A marketing research firm found that 17 percent of social gamers - Farmville, Mafia Wars and the like - consider themselves "addicted," though it's not clear if they say that regretfully or as a lighthearted self-description.

Anyway, when the likes of Lightspeed Research (a global firm) delves into the latest it-topic in social media and gaming, it's usually doing so to point out the boatloads of money to be made from it - especially with their expert analysis. So don't take this as the findings of a medical journal. The survey said that two-thirds of respondents play one to two social games five days a week, about a third of all respondents do so daily, and the 55 to 64 age range plays more frequently than 18-34 year olds. Draw your own conclusions as to why.

Most notably, 14 percent of all surveyed said they've spent money on social games, either by purchasing in-game currency, items or whatever. That sounds small - except it's a direct revenue conversion rate of 14 percent for what is basically a big clickable ad, which is tantalizing. And 33 percent said they've done things like clicked on ads or signed up for offers to get free in-game rewards, which is pretty healthy from an advertising perspective.

It's Game On for Social Networkers [Lightspeed Research]

Earlier this week, Kevin Butler, Sony's (fake) V.P. o'snark, took a dig at Kinect in the latest TV commercial for PlayStation Move. Now there's an entire site up implying that buttons in motion control result in games that "don't suck."

Yaybuttons.com drives home the point by making you click a button 48 times to get to the end of the spiel, definitely written in a Butler-esque tone of voice. But, directly slamming Kinect's you-are-the-controller design, Sony calls buttons important - "Not like 'save the whales important,' more like 'not play games that suck' important.'"

Pause buttons are important, the site says. What about spoken commands? "There's no way that could backfire," it points out. Further, with buttons "game developers can make them do anything! That means games with buttons are awesome, too." Burrrrrrn.

OK, Sony, we get it. Buttons are useful to motion control gaming. We've known that for about, oh, three years.

Yay Buttons [Site]

Super Meat Boy Avatar T-shirt, as confirmed by the game's official Twitter early this morning. The game releases on Oct. 20 over Xbox Live. Via Destructoid.

That student who was scheming to turn the student center at Columbia University into the girder level of Donkey Kong ended up like the dog who caught the car. The scheme's been called off, and all donations have been refunded.

Well, they were never collected in the first place. The site where he was organizing the project records a donation and only charges if a funding level is reached. But "AronSora," the Columbia student who hatched the idea, wrote me earlier today to say he was calling it all off. A message later sent out to all donors explained why:

It's starting to get too risky and I don't have to balls to pull it off. I'm also worried that any barrels would scratch up the glass ramps, but they have to be heavy enough to roll; this maybe impossible. I also realized that Donkey Kong Could get injured by lifting the barrels, at 20 pounds each, over his head. By canceling this project, all your pledges should be returned to you. Thank you all for being far more epic than I am and reminding me how amazing teh intertubes are. Maybe it will happen one day, but I can't do it in a safe, non damaging stealthy way.

Given that this was outed on the Internet well in advance of its execution date, I don't think there was any hope of AronSora pulling this off stealthily. I'd also like to see how he'd stealthily load barrels to the top of Lerner Hall with a guy dressed in a Donkey Kong suit.

I think the only course of action now is to take this before Columbia's student activities authority, sign all the proper paperwork, and do the whole thing as a fundraiser. My $40 pledge for materials still stands, and I'll toss another $60 on that to the cause.

A friend visiting me recently is a lifelong NHL fan with season tickets to the San Jose Sharks. He doesn't play video games, but he was intrigued when he saw NHL 11 on my desk, a couple days before release.

"Oh, wow, you got this?" he said. "What's that like? Can I play it?"

"Sure," I said, opening the case and handing him the manual. "There are the controls."

The 17-page manual devotes four pages to the controls. After three minutes Scott uttered two words that communicated he'd given up on the idea.

"Don't feel bad," I said. "I barely know how to play it either."

That's an uncomfortable statement to make when you're expected to review this game. (It also explains why you probably won't be seeing one for another week.) Especially given that EA Sports' NHL title is the most consistently acclaimed sports title over at least the past five years.

