Aug 17, 2023
The Elder Scrolls® Online - ZOS_Kevin
Learn more about loyal Stibbons, Lady Clarisse Laurent’s ever-faithful manservant and victim of a many great misfortunes.
My dear Lady Arabelle,
You ask an interesting question. Do I recommend a manservant to assist you in the everyday tasks that require the attention of noble women such as ourselves? I find that no simple answer springs quickly to my mind.
Now, having a manservant to catalog and care for my clothing, jewelry, and personal accessories is imperative. As is the help provided in dressing and styling my hair. Not to mention packing and unpacking for travel, preparing meals, and serving tea. But if you wind up with the wrong manservant, every day can feel like riding to Oblivion in an ox cart. Let me tell you about the trials and tribulations of my faithful manservant, Stibbons.
Don’t get me wrong. Stibbons is as loyal as a Dark Elf’s nix-hound, but he nevertheless drives me absolutely to thoughts of violence on frequent occasions. For example, he can be lazy and inattentive without constant supervision. He drinks too much. He has an unnatural fondness for your precious Investigator Vale fables. And he tends to always be underfoot, like a sad, little puppy.
As you know, my work takes me to many exotic locations and finds me in numerous adventures. I’m sure you’ve read about them. As much as I appreciate his efforts to assist me, more often than not he blunders into something that I must then extract him from. Should I list some cases in point? For completeness’s sake I think I must!
Whether helping me explore an ancient ruin, study a Daedric relic, or locate a lost treasure, Stibbons inevitably accidentally breaks something, activates a curse, or sets off a trap. I suppose better him than me, but I do wish he would be more careful. Stibbons has been possessed by a ghost, turned into a goblin, captured by a somewhat pretty Daedra, frozen in a block of ice, trapped in an Argonian egg, and multiplied into numerous copies of himself. And I won’t even mention the time he misread a scroll and got entangled in a spider’s web. I spend as much gold and time getting him out of trouble as he spends getting into it!
Still. Now, don’t spread this around, but I’d be lost without him. Stibbons knows exactly how to press my garments and brush my hair. He brews an excellent pot of tea and cooks up a wonderful fish stew. He also knows exactly where everything I need is located and can retrieve it for me relatively quickly when I call for it. He keeps all my research in order, which makes writing my reports and travelogues much easier to compose than you would think. Not that you know anything about getting ink stains out of satin, wink wink.
There is one other thing that I almost decided not to mention. I have come to care for Stibbons in my own way. I suppose you could say I’ve gotten used to having him around, faults and all. Maybe it’s because I know he needs me as much as I rely on him. Or perhaps it’s his most excellent foot rubs. They certainly do the trick after a long day trekking through ancient Dwemer cities and whatnot. If you say a word of this to Stibbons, I will deny it quite strenuously. And then I may be forced to mention that incident you told me about between you and Jorunn the Skald King. Or was it Rigurt the Brash? Nords. Who can tell them apart?
So after all that, I suppose I would recommend you find yourself a good manservant. Perhaps if you seek one with qualities exactly opposite of what I just described, you will be much happier.
As for your other question, certainly not. Stibbons’ contract is not for sale. Do not even jest about such a thing.
Most sincerely,
Lady Clarisse Laurent
If there’s hardship to be had in Tamriel, Stibbons has suffered it in his loyal service to his lady. Have you encountered Stibbons in your adventures? Let us know via Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.
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