not buy it.
Not even the retro graphics can save this, nothing can,
0/10
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54 of 58 people (93%) found this review helpful
1.4 hrs on record
Posted: October 31
This is possibly the worst game I've ever played.

There isn't a GUI or Start screen, but rather a long, dull introduction that's poorly voiced, poorly written, and unskippable. The story is non-existant, with completely detached, shoddy gameplay and controls; you shoot random asteroids that randomly burst into bibles to raise your "faith" from 200 to 1000 while Uriel's Chasm floats around the map with you, as if any of that has any religious context. The graphics are very basic and mostly hand-drawn, some of which even look like notebook scans of real pencil drawings.

I would have played this game to completion, since it is a quick and mindless shooter, but the controls are incredibly bad. An arena space shooter should have omnidirectional controlling. It's a necessity for every game in the genre. Unfortunately, this game is ONLY controlled with arrow keys, meaning that you can ONLY shoot in the eight basic combinations in which you can fly. There isn't even cursor aiming. You have to be aligned with a diagonally-moving asteroid to shoot it while you close in on it, then it breaks into smaller asteroids which are almost impossible to shoot but easy to run into. Also, you lose faith for being hit with asteroids AND running into the giant, invincible Uriel's Chasm previously mentioned.

It is a negative experience in every way. I can't believe they want people to pay money for it.
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78 of 95 people (82%) found this review helpful
1.5 hrs on record
Posted: November 4
This game costs much more than $5.
You will also pay with:
-Your soul
-Your sanity
-The feeling that you will ever make a valid purchase ever again
-Possibly a few pints of blood from crying when you ran out of tears
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66 of 82 people (80%) found this review helpful
1.3 hrs on record
Posted: October 28
Not worth it even if it's 90% off. If you got it for free get the cards and get rid of it, there are plenty of other games to spend time on.
Valve should be ashamed to have something like this in the Steam store while a lot better games are stuck in Greenlight.

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60 of 77 people (78%) found this review helpful
1.3 hrs on record
Posted: October 27
The intro makes no sense,the effects gives headache,the ESC key exits the game entirely. No options,no explanations,no storyline and most importantly NO GAMEPLAY!
Whoever bought this one for 5 $ just got scammed and that ain't funny!
(they even tell you that,those two english girls explains that very well.)
Telling you how they played some game that ,,sucked,, and then they insert that very game for yourself.
NOW PLAY IT!
This shoud be removed from steam store,from our library and from the face of earth before it's too late.
It's an abomination!!!

And whoever takes this one as a joke and not a serious game then your IQ is not very high..
If it was free we coud all laugh about it but it costs 5$ and the only clown in here woud be yourself.

PS: I coudn't even bare myself to play it long enough so i can get those cards and sell them....
5 min of torture were enough to write a review....
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138 of 211 people (65%) found this review helpful
2.7 hrs on record
Posted: November 4
10/10 Great for uninstalling
Was this review helpful? Yes No
89 of 130 people (68%) found this review helpful
1.3 hrs on record
Posted: October 16
It's a joke game and I get it, it's not making me laugh but I get it.
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37 of 44 people (84%) found this review helpful
7.2 hrs on record
Posted: October 28
After their first game "//N.P.P.D.RUSH// - The Milk Of Ultra Violet" (which, because of the brackets, is firmly at the top of my library) Rail Slave Games comes with another game "Uriel's Chasm".

Basically it's a Top down space shooter like many other games on Steam. The only difference is that in this game you have no idea what you're suppose to do (at least I don't). You often die without knowing what killed you. I do understand that the developers try to come up with something creative with their games (at least that's what I think they are trying), but the game should ofcourse be fun to play.
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87 of 127 people (69%) found this review helpful
1.4 hrs on record
Posted: September 18
Just save your money! Absolutly terrible!
Was this review helpful? Yes No