Uplink - contact@rockpapershotgun.com (Brendan Caldwell)

As anyone who watches their feeds knows, we live in a constantly evolving cyberpunk dystopia. They’re connecting toilets to the internet, for heavens sake. If this Gibsonist world is just too REAL for you, we have put together the ten best videogames about hacking, programming and computing so you can escape into meta-dystopia. Which I’m sure is a much better place.


DEFCON - contact@rockpapershotgun.com (Brendan Caldwell)


Hello. This is Spawn Point, a new not-quite-regular feature in which we take a genre, series or other facet of gaming culture, and try to convince you to give it a shot. It might be those hero shooters you ve always wanted to get into, or that terrifying space game played by thousands of jerks. We ll briefly explain the thing, followed by some ways for you to breach it.

First up, it s… the real-time strategy. (more…)


Most patch notes are boring. Fixed a bug that stopped a menu from opening properly. D.Va's Defense Matrix doesn't last as long. Wukong's attack speed is 10 percent slower. That's the usual stuff, chronicling important but dull balance changes across years of a game's life. And then there are patch notes like this: "Added cat butchery." "Made all undead respectful of one another." "Tigerman does not have ears."

That's the good stuff.

Those are the kinds of wonderfully crazy patch notes Dwarf Fortress has given us over the years. Determined to top the absurdity of Dwarf Fortress's bizarre changelogs, I put on my deerstalker, grabbed my magnifying glass, and set out to find the strangest patch notes in the history of PC gaming. These absurdities are the result. 


Alpha 12

  • Colonists will visit graves of dead colonists for a joy activity. 

Alpha 16

  • New alert: Unhappy nudity 

Alpha 17

  • Raiders will no longer compulsively attack doors. 


Conan Exiles

Patch 15.2.2017

  • Rhinos should no longer try to walk through players 

Patch 15.2.2017

  • Emus now give less XP 

Patch 23.02.2017

  • Players can no longer use chairs to travel great distances 

Update 24

  • Imps, ostriches and other non-humanoids no longer go bonkers if you hit them with a truncheon 

Update 25

  • Seeing dead people can now lead to great rewards 

Update 28

  • Fixed a small issue where a player in some instances could walk underwater. 



Update 149

  • Bucket no longer hostile to peacekeepers 

Update 152

  • Pumpkins only have 1 season (instead of 7) 

August 28, 2014

  • Bald inmate digging grows hair bug fixed 



  • The game will no longer look for the square root of zero. 


  • Mice can no longer spawn in hell 


  • Red Stucco no longer spreads corruption. 


The Sims 4


  • Sims carving pumpkins or working at a woodworking table will no longer ignore Sims who die near them. 


  • Babies will no longer send text messages congratulating your Sims on their marriage, engagement, or pregnancy. 


  • Confident children will no longer get a whim to practice pick-up lines. 


  • Babies will no longer change skin tone when they are picked up. 


Don't Starve

January 29th 2013

  • Darts and poop won't magically accumulate at the world origin. 

October 1st 2013

  • You can no longer trade with sleeping pigs. 

November 19th 2013

  • You can properly deploy or murder captured butterflies 


Ark: Survival Evolved


  • Beers can no longer be eaten by Dinos 


The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion


  • Taking items from dead owned creatures is no longer a crime 


World of Warcraft


  • The quest NPC Khan Jehn no longer becomes confused and unresponsive 


  • Roast Raptor now has an more appropriate inventory sound 


  • Fixed an error where some characters appeared to be drinking while standing up 


  • Zapetta will no longer become confused about whether the zeppelin in Orgrimmar is arriving or leaving 


  • Yaaarrrr! now has a detailed tooltip 




  • Fixed : Dead or jailed people don't answer their phones 


  • Fixed : LAN Spoof progress graphic overflow 
  • Fixed : Time freezing and unclickable buttons on computers running for several weeks



July 10, 2001 

  • Reevaluated the values of the various fish fillets 


August 15, 2001 

  • The Giant Tree Flayer is now Large instead of Tiny 

December 6, 2001 

  • Fixed a bug that was preventing characters from being bald 


Two Worlds 2


  • Horse behaviour - improved 


Battlefield 1942


  • Bots do not jump in and out of vehicles anymore 


Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic


  • Dead party members will no longer show up later in the game. What with thembeing dead and all 


Black and White


  • The word "Death" no longer said when villagers die of old age
  • Creature doesn't become constipated if you punish him for pooing 


No One Lives Forever 2


  • Fixed problems with camera rotation after slipping on a banana 


Hitman: Codename 47

Patch 1 

  • Dancer in "Gunrunner's Paradise" is no longer confused by dead bodies 
DEFCON - Valve
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*Offer ends Friday at 10AM Pacific Time
Uplink - contact@rockpapershotgun.com (Alice O'Connor)

Introversion Software’s seminal hacking sim Uplink may be fifteen years old but it’s still one of the finest hacks ’em ups, Brendan will tell you. It’s now looking super-fresh too, thanks to the amazing makeover mod UplinkOS [official site]. Along with a new look, UplinkOS brings fab features like support for opening multiple windows at once, now draggable and with tabs. Fancy! We’ve mentioned UplinkOS before but now, after several months of beta, a final release has arrived. Here, look at this swish style: … [visit site to read more]

DEFCON - contact@rockpapershotgun.com (Alice O'Connor)

If you fancy a break from watching the crawl towards nuclear annihilation live on TV, you can now jack into virtual reality and watch it sped-up in Defcon VR [official site]. Introversion Software today launched the free VR doodad, which lets goggheads enter a virtual war room to spectate matches in the nuclear war RTS Defcon. Our Adam will tell you Defcon is one of the best strategy games, and I… don’t disagree but don’t have the stomach to play again. Watching wars with your chums in cyberspace seems deliciously wicked and fitting for something so awful. … [visit site to read more]

Feb 15, 2017
DEFCON - elDiablo
Introversion joins the VR party!
After Prison Architect, our most successful game is DEFCON - a nuclear war strategy game inspired by the 80s movie War games (If you've not seen it, so yourself a favour and check it out over the weekend)

DEFCON VR allows you to spectate DEFCON games in the comfort of your own virtual War Room. Join others and marvel at total global annihilation as nuclear missiles arc over the globe on their path to destruction. Have a look as Chris, Mark, and Finlay show off the glory of nuclear doom.


