5th Best of 2020: The same ♥♥♥♥ with new wallpaper; nice wallpaper, granted; the classy stuff you put behind a respected historian in a documentary about the Renaissance, but wallpaper nonetheless.

The world doesn't feel like a vast cohesive whole, the level design isn't great, the lore and characters just doesn't have the same grim, despair-fueled spark – still played through it three times.

It's got the vibe of a mascot platformer from the PS2 era, possibly incorporating SpongeBob SquarePants.

I’d like to see more games have the balls to have an apocalypse half-way through.

Most satisfying ending of any game in quite a while. Goes to show just how important a good ending can be in the grand scheme of things, as I said in my Yelp review for my local Asian massage parlor.

About as post-dad as post-dad gets, combining the three dominant components of the dad psyche: driving around, engine maintenance, and packing the shopping. Oh, and nuclear disasters.

It's clearly one of those games I prize that give an awful lot of ♥♥♥♥ about looking like it doesn't give a ♥♥♥♥

2nd Best of 2023: Talos Principle 2 is great as both a puzzle game and extended thinkpiece, but I suspect the reason it passed under the radar is because it's also not the least bit sexy.

I definitely recommend popping by this awkwardly-positioned convention booth, but don't complain if they've run out of complimentary snack bars and if the folding tables wobble when you lean on them.

I wanted to keep learning more about my situation and my party members; specifically, what they kept inside their underpants... It was vaginas.