But if both of us had picked up the controllers - well, I probably would have won. But it wouldn't have looked a thing like hockey, despite NHL 11 being a game that does one of the best jobs of simulating its sport.

On one end, I represent stick skills, adaptability and familiarity with a controller, things that can be educated by an in-game tutorial. But I have zero knowledge of the game, never played it, didn't watch it with my father or anyone explaining it to me, and growing up in the South well before the NHL pushed into the area, I identified with no team and followed no players.

Scott brings an innate understanding of how the game is played, the position responsibilities and strengths, the coaching and shift-change strategy. But having last played video game hockey with Blades of Steel there's no way he's going to go from a D-pad and two buttons to an Xbox 360 controller, without taking every tutorial and suffering a dozen losses. On rookie.

Together, we represent both halves of why sports games are the most difficult genre to play in all of video gaming.

Not "one of the most." The most.

It's amusing to consider, because for what we're simulating in real life, I'm certain there are a lot more soldiers who can play football than there are linebackers who are trained to stay alive in combat.

The deepening complexity of sports video games is more than tolerable, its marketable, because millions of sports fans have a deep, first-hand association with the sport in question, if not as players then at least as lifelong fans. Unfortunately, it's also a prerequisite.

There is no such prerequisite in a shooter. Mafia II's instruction manual is two pages: Here's how to kill someone before he kills you, basically. Part of that has to do with the lawless context of the game. But it's also because, unlike the subtleties of defending someone in basketball, there are few gamers out there familiar with the subtleties of being a mafioso, and certainly not enough demanding simulation-quality organized crime gaming.

Analysts have asserted that sports gamers are not buying more sports games, but they are spending more money on a single game. The economy may be a big part of that, but it's only a part of it, I think. As features and different contextual control sets are are added and - especially - as multiplayer communities mature and become more competitive, fans may find themselves without the time or the wherewithal to keep up in the sports they follow more casually than their favorite.

Sports games that try to simplify themselves typically get brushed off as babying the product for people who don't have sports fan bonafides. Let's not be so quick to judge things that way. These games may be simplifying themselves to be more accessible to hardcore sports fans who, lacking exposure, can't yet make that mental connection between what they want their player or team to do and how to execute it on the controller.

"Doesn't this thing have training wheels?" Scott asked. When your game is so complex you need training wheels for the hardcore, that's a tough damn video game.

"Not really," I said.

"Well what the hell is this thing?" he held up the stick from NHL Slapshot - EA Sports' Wii title that still features simulation hockey, just with fewer controls on a hockey stick peripheral. Through a shipping mixup I got two sticks. I showed Scott the commands - pass like this, shoot like this, hit like this. He kicked my ass 7-1.

Stick Jockey is Kotaku's column on sports video games. It appears Saturdays at 2 p.m. U.S. Mountain time.

A Florida woman swiped and pawned her roommate's console, and when the cops came over to ask questions, they noticed a "large white chemical cloud" wafting out of the house. Better living through chemistry!

Today's fun-filled crime report comes from St. Johns County, Fla. (the greater Jacksonville area). Cops say a 36-year-old woman sneaked into her 24-year-old roommate's room, nabbed an Xbox and two controllers, and gave it to "an unidentified man to pawn," because of course, original Xboxes command top dollar.

The roommate evidently notices small details such as a missing video game console and called the fuzz. When the law showed up, they noticed the chem cloud and cleared the house while investigators crawled around it in space suits like the end of E.T.

The woman's been charged with a bunch of drug related counts, plus grand theft for the Xbox, and she's in the slammer on $16,000 bond. No word about the roommate, but damn, if she's cooking crank on the premises, wonder why he didn't call the law on her before she stole his console.

Deputies Discover Meth Lab On Barcelona Avenue [The St. Augustine Record via Game Politics. Image by The St. Augustine Record]

So there was this guy, and he bought a Majora's Mask cartridge from a creepy old guy, and it had wicked scary glitches in it, like Link would burst into flame while the Song of Healing played backward, and ...

