This xtreme!!! It may not induce a thirst for tossing back a Mountain Dew or inspire us to shred something, but the PlayStation Network release of Castle Crashers is not tame looking by any means.

The official Behemoth Development Blog sets up our first look at the new competitive mode coming to Castle Crashers—you know, eventually—which appears to take a casual stance toward standardized volleyball rules. So when is all this revamped PlayStation 3-flavored Castle Crashers fun coming? The Behemoth doesn't know, only saying that the PSN game is in its "final testing" stages.

Perhaps the wait will become more tolerable once the developer unveils its other new secret feature...

Castle Crashers PS3 Update!! [The Behemoth Development Blog]

In a heartfelt letter on his blog, Clint Hocking, the main man behind Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory and Far Cry 2, explained yesterday why he's leaving the studio he's worked at for a decade, Ubisoft Montreal.

The full letter to fans and peers is a must-read, but if you're short on time, here is part of creative director Hocking's powerful sign-off:

I am too comfortable. I am too content. And I know where that can lead for me.

Fortunately, for the first time in my life, I know the way forward. The way forward lies in my having the courage that I did not know I had a decade ago to bid farewell to those tragically comforting habits. I need to walk on hot coals and sleep on a bed of nails. I need to chew on broken glass. I need to drink paint. This post has gotten long enough and I am still afraid to come to the point, but what I really need more than anything is to write these words;

I gave notice of my resignation to Ubisoft on Monday, April 26th, 2010.

Hocking's most recent game, Far Cry 2, was released in the fall of 2008. He's had no announced projects since then. No word on what that work might have entailed nor what he will be doing next.

Read the whole letter at Hocking's blog:

451 Weeks [Click Nothing blog]

Video games have given the world joy, joysticks and Super Mario. They've been accused of worse. Let us hope they have not inspired TV series, like Lost, to end simplistically (thus, badly!), the way so many video games do.

In the interest of not spoiling ABC's Lost for those who are not caught up — and of not getting too specific for those who don't care — just recognize, please, that the hit show Lost ends its six-season run later this month. How it may end is a subject of popular debate, at least for the millions who watch the show weekly.

Lost has been about survival: What do people who've crashed on a seemingly deserted tropical island go on living?

Lost has been about mystery — maybe there are other people and mad science experiments and even noisy monsters on this island too?

But in Season 6, Lost may also be about one of the worst storytelling sinkholes: the march toward a boss battle.

No Andross In My Lost, Please

Just as there is in Super Mario Bros, in every Zelda game, in both Bioshocks, in the Final Fantasy adventures and so many more video games, there appears to be an ultimate bad guy in Lost. And, with just a few episodes remaining until the late-May finale, it's looking like the series may end with our hero or heroes fighting one big, tough bad guy.

This is worrisome.

(I'm not saying who Lost's final boss appears to be, since some of you only watch this show via DVD boxed sets and have yet to view it. How nice of me!)

Video games didn't invent the idea of an ultimate enemy or a nemesis. King Arthur battled Morgan le Fay; Robin Hood, the Sheriff of Nottingham. The Bible had the devil. The 20th century had Hitler.

Still, video games have been relying on the boss battle as the primary way to signal that their adventure is complete with scant exception. They present a final nemesis, the grim reaper of the little life they've allowed players to experience for 20, 30 or 40 hours. And they provide the chance to kick him into oblivion. An ultimate evil conquered, roll credits.

The fault of video games has not been their inclusion of ultimate bad guys, but their reliance on them. They are the default device to ending a video game adventure. To end a game without encountering one is still a modern surprise.

Video Game's Favorite Storytelling Folly

The acclaimed Bioshock, an adventure through the madness of a failed undersea utopia may sport a slower pace and appeal to the thinking man, but it ends with a fight against a chemically-empowered giant. Shadow of the Colossus is an emotional journey of a boy sent to hunt grand beasts. Climaxes with a boss battle. Star Fox is the video game equivalent of Top Gun. Each entry culminates with a boss battle. Grand Theft Autos don't end with boss battles, nor do Halos. But Metal Gears do. Resident Evils do. Prince of Persias. God of Wars. Gears of Wars. One recent game, full of suave and sophisticated action, climaxed with a boss battle: beat up the pope.

When you need to end dozens of hours of adventure, video games teach us, you do it with a boss battle.

Movies can get away with this. Compared to six-season-long TV series and 40-hour video games, they are short. Next to those baroque forms of entertainment, feature films are mere sonnets or songs, needing a final clever rhyme or a cymbal crash to end their brief run. Big-time video games and big-time TV series are a little closer to the length of life, and life ends, for most, with no boss battles. Neither do novels, whose creators know how to drift their story to completion if need be or at least just not bottleneck their portrayed evil into the shape of an ultimate man who must be shot three times and tossed to the moon.

