The NFL is kicking off (checks watch) oh, about nowish. Time for a new season of wins and losses, touchdowns and fumbles, and nonstop clichés from analysts and commentators. One such word is "clutch," a word that seems to define a top performer in a pinch, but has no real objective measure.

It's an attribute in Madden NFL 13, however, and one of the rarest, belonging to only 38 players as the season gets underway. (Others can be made "clutch" through the weekly roster update.) Sure, Eli Manning, Calvin Johnson and Marshawn Lynch are considered "clutch" players, almost by acclamation, but what does that get you in Madden? As the game's ratings czar, Donny Moore, explained it to ESPN:
• If a team trails by 8 or fewer points, or is tied, in the final two minutes of regulation or in overtime, the clutch trait kicks in.

• Clutch quarterbacks see an attribute boost for themselves and all of the offensive line.

• Clutch running backs, receivers and tight ends get a boost only for themselves.

• Clutch kickers see a boost in accuracy and power, but the margin must be 3 points or fewer in the final two minutes of the game. The boost also kicks in only if it's fourth down, unless it's under 10 seconds left in the game.

• On defense, clutch only matters for defensive backs and linebackers, and their side must be within one possession, winning or losing, in the final two minutes or overtime.

• Clutch does not affect punting. There are no clutch punters. God, why would you suggest such a thing

How'd they decide who was clutch? Well, Moore used the test Justice Potter Stewart famously applied to porn. He knows it when he sees it.

As for the attribute boosts, quarterbacks get increased ball carrying, play action, throw accuracy and throw-on-run attributes, plus awareness, which means basically nothing if you are controlling the quarterback. The offensive line gets a "MAJOR" boost to pass blocking, so think about that as you decide whether or not to mix in a run.

Running backs get boosts to ball carrying and catching, plus pass block and stamina; receivers and tight end get boosts to spectacular catch, catching, catch in traffic—you get the idea. For more on what gets goosed and who gets it thanks to being "clutch," see the link.

Breaking down clutch rating in 'Madden 13' [ESPN]

This week Konami went up-down-left-right-WTF-start when it made you a PlayStation Home offer you couldn't refuse—horse heads. For, like, no discernible reason other than it's some crap you can slap on your Home avatar. Lacking any good purpose, we're going to ask you to invent one, in this week's Kotaku 'Shop Contest.

Source Image: Konami Horse Heads

Feel free to find horse heads from anywhere else you can dredge them up (nice image, eh?) because it's not like Konami went with any stylized horse pictures, they just straight up used something that looks like a mask from a Roman orgy or something. We'll probably get a lot of Godfather jokes, but I'm sure there are more than enough creative 'shoppers to bring the funny here.

Remember, you have to post submissions in the new forum for the Kotaku 'Shop Contest. I know it's not as fun as seeing everyone's creations underneath this post, but this way automatically displays them in chronological order, which everyone seems to prefer.

Because of this, comments are disabled in this post to avoid confusion. You must visit the 'Shop Contest Forum to participate or to see this week's subissions. After you create your 'Shop, you'll need to post it there. Here are the rest of the guidelines for doing so.

1. Go to the 'Shop Contest Forum
2. Click "Add Image" in the upper right above the comment window.
3. Click "Upload an Image Instead." Then click the "Choose File" button. Browse your desktop, find the image, and click "open."
4. If you prefer, you can upload the 'Shop to a free image hosting service. I suggest imgur. Then click "Add image" in the upper right above the comment window. Paste the image URL into the field that says "Image URL."
5. You can add editorial commentary if you want, but then just hit submit and your image will load. If it doesn't, paste the image URL as a comment.
6. This is important: Keep your image size under 1 MB. If you're still having trouble uploading the image, try to keep its longest dimension (horizontal or vertical) under 1000 pixels.

All set? Great. Now, Gentlemen, start your 'shopping!

The mistaken exclusion of South Alabama, a newcomer to college football's top division this year, from NCAA Football 13 left EA Sports wiping a crateful of egg from its face back in June. Both USA and the embarrassed label would have to stew for another year, until NCAA 14, before the problem could be solved. For whatever it was worth, EA Sports' NCAA team vowed to give South Alabama the red-carpet treatment.

South Alabama fans are reporting that EA Sports has done its community service. That's what it sounds like when a team of environmental artists spend 12 hours at the stadium making it shine—for use in next year's game. Thunder Jags, a site following USA athletics, said two artists, Gregory Palinkas and Dan Goodman, photographed and scanned Ladd-Peebles Stadium's interior and exterior to make sure every detail—"down to the gravel," noted Palinkas—comes to life in NCAA 14.