Someone posting to 4chan's /x/ board (its paranormal forum) has concocted a whale of creepy urban myth that lacks only a campfire, flashlights under the face, and someone's cousin's best friend's stepbrother. It is long, but the gist of it is that the teller encounters a creepy old man, who gives him a strange, blank Nintendo 64 cartridge with "MAJORA" sharpied on it. He takes it home, plays it, and deletes a gamesave marked BEN.

Very strange, very threatening things then start happening, and while I think it's nothing more than a ghost story, it's very, very well written. It'll have you on the edge of your seat, grabbing your monitor and screaming "JUST TURN THE GODDAMN N64 OFF!!!!" And it even comes with three videos, attached below.

The entire story may be read here (via Joystiq). I expect to see some expert damn mythbusting in our comments - or maybe, maybe the haunting is real ...

Haunted Majora's Mask Cartridge [Zelda Informer]

Dennis Dixon is Pittsburgh's starting quarterback tomorrow while Ben Roethlisberger begins serving a four-game suspension. What if neither of them were under center? What if it was the punter?

Kotaku reader TheBobby is a pretty strong Madden player. Not a Steeler fan, per se, he decided to test how good the Steelers would be sans Roethlisberger. With Dixon on All-Madden, he smoked Cleveland 52-0.

"One thing led to another and I challenged myself to beat the Browns with the punter and kicker as my only two QB options," TheBobby writes. That meant punter Daniel Sepulveda played the first half, and kicker Jeff Reed took snaps in the second.

With Sepulveda, the Steelers raced out to a 21-0 first half lead. Sepulveda had three touchdown passes, plus four carries for a mind-blowing 73 yards, equalling Rashard Mendenhall's output for the day.

Reed completed half his passes for 108 yards and one TD, but he also threw a pick-six interception and fumbled inside Pittsburgh territory setting up a short field TD. Still, TheBobby held on for a 28-21 victory.

So there you go. I don't know if that means the Steelers will be just fine without Roethlisberger. But it's scientific proof the Browns are for shit.

Here's the box score!

Remember, all you have to do to get yourself featured in Box Scores' Game of the Week is take a picture of whatever you've been playing - crappy cell picture will do - write up a couple sentences about why it was so compelling, and email it to me, owenATkotakuDOTcom, with "Box Scores" in the subject header.

Now the Kotaku Sports open thread commences with the sports TV schedule for today and tomorrow. All times are U.S. Eastern.

• NFL
  The NFL's opening week has at long last arrived. Check local listings, but key 1 p.m. games tomorrow are the Colts at the Texans, Falcons at Steelers and Bengals at Patriots. Green Bay at Philadelphia is 4:15. The night's national matchup is Cowboys at Redskins on NBC.
  
  Monday night is a doubleheader on ESPN; Ravens at Jets, followed by Chargers at the Chefs. 7 and 10:15 p.m.
• 
  
• College Football
  Another full schedule awaits us today. Key games include Michigan at Notre Dame on NBC, 3:30 p.m.; Miami at Ohio State on ESPN at 3:40, Florida State at Oklahoma at 3:30 p.m. Penn State at Alabama on ESPN at 7; Oregon at Tennessee on ESPN2 at 7; and Stanford at UCLA wrapping things up at 10:30 on ESPN.
• 
  
• Basketball
  The semifinals of the FIBA World Championships are today; Serbia vs. Turkey tipped off an hour ago on ESPN Classic; the U.S. and Lithuania follow that up at 2:30 p.m. Tomorrow, the semifinal winners meet in the championship match at 2:30 p.m. on ESPN
• 
  
• Tennis
  My Dad's a USTA lines umpire, and he got held over at least through Saturday, so maybe you'll see him on the court today. He's also 6 out of 7 against the Hawkeye on replay challenges (and the one he missed, the point didn't have to be replayed.) The mens semis started an hour ago on CBS. The women's final is tonight at 8. Tomorrow, the men's final is at 4 p.m. on CBS.
• 
  
• Baseball
  Philadelphia and Atlanta, separated by one game in the NL East, account for two in Fox's national package today. The Phils are at the Mets, the Braves host the Cardinals (five back in the central). West coasters get a sick-man matchup, the Angels (10 games back) at the Mariners (potential 100-game losers). Check local listings, Fox at 4 p.m. Tonight the Royals are atthe White Sox on WGN, 7 p.m.
  
