YIKES : There's too many buttons, too much crazy ♥♥♥♥ going on, and the story makes everything worse by existing. If "boomer shooter" means "spaz out on your keyboard" to you, then eat your heart out.

ROCKS : This is quintessentially DOOM; it feels exactly like the game id Software would have made way back in 1993 if they'd had the technology.

YUP : I strongly recommend this game if you have a friend or three. Get into a rhythm and flex your teamwork muscles. If you're really, really weird, you might also like playing it solo.

NOT A GAME ABOUT MINING : Unlike SOME OTHER ROGUELIKES, every death feels like it was preventable; you know exactly what you did wrong. It's almost zen-like when you're intimately familiar with it.

SMASH : This game is cool as hell, but I'd probably like it more if I could ever ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ win. Items rarely have any synergy, and most damage seems unavoidable. Maybe it's my fault for playing solo?

NO : This could be fun, but it's mostly inhabited by twitchy adderall-infused preteens who have nothing better to do for 12 hours a day. As most competitive games are.

JOIN THE REGIMENT : It has potential to be fun with friends. Otherwise, it's a clan-infested nightmare where you can't achieve anything. Huge news for unemployed military larpers.

COME ON : Is this supposed to be funny? Did you ask an AI to write a parody of the western fantasy RPG genre? The comics I wrote in third grade were funnier. Even ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Borderlands has better jokes.

ABOMINABLE : It's a gacha game, what do you expect? These guys would charge you to wipe your own ass if they could. And it has all the gameplay depth of Tic-Tac-Toe.

BETTER OFF FALLING : I hope you like nothing, because you're going to be doing a lot of that. Waste of space.