The Steam Box drama is now reaching soap-opera-esque levels. First, Xi3 announced that it’s partnered with Valve to birth a bouncing baby space grapefruit, then Valve noted that plenty of other prototypes are waiting in the wings, and now Gabe Newell’s emerged from the shadows to chat up Valve’s own Linux-powered, biometrically-controlled Steam Box. What’s next, I ask you? Will we discover that Half-Life 2: Episode 3 never died, but instead got shipwrecked on an island/overwrought metaphor/the moon, conveniently acquired amnesia, and came to believe that it, too, was a Steam Box? Or is some contrived, out-of-left-field twist going to reveal that our closest friends were Steam Boxes all along>? It’s just too much, everyone. I’m not sure if I can deal with it.

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John made me write that headline. And he was encouraged by Jim, who responded with an “arf”. RPS: the site that writes about the biggest things to happen in PC gaming with references to wee wee. And wee it is. Piston that is, the surprise announcement from PC makers Xi3 and Valve that they’re building a tiny, modular PC together. It was such a surprise that when Nathan wrote about it, all we knew was the name, the companies involved, and that the thing is small enough to be held in your hand. But I have more information and a video below. You’ll see just how small it is, and gasp as I did. It’s like the kitten of the PC world. (more…)

Hey everyone, you’re never going to believe this. The Steam Box? It’s totally real. I know, right? I mean, a series of totally unsubstantiated rumors from Valve alphabeard Gabe Newell was dubious at best, and Big Picture mode spent so much time in development for no reason whatsoever. But somehow – completely> unexpectedly – we’re now here, watching Valve and mini-PC maker Xi3 team up to reveal “an integrated system that exceeds the capabilities of leading game consoles, but can fit in the palm of your hand.” Xi3 also compared the device’s physical size to that of a grapefruit, meaning that this is yet another mind-blowing technological advancement I’ll have to worry about accidentally eating.

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Yes, that’s right. It’s that time of year again. If you’ve been a good girl or boy, then Santa Gabe will slip down your chimney and deposit some really rather decent prices for PC games. The Steam Holiday Sale has begun, with the usual shennanigans of voting for deals, daily offers, flash sales, and astonishingly cheap publisher packs.

Mirror’s Edge for £3.24, Arkham City for £4.99, every Valve game in one pack for an utterly mad £25… You know the deal.

And an odd Easter Egg in there – for utterly bemusing reasons we’ve still not been told, the entirely finished, already in multiple languages Scribblenauts Unlimited, is at 33% off with an EU release date of the 15th February next year. Bonkers.

The Valve shudders as gears lock into position, a thin jet of Steam erupts from the machine, scalding a penguin’s bum. My latest collection of poetry inspired by climate change, the guffaw-inducingly titled Global Warning>, is out in February. In other news, Valve have made the Steam For Linux beta available for everyone. Development news is found on the community site and the beta now supports 39 games, listed here. Even though I don’t use Linux myself, I have now decided that I’m giving it to everyone for Christmas.

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Crikey – Kotaku have just reported that The War Z has just been removed from Steam. There was word earlier today that Valve were looking into forum moderation issues regarding the game, but people were hopeful they’d dig somewhat deeper into the real issues that had been raised, regarding the apparent false advertising of features on its store page. Those have been changed since, but for whatever reason the game is now not available to purchase. It is listed instead as “Uninitialized”. If you already own it, however, your Steam copy will still run.

We’ve just received a statement from Valve about the game, explaining that it’s been removed because they consider it was issued prematurely, and they’re offering refunds to unhappy customers. You can read the statement below.

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Do you ever feel lost? As though each and every moment is just a blind struggle in some abyssal darkness? I know I do – especially when the power’s out or I forget how to open my eyes. But also, you know, metaphorically and stuff. And, as ever, in the game. Fortunately, Steam’s now offering a solution to one of those issues – and, given Valve’s unending quest to make its download/social network/movie-making/productivity software service do everything>, the others can’t be far behind. But yes, Steam Guides. They’re in beta, and – if you’re feeling so inclined – you can go make one of your very own right now.

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Do you fancy yourself a go-getter? Someone with big, earth-shaking ideas and the wide-eyed capacity to realize them? Well then, go save/destroy the world, you mad genius, you. But for everyone else, Valve’s now offering the opportunity to salvage your savaged entrepreneurial dreams. By selling hats, naturally. Yes, the real-money-based Steam Community Market‘s now open for business, and Team Fortress 2′s its all-too-willing test bed.

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Important post-weekend question. While speaking to Kotaku at the VGAs this weekend, did Gabe Newell:

A) Confirm that Half Life 3 will be a Wii U exclusive.

B) Reveal Valve’s plans to release a Steam Box that will replace desktop PCs entirely and force us all to sit on a couch for the rest of our lives.

C) Request ‘a little off the top’, mistakenly believing that he had walked into a particularly loud and very well-sponsored barber’s.

There’s only one way to find out – follow me down the Monday morning rabbit hole.

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It’s too late in the day for anything but an explanatory headline. I was going to go with ‘Steam Punk’ because ‘indie development = punk’ but then I realised that was utter nonsense so I decided not to. Here is the news, straight from the IGF organisers: “All IGF Main Competition finalists for this year’s event will receive the opportunity to accept a distribution agreement for Steam.” The IGF hasn’t made distribution agreements on behalf of developers though, with the final decision as to how the finalists reach the public still in the hands of the entrants. Instead, this route appears to be a means of avoiding arcane normal submission procedures or Greenlight.

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