  Tomorrow, it's Cubs at Brewers on WGN at 2 and the Yankees at Rangers on TBS at 3. The nightcap is St. Louis at Atlanta on ESPN, 8 p.m. Congratulations to everyone for steadfastly avoiding the only head-to-head matchup of first and second place division rivals, the Padres and Giants, separated by a game entering Friday.
• 
  
• Motorsports
  The Air Guard 400 from Richmond International Raceway runs tonight at 7:30 on ABC. It's the final race before the 10-race Chase for the Cup playoff begins next week. Tomorrow, the Italian Grand Prix is on Speed network at 7:30 a.m.
• 
  
• Soccer
  Just noting that ESPN2 had West Ham vs. Chelsea this morning, but the match is likely over, or close to it, by now.
• 
  

Remember, you may send Game of the Week nominations to owenATkotakuDOTcom, and flag it "Box Scores" in the subject header. Please include your commenter handle for proper credit.

Top image via Steelers.com

Mafia II's got some issues, but give the devil its due, it's got some nudity in it. Hot Blooded Gaming, to my knowledge, is the first to round up and gallerize all 50 of its collectible Playboy centerfolds.

A collection guide on GameFAQs has been complete since Sept. 2 and lists where you can find the 'folds, as well as identifying the women by name and month of appearance. HBG's roundup is definitely nsfw, though an age-gate will ask you if you're 18 before allowing you to proceed. As we've seen on South Park, those under age 18 always answer this truthfully.

For those curious, here's a list of all Playmates appearing in the game, in their chronological order. This order differs from the one in which you're able to collect them.

• Playmate 1: Lari Laine - Miss May 1958
• Playmate 2: Elaine Reynolds - Miss October 1959
• Playmate 3: Ellen Stratton - Miss December 1959
• Playmate 4: Sally Sarell - Miss March 1960
• Playmate 5: Linda Gamble - Miss April 1960
• Playmate 6: Ann Davis - Miss September 1960
• Playmate 7: Connie Cooper - Miss January 1961
• Playmate 8: Tonya Crews - Miss March 1961
• Playmate 9: Dianne Danford - Miss November 1961
• Playmate 10: Kari Knudsen - Miss March 1962
• Playmate 11: Marya Carter - Miss May 1962
• Playmate 12: Merissa Mathes - Miss June 1962
• Playmate 13: Jan Roberts - Miss August 1962
• Playmate 14: Mickey Winters - Miss September 1962
• Playmate 15: Laura Young - Miss October 1962
• Playmate 16: Toni Ann Thomas - Miss February 1963
• Playmate 17: Sharon Cintron - Miss May 1963
• Playmate 18: Connie Mason - Miss June 1963
• Playmate 19: Phyllis Sherwood - Miss August 1963
• Playmate 20: Victoria Valentino - Miss September 1963
• Playmate 21: Terre Tucker - Miss November 1963
• Playmate 22: Nancy Jo Hooper - Miss February 1964
• Playmate 23: Melba Ogle - Miss July 1964
• Playmate 24: China Lee - Miss August 1964
• Playmate 25: Astrid Schulz - Miss September 1964
• Playmate 26: Rosemarie Hillcrest - Miss October 1964
• Playmate 27: Jo Collins - Miss December 1964
• Playmate 28: Sally Duberson - Miss January 1965
• Playmate 29: Sue Williams - Miss April 1965
• Playmate 30: Maria McBane - Miss May 1965
• Playmate 31: Gay Collier - Miss July 1965
• Playmate 32: Allison Parks - Miss October 1965
• Playmate 33: Pat Russo - Miss November 1965
• Playmate 34: Dina Williams - Miss December 1965
• Playmate 35: Melinda Windsor - Miss February 1966
• Playmate 36: Priscilla Wright - Miss March 1966
• Playmate 37: Dolly Read - Miss May 1966
• Playmate 38: Kelly Burke - Miss June 1966
• Playmate 39: Tish Howard - Miss July 1966
• Playmate 40: Susan Denberg - Miss August 1966
• Playmate 41: Lisa Baker - Miss November 1966
• Playmate 42: Fran Gerard - Miss March 1967
• Playmate 43: Gwen Wong - Miss April 1967
• Playmate 44: Joey Gibson - Miss June 1967
• Playmate 45: Dede Lind - Miss August 1967
• Playmate 46: Angela Dorian - Miss September 1967
• Playmate 47: Reagan Wilson - Miss October 1967
• Playmate 48: Kaya Christian - Miss November 1967
• Playmate 49: Lynn Winchell - Miss December 1967
• Playmate 50: Elizabeth Jordan - Miss May 1968