Thunder Jags gleefully notes this sort of treatment is only shown to the power elite of college football, which South Alabama is far from, only two games into its debut Division I-A season.

It didn't stop there. Two others joined the scan crew to film the school's costumed mascot and discuss the team's playbook with the coaching staff, to make sure any signature plays go into South Alabama's playbook next year.

"We could not have been any more embarrassed and saddened that it happen," producer Ben Haumiller told Thunder Jags. "So that was one of the things where we wanted to make it right, and how this trip became involved, getting everything we possibly can get to represent South Alabama, so when they do make their debut, it's the right debut. It's not just, yes, we added them, it's yeah, here they are, and this is everything about them."

Haumiller and company were due to return to the stadium on Saturday to capture crowd noise, cheerleaders and the team's runout. They picked a good time to do it; South Alabama won its first game of the season.

EA Sports Is Making Good On Their Promise [Thunder Jags. h/t Bubba P.]

Welcome to your Sunday read of the week's best in web comics. Make sure to click on the expand button in the bottom right to enlarge each comic.

Virtual Shackles by Jeremy Vinar and Mike Fahmie published Sept. 3.—Read more of Virtual Shackles
Awkward Zombie by Katie Tiedrich published Sept. 3.—Read more of Awkward Zombie
Nerf NOW!! by Josué Pereira published Sept. 5.—Read more of Nerf NOW!!
Penny Arcade by Jerry Holkins and Mike Krahulik published Sept. 3.—Read more of Penny Arcade
Manly Guys Doing Manly Things by Kelly Turnbull published Sept. 3.—Read more of Manly Guys Doing Manly Things
Brawl In The Family by Matthew Taranto published Sept. 4.—Read more of Brawl In The Family
Another Videogame Webcomic by Phil Chan and Joe Dunn published Sept. 7.—Read more of Another Videogame Webcomic
ActionTrip by Borislav Grabovic and Ure Paul published Sept. 3.—Read more of ActionTrip
Legacy Control by Javis Ray published Sept. 7.—Read more of Legacy Control

The New York Times has a great feature on Valve and some of the things they've been up to recently, including these crazy gaming goggles.

Here's how they describe the device:

Every way I look, the scene shifts, the battle unfolds. I have a crazy contraption strapped to my head: a boxy set of goggles that looks like a 22nd-century version of a View-Master. It immerses me in a virtual world. I whirl one way and see zombies preparing to snack on my flesh. I turn another and wonder what fresh hell awaits.

...

Now Valve executives think they may be onto the next big thing in games: wearable computing. The goggles I'm wearing - reminiscent of the ones Google recently unveiled to much hoopla - could unlock new game-playing opportunities. This technology could let players lose themselves inside a virtual reality and, eventually, blend games with their views of the physical world.

The Times also mentions that Valve's Big Picture mode, a new interface that adapts Steam for use on televisions, will enter beta this Monday. We'll have more details on Steam's new television mode Monday morning.

Game Maker Without a Rule Book [NY Times]

There are still no full-fledged Metroid games on the horizon, but Nintendo's top sci-fi series will at least be featured in one the main attractions of Wii U launch game Nintendo Land.

The newest issue of Game Informer reveals that the collection of HD Nintendo-themed mini-games will include Metroid Blast, a fleshed out version of the superb E3 2011 Wii U tech demo Battle Mii.

Like the other games in Nintendo Land, Metroid Blast. is designed to demonstrate gameplay that uses distinct features of the upcoming Wii U hardware. For this one, one player holds the Wii U GamePad (the big controller with the 6" screen) and pilots Metroid heroine Samus' spaceship, tilting the controller to fly. As many as four rival players control Miis wearing Samus' armor and use Wii Remotes to run around and try to shoot the spaceship player down. The on-foot players watch the action on the TV in splitscreen; the spaceship player observes the same battlefield on the GamePad's screen and can even physically move away from the TV to play their part. For the on-foot players, Metroid Blast is a third-person arena shooter. For the spaceship player, this is an aerial combat game.

As complex as it all of this reads, it played marvelously in June of 2011 and presumably is only more polished now. Game Informer's writer mentions a very cool detail for Metroid fans: one of the mode's maps "the lava-filled Norfair map ... [has] a massive, mechanical Kraid that players can ascend using their grapple beams."

The magazine also reveals a new Nintendo Land mini-game based on Nintendo classic Balloon Fight. This one pushes players to use the GamePad's stylus to guide floating Miis through dangerous mazes.