For about four seasons, Lost did not appear to be destined for a video game ending. It had a shot of ending more like The Sopranos, with an abrupt exit, or mournfully without a heroically everyone-wins Star Wars end, a la The Wire. ABC's show seemed more likely to do those things than to identify its most evil element as a foe to be conquered, a most powerful enemy that would require, in video-game boss style, a specific plan and pattern executed by our heroes to overcome.

Should Lost end in such a way, with a boss battle, we can surely blame other influences than video games. But I won't be able to shake my fear that games did this. If Lost ends in the manner that so many games do, I will lament the nefarious influence of the medium that named the show's submarine (Galaga) and helped justify the inanity of pressing buttons mindlessly to possibly save the world (see all of Season 2).

I wish video games didn't end like video games as much as they do. I hope TV shows, Lost or otherwise, don't end like them either.

Over 1,600 Kotaku readers have shared their feedback with us via the 2010 Gawker Media Census. 70% of those who responded play at least 11 hours of video games per week—up from 60% last year. We admire your stick-to-it-ive-ness. Join the party—click through to submit your Census!

The Gawker Media Census 2010 is a way for us to find out about what you like and what you don't like about media, the Web, life in general, and Kotaku itself. Your feedback is essential to the site—not to mention good reading—and helps us make your Kotaku-perusing experience even more appealing than it already is.

So, commenters, click here to get started.

Everyone else, here's your Census.

Bonus! If you email the last question of the Census to surveys@gawker.com with "Gawker Media Census 2010" as the subject line, you will be entered to win a $300 AmEx gift card. (Winner will be chosen at random.) [Rules]

Thank you thank you thank you. You may now go back to your one true love.

You know what was missing from the original Hydro Thunder? That's right. Exploding barrels. Thankfully, developer Vector Unit has corrected that oversight in Hydro Thunder Hurricane, coming to Xbox Live Arcade.

The new developer taking the Hydro Thunder reins from Midway promises all-new ways to enjoy wet and wild speedboating action with a handful of new gameplay modes. In Ring Master, players must race through a series of rings as fast as humanly possible, with levels of difficulty ranging from novice to pro to expert. It's not only the best speedboat slalom racing you'll experience on Xbox Live Arcade, it's also a great way to discover hidden routes.

Also new is the Gauntlet time trial, which switches things up with a smattering of exploding barrels. Not only a great opportunity to enjoy the thrill of an exploding barrel, but a chance to test your Boost Jump skills.

Check out new screens of the XBLA game, then join me in rabidly anticipating its forthcoming release.

Street Fighter: Beginning's End is a fan film with amazing fight choreography, some tight special effects, better than normal Ken hair, and a terrifically bad sense of timing, releasing the same week as the Capcom-sanctioned Street Fighter Legacy.

Street Fighter: Beginning's End is the work of Los Angeles filmmaker Chris Cowan, whose Thousand Pounds Fight Team shot the entire short on a skimpy $400 budget, shooting it on a Canon EOS 7D and utilizing Final Cut Pro and Adobe After Effects for editing and special effects.

The premise is simple: Ryu is heading off to join the World Warrior tournament, and Ken asks for one last battle before they part ways. It's almost sweet, in a brotherly sort of way, even if Ken's wig nearly ruins everything.

It's really not a bad piece of filmmaking, especially when you take the budget into account. Hopefully it won't get lost in the hubbub surrounding Joey Ansah's Street Fighter Legacy.

At least Cowan is taking the bad timing in stride. "On a side note, it's amazingly random that two Street Fighter Fan Films get released within the same week (really only a few days apart). We had zero clue that the guys over at StreetLight Films were working on such a high caliber piece! When a buddy of mine linked me to it yesterday, I was completely shocked, yet so excited to see it. We definitely wish them the best of luck with their project. We're fans first and foremost! Nothing but respect for them and what they've been able to accomplish!"

Kotaku Talk Radio will be recording live from CBS Radio on Wednesday. 11am Kotaku Time. 1pm ET. 10am PT. Hosts: Crecente and me. Guest: Sid Meier. Call-in and live-streaming details will be on Kotaku at showtime. Join us!

The head of Hunted: The Demon's Forge developer, inXile Entertainment, doesn't take comparisons of his dark dungeon crawler to Gears of War unkindly—even if you're labeling it Spears of War and Gears of Warcraft.

inXile CEO Brian Fargo takes that as a compliment, but when showing us the latest version of Hunted: The Demon's Forge, he stressed that the dark medieval fantasy game is more than just cover and combat. Hunted, Fargo says, is a game about getting lost in its dungeon crawler world.