All 50 Mafia 2 Playboy Pictures Uncensored [Hot Blooded Gaming]

Son, your ego is writing coupons your body can't cash. You've been busted, you lost your qualifications as section leader three times, with a history of high speed passes over five air control towers, and one admiral's daughter!

Hardware

• Playstation Move Starter Bundle (controller, camera, Sports Champions game) is $94.99 from Buy.com through Sunday. Elsewhere it's $99.99. [Dealzon]

• The new 4GB Xbox 360 console is $169.99 from Dell through Sunday. Next best is $199. [Dealzon]

• Dell continues to offer the Wii Summer 2010 Bundle (black) with Wii Sports Resort & MotionPlus for $174.99. That's $5 cheaper than the normal sale price and $25 cheaper anywhere else. [LogicBuy]

• If you prefer the white design, Dell has the it in the Wii Summer 2010 Bundle with Wii Sports Resort, MotionPlus for $169. That's $30 cheaper anywhere else and the lowest price for the new Wii bundle. [LogicBUY]

Logitech has a rare 25 percent off coupoon code on the new G series lineup:

• Logitech G700 Wireless Gaming Mouse for $74.99. Normally $100. [LogicBUY]

• Logitech G510 Gaming Keyboard for $89.99. Normally $120. [LogicBUY]

• Logitech G930 Wireless Gaming Headset for $119.99. Normally $160. [LogicBUY]

• Dell has 4000 Microsoft Points for $41. Next lowest price is $43 from Buy.com. [Slickdeals]

• Buy.com has Wii AirCharge Inductive Charger for $17. [Slickdeals]

• Dell Outlet has the Wii Remote with Motion Plus (black) for $27. Next lowest price is $43 from Walmart. [Slickdeals]

• Logitech has the Logitech MX 5500 Cordless Bluetooth Desktop Keyboard & Mouse Set (dented box) for $85. Next lowest price is $139 from Mwave. [Slickdeals]

Software

• Proof that writers aren't the only ones who get launch swag. Quick Hit NFL Football, the free-to-play, browser-based NFL simulation, is celebrating its league-licensed, 3D-presentation re-release by giving away Coaching Points, the game's XP used to rank up players on your team, for those who sign up with promo code QHKOTAKU. The code is good through Sept. 29.

• 2010 FIFA World Cup (Xbox 360, PS3 and Wii) is $33.99 at Gamestop [TechDealDigger]

• Dell has, for pre-order, Halo: Reach for $49.99 or you can grab it from Amazon for $60 with a $20 video games credit. [LogicBUY]

GameStop dropped the prices on the following games. Use coupon codes NEXT15 and SAVER to cut 15 percent with free shipping.

• Crackdown 2 (360) for $33.99. Normally $42. [LogicBUY]

• Borderlands (360) for $25.48. Normally $39. [LogicBUY]

• 3D Dot Game Heroes (PS3) for $25.49. [LogicBUY]

• Kane & Lynch 2: Dog Days (PS3, 360) for $42.49. Normally $50. [LogicBUY]

• Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands (Xbox 360) is $19.90 at GoGamer through Monday. Next best is $29. [Dealzon]

• Splinter Cell Conviction (Xbox 360) is $24.90 at GoGamer through Monday. Next best is $34. [Dealzon]

• Amazon has several pre-orders with a $20 game credit offer. Titles include Halo: Reach, Call of Duty: Black Ops, and Fable III. [Slickdeals]

