That is the name of an actual videogame that exists.If you’re wondering why it has enough titles for roughly 60 games, it’s because Half Minute Hero‘s actually made up of, well, roughly 60 games. They don’t, however, take half a life to finish, because each one is – yes – 30 seconds long. And really, what else can you even do in 30 seconds? Water a plant? Pet a cat? Wait precisely that long for your coffee to cool and then still burn yourself anyway? No thanks. I think I’ll just save the entire world> instead. Or maybe eat a cookie. Hm, this is a dilemma.

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Modding’s been a bit of a sore spot for Total War fans in recent times, but Creative Assembly – to its credit – has spent the past few months fixing up that rather glaring crack in its series’ armor. And certainly, Total War: Shogun 2‘s dedicated (and not-entirely-uninituitive) map editor was a nice start, but people demanded more. More breadth, more tools, more tiny virtual ant men throwing away their tiny virtual ant lives in the name of history>. So Creative Assembly listened. Specifically, Shogun 2′s now packing full Steam Workshop support, some seriously upgraded map-making tools, and a brand new “Assembly Kit.” Find out about all the new ways you can make sweet, sweet war to your friends after the break.

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Good news! Better news! BEST NEWS. TaleWorlds is finally pregnant with another Mount-&-Blade-shaped baby, and your hopes and dreams are the father. This is no With Fire and Sword-style spin-off, either. Or at least, that’s what the number two (and in Roman numerals, no less – making it the two-est two of them all) suggests. Unfortunately, I say “suggests” because there’s really not much else to say. All we have right now is a full title – Mount & Blade II: Bannerlord – a brief description, and a trailer that seems determined to abandon its family lineage and become a Powerpoint Presentation.

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Starbreeze likes dark things. Once upon a time, it put out the pitch black Chronicles of Riddick and, er, The Darkness – among others. (It also helmed the recent Syndicate reboot, but we don’t talk about that.) Its next big project, then, comes as quite the change of pace. To my knowledge, Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons is almost entirely bereft of hyper-violent space prison shankings or entrail-devouring demon tentacles. Instead, it’s a fantasy to-do about… well, pretty much everything’s in the title. Brothers (who are also sons) set out to cure their deathly ill father (who is presumably also someone’s son, and maybe someone else’s brother). Also, Swedish filmmaker Josef Fares is involved. Catch a quick peek after the break.

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Over the weekend, I attended Fantastic Arcade, an indie-focused gaming show in Austin, Texas. It was – as is often the case with these things – full of passion, creativity, and the guy who played that one kid in Dazed and Confused. You’ll be hearing tons more about it soon. First, though, we’ll look at what was perhaps the most incongruous moment of the event: a Valve panel. Steam Greenlight, of course, has had some pretty serious ups and downs since launching, and this panel gave the very people who are fighting to set up shop on the ubiquitous storefront a chance to voice their complaints directly. Here’s how it all went down.  >

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It’s a strange thing, bearing witness to the end of a world. When the final voices of Star Wars: Galaxies voices cried out and were suddenly silenced, I was oddly moved by the documentation of the event, even though I’d never played the game and am the only person on the internet who doesn’t have any particular feelings about Star Wars*. The end of City of Heroes may well create similar scenes, at once absurd and poignant, and Paragon have now shared a list of the LAST EVENTS IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD. One of them is a Double XP event, which seems kind of like finally getting a gym membership just as the countdown to Armageddon begins. Full list of events and timings below.

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McPixel has exploded onto Steam and is the first game to reach Valve’s storefront through the Greenlight process. There’s a feature about the indies and Steam coming later, courtesy of Nathan who has been visiting Fantastic Arcade where he was witness to a Valve panel all about Greenlight. I didn’t go to Fantastic Arcade but I did wake up at 7.30 this morning, endure the difficult commute from my bed to my computer and put on my Serious Journalist Hat. Primed and ready, I sent a list of very important and serious questions to Sos Sosowski about being the Armstrong of indies: the first man on Greenlight.

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Lucius arrives on the 26th of October, just in time to be played as you close the curtains and ignore trick or treaters on Halloween. It’s a 3D adventure inspired by horror classic The Omen, and it’s been developed by three-man Helsinki-based, Shiver Games. But are spines chilled? Are hairs raised? Most importantly: are brains teased? Having played an early copy of the game I feel obliged to tell you Wot I Think.>

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When something is made of the making of music, there’s not a great deal a few words on a screen can do to describe it accurately. Skylight randomly generates a series of tiles, which are stepping stones across the sky and into the clouds. Each block makes a sound, the robot who bounces across them to find his way home is like Tom Hanks dancing on a piano in a department store, except lost and sad rather than warped out of shape by the sinister powers of Zoltar. When you find the flow, controlling momentum and creating the skeleton of a melody, Skylight shimmers>. Trailer below, demo here, full version available for $2.50.

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A month ago, The Behemoth announced that – after a mere four years – its co-op bashathon for the ages, Castle Crashers, would finally be getting a PC port. Naturally, I hurled an Xbox (not mine, mind you; that’d be wasteful!) out a window in glee, only to cease my celebratory smashing when I noticed a listed release date of “unknown.” Now, though, I can finally resume breaking things, because Castle Crashers has hit Steam.

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