Fargo, who says he was heavily influenced by the original Wizardry and later went on to help create The Bard's Tale, Baldur's Gate and Fallout, wanted to focus more on his latest game's depth, puzzles and its non-critical path of an adventure.

Like our previous eyes-on time with Hunted: The Demon's Forge at this year's Game Developers Conference, the game's cooperative stars Caddoc and E'lara set off on a mysterious quest. It kicked off with the elfin ranger E'lara, still as minimally clothed as ever, letting curiosity get the best of her. After E'lara touches a cursed skull—which looked suspect to begin with—day turns to night, the earth begins to shake and the world starts to crumble around our heroes, who make haste through crumbling spires and walls to safety.

By safety, I mean re-animated undead. Caddoc and E'lara engaged in some of the "co-op at a distance" combat that we'd seen previously. Caddoc entered the fray with sword and shield, showing off a new shield bash skill, while E'lara fired arrows from a safer distance. The combat here was puzzle-like in its progress, as inXile's Matt Findley and Michael "Maxx" Kaufman took out dozens of rank and file skeletons, working their way through the horde to take out a higher ranking undead manning a ballista. E'lara then took control of the ballista herself, firing massive bolts into a pair of stone gargoyles that were ultimately responsible for reanimating the undead.

Hunted: The Demon's Forge's blend of combat and puzzle-solving cooperative play was better illustrated moments later, when Findley and Kaufman encountered one of the stony Magic Mouths that inhabit the game world. These rocky sculptures sometimes offer hints about how to progress, typically with cryptic riddles that explain less cryptic puzzles. In one case, Caddoc and E'lara simply need to light a series of braziers in the correct order—while also dealing with a new horde of skeletal warriors.

Perhaps the most interesting aspect of the demo was spent in a dark tunnel, lit only by a handful of torches. E'lara's flaming arrows, when shot down corridors, lighted the path and revealed hidden braziers the player could ignite. It was an intimidating series of stumbling in the dark, with more skeletons and giant beasts popping out of walls.

Here, we also saw some of Hunted: The Demon's Forge cooperative puzzles that required Caddoc's strength to complete. The player was tasked with pushing a switch, keeping it held, while E'lara crossed a trap-laden bridge to light a fire. As one might expect, the preoccupied Caddoc was of little help when yet another batch of bony demons went after our heroes.

Call it Spears of War if you prefer, but Hunted: The Demon's Forge showed more promise during our latest eyes-on demo, in part thanks to the clever cooperative play mechanics required for more than just hacking, slashing and shooting scores of hellspawn.

Hunted: The Demon's Forge is planned for a release not this year, but hopefully the next, on the PlayStation 3, Xbox 360 and PC.

Who the hell shoots and tosses grenades at their own team? Someone who wants to fail in the Halo Reach beta, that's who. Here's a few handy tips for folks who really want to suck.

What qualifies me to tell you how to suck at the Halo Reach beta? For starters, that's me in the screenshot above, having forgotten which color team I was fighting for on the first day of early beta. Reach beta players can even download a clip of me doing it online.

In my defense, I was very tired, but even more in my defense, I truly suck at Halo. Right now, as we speak, there's someone on my Xbox 360, speaking through Xbox Live, asking me if I am there. I have no idea how that happens, or who is trying to speak to me. Did I accidentally join a party? No clue!

So yes, I'm perfect for the job.

Now keep in mind that this isn't How to Be An Asshole In The Halo Reach Beta. This isn't stuff you should be doing on purpose. It should come naturally, like scurvy.

Tip One: Forget Which Color You Are Playing As
Friendly fire happens all the time in real life, and those guys have the benefit of being able to lower their chins to look at what they are wearing. We don't have that luxury in Halo Reach, at least not until we die. I'm honestly sorry the two folks in the picture above were on the receiving end of my misguided wrath, but I suck, and that's just what I do.

Should I apologize for who I am? I do, daily. Not just to people I know either. Random people on the street. "Sorry for who I am, Mr. Ice Cream Truck Driver!" I find it cathartic.

Tip Two: Ignore Those Other Weapons
They wouldn't issue you an assault rifle if they didn't think it was completely capable of getting the job done. Sure, guys seem to run at you head-on, completely ignoring the bullets ripping into their shields while multicolor flashes of light spew from the highly advanced alien weaponry they have at their disposal. They don't suck. That's their problem, not yours.

Besides, the assault rifle is perfect for...

Tip Three: Melee Everything and Everyone
Did you know there's a button that makes you hit people? I don't remember which one it is, but once you discover it, hit it all the time. It doesn't matter if your opponent (the red guy, or possibly the blue guy) is shooting rockets in your general direction, or on the other side of the map. He or she is just begging to be smacked.