We're giving away a prototype on steam, but if there's enough interest we may decide to carry on and build a fully playable version of DEFCON in VR - lets us know what you think in the comments of the video.
Uplink - contact@rockpapershotgun.com (Brittany Vincent)

Introversion Software’s 2001 hackathon Uplink [official site] is one of the most enjoyable depictions of real-world hacking in the realm of gaming. If you love Mr. Robot as much as I do, you probably remember playing through this relic back when it came out. It also happens to be one of our best ten hacking, coding and computer games.

… [visit site to read more]

May 13, 2015
Why I Love

In Why I Love, PC Gamer writers pick an aspect of PC gaming that they love and write about why it's brilliant. Today, Phil explains why Uplink is the best depiction of hacking in gaming.

Films and TV shows have a patchy history when it comes to the accurate depiction of technology and computing. It's hard not to feel let down when a film like Inside Man uses invented over-the-top violence to prey on the worst assumptions of the gaming illiterate. It's hard not to roll your eyes when admittedly dumb shows spout streams of nonsense, safe in the knowledge that many viewers won't know any better. And that's just games. The more specialist the technical knowledge needed to understand a thing, the dumber its on-screen depiction seems. For instance, hacking.

But unrealistic depictions can be fun, too. Take the film Hackers, which I fully and unironically love. It's dumb, but in a way that lets everyone be in on the joke. It doesn't sneer like Swordfish; it celebrates. It invents a world of 3D operating systems and neon punks, and then works hard to make you want to be in that world. It helps that it was set in the '90s, and everything in the '90s was already ridiculous.

Uplink—the first game from Introversion Studios—creates a similar fantasy. You re a freelance hacker using a dial-up modem and an remote 8 gigaquad computer to work for a global organisation dedicated to cybercrime. To do so, you create long networks of connections and run various programs to break into a target server. It's absurd, but taps into the same feelings of excitement and subversiveness that are reason filmmakers keep unrealistically depicting hacking in the first place.

At their core these films are stories of a single person able to stand-up to and destroy an entire corporation. That same idea is at the heart of Uplink s campaign. It starts off small, asking you break into servers to delete specific files, but soon ramps up in scope. Once your skill rating is high enough you ll destroy research servers, track down rival hackers and frame innocent people for high-tech crimes. It all builds to a gloriously over-the-top technophobic finale, in which you're given the power to save or destroy the entire internet—Tumblr and all.

Uplink is great because it gets every aspect of this fantasy right. It's a tense sandbox of tools and possibilities that rewards initiative and punishes mistakes. It's a peerless lesson in how to make a game about hacking, and one I wish every maker of a hacking mini-game would learn from. Yes, it's unfair to expect a small section of an RPG or immersive sim to be as good as a game dedicated solely to hacking. I'm not saying these mini-games should have the same depth as Uplink, but there are some basic lessons that could be learned.

The most important lesson: tension. Too many hacking mini-games treat the hacking as a separate entity that's removed from the world of the game. Hack a shop in Bioshock, and the world stays frozen in place as you piss about with some pipe pieces. Break into one of Fallout 3's computers, and people politely wait as you play a word-based guessing game. This is pointless: hacking shouldn't be about the act, but the tension between the act and getting caught in it. (This applies to lockpicking, too. Automatic real-time lockpicking is inherently more tense than a convoluted mini-game in which the outside world ceases to exist.)

In Uplink, the tension is brilliantly realised through one of the game's most basic programs: the Trace Tracker. It emits beeps that mark the time remaining before a security system finds you. It starts out slowly, but as your window of opportunity diminishes it may as well double for a heart-rate monitor. The ramp up in tension it creates as you race to finish your objective in time is almost unbearable. Disconnecting with seconds to spare feels amazing.

Uplink's other stroke of genius is that it makes you click on and type things manually. It's such a basic idea: forcing you to use the real-world tools of mouse and keyboard, thus creating a difficulty curve that's directly based on how much pressure you're under. To break into a system, you have to juggle programs like the agonisingly slow password breaker, firewall bypasser, vocal analyser, proxy disabler and log deleter. That done, you still have to perform the task you've been hired for, whether it's typing in search queries or editing records. It's a race, and you'll only win if you perform every action to perfection.

That's what so many games get wrong about hacking. It needn't be complex, just frantic and demanding. Uplink has plenty of depth to its content, but the hacking systems themselves are relatively simple. You execute programs and perform actions. You manage your computer and search for information. You watch the timer and, at the last possible second, cut the connection. It's these basic actions, and the tension that bubbles under them, that makes Uplink the best example of silly sci-fi game hacking.

Darwinia - contact@rockpapershotgun.com (Alec Meer)

Have You Played? is an endless stream of game recommendations. One a day, every day of the year, perhaps for all time.>

Once the most-discussed game in the then-small indie world, Introversion’s offbeat RTS feels like a lifetime ago now. It’s a game about ushering scores of AI life around a half-retro, half-futuristic landscape, seeking to escape a digital apocalypse, and I suspect it was ahead of its time, at least in terms of audience appetite. … [visit site to read more]


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