Nintendo Land will feature a dozen mini-games, all of them themed to well known Nintendo titles. We at Kotaku have played a bunch, including modes that riff on Luigi's Mansion, Animal Crossing, Zelda and Donkey Kong. The game is connected by a theme park hub that players can populate with lots of Nintendo-themed unlockables (including Samus' ship).

Nintendo Land is supposed to be a showpiece for the Wii U and may even be packed in with the console. We will probably find out for sure on September 13, when Nintendo hosts an all-day Wii U event. We will be there and tell you all the news.

Game Informer—October 2012 [Game Informer]

There were a lot of one-hit wonders in the 1980s, but David Crane isn't one of them. The Activision programmer was behind Decathlon for the Atari 2600, Ghostbusters, one of the first great film-to-game adaptations on PC, and later, A Boy and His Blob. But he'll forever be known as Pitfall!'s creator, almost typecast as such.

Pitfall! in many regards was the first breakout original console game, something that didn't depend on the popularity of an arcade title and a successful port to the underpowered machines of the day. It was such a mainstream hit that it became one of the inaugural segments in the Saturday Supercade cartoon lineup, and one of the first console-only games to be adapted into another medium.

But it's come at a cost. Crane told Gamasutra it was a little like being a child actor, known for his first role and not taken seriously in other work. He felt pressured to "go back to the jungle" for an encore, drafting a concept for a 2D platformer calling on Pitfall!'s motifs. Problem is, he asked for $900,000 through Kickstarter to make it, and is nowhere close to reaching that total.

Convinced that the world wanted him to "go back to the jungle" and make another game like Pitfall!, Crane put together a small, independent team, drafted up a partial design for a new 2D platformer that brings to mind the old days but utilizes modern day technology (it's being made in Unity), and launched a Kickstarter campaign seeking $900,000.

"Everyone turned against me as soon as they saw [the price]," Crane told Gamasutra. ""I had people telling me that I was ruining Kickstarter for indie developers by asking for that amount of money."

It's not looking good for Crane. With 6 days to go, the project has raised only $22,000. "It's just amazing how there is no vision of what Kickstarter is supposed to be," he said. "People won't let go of what they think it is."

Living in Pitfall's Shadow [Gamasutra]

NBA 2K has a great track record of indulging its players' shoe fetishes, but according to IGN, it's going even further in NBA 2K13.

NBA 2K13 will add deeper customization options for your created player's footwear, but the big new feature is its integration with the NikeID website. This means not only can you share your creations with other users of that site, you can even order them if you want to cosplay your My Player.

Last year the game added the means to swap colors and adjust some details on current NikeID shoes, but not custom-build their own wholesale. There's no mention of what a custom pair of NBA-quality shoes will run, but my guess is it's not cheap. Still, what better way to memorialize your virtual run to a hall-of-fame career.

NBA 2K13 Has Everything and the Kitchen Sink [IGN]

The City of Heroes community has called for a massive demonstration at 5 p.m. EDT in Atlas Park to protest the MMO's shutdown.

[Update] But apparently it's already begun. That image [h/t mrKetch] shows hundreds now jamming city hall, and reports say the gathering already is large enough to bring down servers.

[Second Update] With the protest underway, reader LeandroTLZ reports that there are 31 instances of Atlas Park, 30 of them completely full, meaning at least 2,500 players are now participating in this demonstration.

[Third Update] The City of Heroes community asked Kotaku to change the headline of this item and note that this was organized as a show of support called "The Unity Rally," with participants asked not to use emotes like protest signs or angry speech. While torches were visible, which some took as the sign of a mob, it was intended as a vigil. The rally was not intended to be a denial-of-service protest.

The biggest thing Dark Souls (and spiritual ancestor Demon's Souls) has going for it is that it's hard as shit. Suffering through countless deaths to the end is a serious badge of honor. So when the series' director said earlier this week "I am thinking about whether I should prepare another difficulty that everyone can complete," plenty of people flipped the hell out at the idea of Dark Souls getting an "easy mode."

Well, now Namco's saying something was lost in the translation of Hidetaka Miyazaki's comments. Namco, the game's publisher, got on the batphone with London's Metro, which originally reported the remarks, to say they were mistranslated.

Namco says Miyazaki's actual comments should have read that "I am thinking about how to make everyone complete the game while maintaining the current difficulty and carefully send all gamers the messages behind it."

Metro replied that: "We're not sure we believe it was a translation error, but if the uproar from fans has been enough to convince Miyazaki that an easy mode is a bad idea then we'd be happy to think we helped convince him."

Miyazaki backtracks over Dark Souls difficultly level [Metro.co.uk]