• Amazon has Guitar Hero On Tour for DS (Bundle) for $10. Next lowest price is $20 from NothingButSoftware. [Slickdeals]

• Best Buy has BioShock 2 for PS3 or Xbox 360 for Reward Zone Members for $20. Next lowest price is $35 from Toys R Us. [Slickdeals]

• Best Buy has Just Cause 2 for PS3 or Xbox 360 for Reward Zone Members for $30. Next lowest price is $45 from Sam's Club. [Slickdeals]

• GameFly has Final Fantasy XIII (360/PS3) pre-owned for $20. [Slickdeals]

• GameFly has Silent Hill: Shattered Memories (Wii) pre-owned for $13. [Slickdeals]

• Amazon has Batman Arkham Asylum for PS3 for $30. Next lowest price is $ from . [Slickdeals]

• Sears has Fallout 3 Collector's Edition (PS3) for $31. Next lowest price is $55 from Amazon. [Slickdeals]

• GameFly has Madden NFL 10 (PS3) pre-owned for $10. [Slickdeals]

• Amazon has NBA 2K11 (Xbox 360 or PS3) + $10 Future Game Credit for $57. [Slickdeals]

• GamersGate has Mass Effect 2 Digital Download for $15. [Slickdeals]

• PlayStation Network has its 5-Year Anniversary Sale - Suikoden (PS1 Classic) for $3, Super Rub a Dub for $3.49. [Slickdeals]

• Steam has Left 4 Dead 2 for $20 or 4-pack for $60. [Slickdeals]

• GoGamer has Dirt 2 (I) PC for $8. [Slickdeals]

• Amazon has Crackdown 2 (Xbox 360) for $40. [Slickdeals]

• Best Buy has Borderlands Add-On Pack (Xbox 360) for $10. Next lowest price is $20 from Amazon. [Slickdeals]

• Amazon has Bayonetta (Xbox 360/PS3) for $20. [Slickdeals]

• Amazon has Supreme Commander 2 PC for $10 or Xbox 360 for $15. [Slickdeals]

Digital Distribution

This listing of the Top 25 digital download bargains, all for PC, grouped by distributor and ranked by savings, come courtesy of Deals4Downloads. You can see links to these and more at their roundup.

On Direct2Drive
1. King's Bounty: Armored Princess is $6.00, save 83 percent.
2. Fallen Earth: Blood Sports is $6.00, save 80 percent.
3. Crayon Physics Deluxe is $6.00, save 70 percent.
4. Disciples 2 Gold is $6.00, save 70 percent.
5. Frontlines: Fuel of War is $6.00, save 70 percent.
6. Sid Meier's Pirates! is $6.00, save 70 percent.
8. SWAT 4 is $6.00, save 60 percent.
9. Zombie Pirates is $6.00, save 60 percent.
10. Age of Conan: Hyborian Adventures is $9.95, save 50 percent.
17. Fort Zombie is $6.00, save 40 percent.

On Steam
7. Space Siege is $5.10, save 66 percent.
15. Secret of the Magic Crystals is $4.99, save 50 percent.
16. Football Manager 2010 is $9.99, save 50 percent.

From GameStop
11. Age of Conan: Rise of the Godslayer is $14.99, save 50 percent.

At GamersGate
12. Sylvenia - Fantasy Poker is $4.99, save 50 percent.
19. Tidalis is $6.99, save 30 percent.

On Impulse
13. Tropico 3 Absolute Power is $9.99, save 50 percent.
14. Tropico 3 is $14.99, save 50 percent.

At Good Old Games
18. Activision Strategies is $8.38, save 30 percent.

On Gamesplanet
20. Sid Meier's Civilization V is $46.20, save 25 percent.

Kotaku thanks our coupon partners for providing these and other great deals. Be sure to bookmark and search their Kotaku hashtags (#techdealdigger, #dealzon, #logicbuy, #deals4downloads, #slickdeals and #dealtaku) for updates throughout the week.

Further, to our friends across the pond and north of the border, check the #ukdeals and #canadadeals hashtags and be sure to flag any deals you might have with that.

As always, smart gamers can find values any day of the week, so if you've run across a deal, share it with us in the comments.