If anyone gets close enough to you for this to work, remember to forget which button does it in the heat of the moment. If you're lucky, you might grenade yourself to death.

And if your opponent is too far away, there's always...

Tip Four: Use Your Armor Powers Constantly
You have a jetpack! Why are your feet on the ground? Because you think it makes you an easy target? Obviously you don't suck enough, and are probably in the wrong class. Halo Reach gives you special powers, and with special powers come special responsibilities to use them at every possible moment, whether you need to or not. Nothing astounds and delights your more able opponents than the sight of you popping in and out of visibility at regular intervals, or having to wait patiently off to the side to kill you while you play with your invulnerability shield dealie.

Tip Five: We Don't Need No Stinkin' Objectives
Bungie provides us "game types" filled with "objectives" as mere "guidelines" for how we could play, should we decide not to suck as much as we normally do and run out of "air quotes". You're here to kill people, not carry some flag to a glowing spot on the ground, or take out the enemy's generators. Just because everyone else is standing by the flag, looking all protective, that doesn't mean you shouldn't be on the other side of the map, engaged in fierce pitched battles against other players who have no idea what they're doing.

By following these five easy steps, you might one day find yourself flipping through your saved videos in the Halo Reach beta, wincing at all of the horrible things you've done wrong. Some people would rather relive their great triumphs, but we suck, so we take what we can get.

Besides, it's not like your mistakes are going to show up on the front page of a major gaming blog or anything.

Every month we here at Kotaku crunch some numbers and tell you which 10 Wii games get played the most, per gamer, on the Nintendo Wii. Today, we're doubling our efforts. This is the top 20, as of May 1.

Answers to frequently anticipated questions

1) No! This is not a list of the top-selling Wii games. This is a list of the games, according to public data distributed by Nintendo, that get played the most by people who have either rented or bought the game.

2) Yes! Those numbers you see are hours and minutes, tallied from the day the game launched. The average Smash Bros. owner is not playing 70-plus hours of the game each month. That would be unhealthy. They've logged those hours since they first got the game, be it launch day or otherwise.

3) See for yourself. Just click the chart to enlarge it.

Okay, now we have that out of the way.

I've loaded up the chart with 10 more games because the Top 10 had become dull. Not enough movement up there, aside from the recent rise of Harvest Moon: Animal Parade.

Plus, people are always asking where Mario Kart is or mocking Wii Sports for not being on the list. Those games will be mocked no longer!

Here's the Top 20. Let me know what you think of it. As a bonus, here are the actual play-time counts, as of May 1, 2010:

1. Super Smash Bros. Brawl - 75:36
2. Animal Crossing - 70:02
3. Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock - 57:19
4. Harvest Moon: Animal Parade - 51:53
5. Fire Emblem Radiant Dawn - 50:41
6. Call of Duty: World at War - 50:31
7. Harvest Moon Tree of Tanquility - 50:30
8. Rune Factory Frontier - 47:26
9. The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess - 47:06
10. Rock Band 2 - 46:51
11. Lego Star Wars - 45:08
12. Call of Duty: Modern Warfare: Reflex Edition - 41:33
13. Tales of Symphonia: DotNW – 40:01
14. WWE Smackdown vs Raw 2010 - 38:04
15. Wii Sports - 37:58
16. Mario Kart Wii - 37:49
17. Guitar Hero World Tour - 36:46
18. FIFA Soccer 09 All-Play - 36:05
19. WWE Smackdown vs. Raw 2009 - 34:38
20. Rock Band - 32:26

Where's all this from? (AKA an explanation of the above chart for stat junkies only): In a move somewhat surprising for the generally secretive company, Nintendo makes all of this data public. Any Wii owner can download the Nintendo Channel to their Wii and begin browsing for games. Any game that has been played enough times has usage stats listed for it, contributed by anyone who chose to share their data with the channel. The sample size that the channel tracks is pretty good, though it is obviously biased toward users who hook up a Wii to the Internet. We calculate that sample size by looking at Wii Sports usage numbers, which show that more than 104 million sessions of that game have been played by Nintendo Channel users as of April 1 (up 3 million in the last month), for an average of 30.00 sessions per player. That divides to around 3.5 million Wii Sports users whose gaming has been tracked by the channel. Since almost all Wii Sports owners in North America would be Wii users, we will venture that as many as 3.5 million people have contributed stats. That is up from the 3.4 million people when these numbers were run for April 1. (Please not that in the chart atop this post October 09 data is not included due to a problem with Nintendo's data reporting during that period.)