A master thief creeps over cobbles in an early modern metropolis that splits the difference between Edinburgh, Glasgow and Liverpool. Lit by gaslamps that can’t quite dispel the industrial haze, they pass for a civilian - a rough one, admittedly, but not shady enough to cause an itch in the swordarm of any passing guard.

Until, that is, they take to the thieves’ highway - following the trajectory of their grappling hook upward to the rooftops, from which they can see the shape of the city, and the moon beyond. Up here, it’s a parallel world - the trees on street level answered by chimney stacks, and the distant hills echoed by the rise and fall of steep gables. “We’re super proud of these rooftops,” says Greg LoPiccolo. “It’s an amazing landscape that we put a lot of thought and effort into, and it’s a lot of fun to traverse.”

Back in 1998, LoPiccolo was the game director who saw Thief: The Dark Project to completion. Today - after an 18 year detour to Harmonix to lead projects like Guitar Hero and Rock Band, among other adventures - he’s the game director of Thick as Thieves. “It really is an opportunity to do something unique and cool and new, on the shoulders of this stuff that is now well-respected,” he says. “Thief has some legs, right? People still talk about it to some degree.”

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After a failure-riddled start, my attempt to turn S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 2’s mutants into beasts of war is finally bearing fruit. I’ve engineered a Bloodsucker attack that wiped out the worst of villains – someone who was mean to me – and I’ve progressed far enough to really open up the map, and with it, access to more of the Zone’s fiercest fleshwarps.

Also, rats. Buoyed by the successful Bloodsucker siccing, I’m back on the trail of some mysterious anomaly scanners, and word is I might find a lead inside a local maze of wrecked cars. It’s heavily guarded by some gangster types, but for once, I won’t have to dash off in search of some far-off muties and coax them back here using my neck as bait. Mercifully, a gaggle of overgrown rodents are already hopping around right outside the labyrinth’s entrance. I beckon them in like a bouncer on his last day, then sprint past the stunned gunmen, who can barely shoulder their rifles before being set upon by a pack of giant carnivorous hamsters.

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In more ways than one, today’s Total War: Warhammer 3 expansion marks a milestone for game director Rich Aldridge and his team at Creative Assembly. Omens Of Destruction’s three headline legendary lords each bring new campaigns and units for their respective factions, but it’s the fourth lord - a Khorne champion free to all players - that I imagine Aldridge will end up remembering the most fondly.

When Total War: Warhammer released back in 2016, it shipped with eight legendary lords - famous characters from Games Workshop’s fantasy setting that here act as faction leaders. The number grew steadily and, in terms of announcement order at least, today’s addition of Arbaal The Undefeated marks the series’ 100th. That's a hundred campaigns, a hundred joint efforts of game design, animation, art, writing and voice work.

Aldridge has never been shy about the team’s ambition for the series to eventually offer up each unit from every Fantasy Battle 6th edition army book ("The goal is to do everything, right?"). But ambition is one thing, and considering the fraught conditions at Creative Assembly and parent company Sega over the past few years, it’s not just the addition of the 100th lord that feels like something to celebrate. It’s taken time, effort, and a siesmic shift in update frequency, but Total War: Warhammer III is in the best place it's ever been.

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Today’s advent calendar game is already inside your head, for this is not a game you stop playing, merely one you step away from between rounds. Even after you quit, it lingers on the edge of your awareness like a muffled bassline. It glitters in the air around you like a cloud of spores. It cannot be denied. It can only be…

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When I were a lad, you’d open an advent calendar and get a piece of chocolate shaped like a bell with an aftertaste so rancid you’d wish you’d eaten the little cardboard window instead. And you’d bloody well make do, too. Not these days. Now, you get a squadron of tiny automata with drills for noses that burrow through your battle lines and utterly wreck your vulnerable missile launchers. Country’s gone to the tiny robot dogs, I tell you!

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London Gatwick Airport is a rare shade of brown, known to neither science nor art. A brown that doesn’t appear on the light spectrum. No easel contains it. It is a dusty brown, a damp brown, a hot and earthy brown that hums with the stinging malodour of disturbed ancient moss where once old forests stood. Descending into Gatwick’s cloying brown from 33,000 feet is like flying under and up Gandalf’s wretched cloak and landing in one of the several horrible little magic pouches he keeps by his balls.

Microsoft Flight Simulator 2024 captures Gatwick’s brown perfectly. Next to the stupefying natural beauty of Yosemite, the imposing imperial skyscrapers of the Manhattan skyline and the surging majesty of the Alpine peaks, this local rot-tinged patch of West Sussex is the most impressively realistic depiction of a place I have seen in a game.

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Today’s advent calendar pick is one of 2024’s finest games we missed. It troubles our dreams and waking moments alike. It mushrooms in our peripheral vision and drifts towards us as we batter out advent calendar posts, hoping we can finish writing and beat a tactical withdrawal to the kitchen before the accusatory phantom overwhelms us. It’s a game about sin and projectile patterns and llamas. It’s...

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Indiana Jones and the Great Circle isn’t just good. It’s excellent. If you’re excited about playing the game on launch day (or beyond) and want to get the best deal possible, then look no further.

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There’s an awful lot behind this door, lemme tell ya. Hours of adventure, of tension, of action, of sci-fi strangeness. It’ll be great. Unfortunately the door itself is bugged out so you’ll need to reload a quicksave or something to get it open.

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It's not just because he's a Nazi. It's because he's a smartass> Nazi. As the main antagonist in Indiana Jones And The Great Circle, Emmerich Voss vacates the archetypal armchair usually reserved for secondary fascist goons, so that he can goosestep straight into the big boy seat himself. He smiles with all the sleaze of right-hand-man Major Toht, the grubby gestapo who gets that right hand burned in Raiders of the Lost Ark. Yet he also engages in the pseudo-intellectual trash talk of the main archaeological rivals to Jones, like Rene Belloq or Walter Donovan. He is a hideous grab bag of all the things that make an instantly detestable villain in the series. But there's something else. Voss is so immediately and gutturally hateable because he resembles a type of racist encountered not in the 1930s, but one you've probably met today: the asshole you meet on the internet.

Warning: Here be spoilers.

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