The internet is probably full of information about this. Don’t you think?

Things are afoot in TeamFortress2Land, things of tease and mystery. Firstly there’s a new item: the golden wrench – a Midas weapon for the turning of people into gold – which internet boffins think might just be a clue as to the nature of the next update. But then there’s this TF2 comic, which tells a little tale of an engineer’s life, and unravels more of what seems to be an extra-complex history-explicating backstory for our favoured cartoonish shooter. All this seems ponderful enough… but wait! There are hidden links within the comic. On page four this, and then, within the source code of that page, a link to the obscured signature, here, and a portrait of the family, here. IT IS SOME KIND OF CLUE-BASED PUZZLE EVENT!

From the depths of the almighty Steamforums – via Simon Parkin, Via Kotaku – comes some fun reworking of Valves IP. One SF2-style is shown above, and an especially large shot multi-stage shot beneath the cut… but do follow the link to this venerable threadto see Fortcraft, The Legend of Sniper and more. (more…)

Valve! They’ve done it again! You’re going to like this comic about the launch of Fortified Team Two for Mac. You’re going to like it a lot. Unless you’re one of those people>.

Which people? I ain’t telling. This place has their curvy stink all over them.

(Is that the first time we’ve seen Saxton Hale interacting with our brave teamsters, incidentally?Tell me, nerds. TELL ME.)

Also! Also! There’s a new offline training mode, featuring bots! And anyone playing TF2 on Mac before Monday gets free in-game iPod headphones! And there’s a new video, including a glimpse of the Engineer with a scoped shotgun! I’ve put a picture of the latter, which is possibly teasing the long-awaited engie update, below. Froth away, frothers. (more…)

And I don’t mean games of The Road – that’s an entirely different kettle of misplaced licensing. I mean this: the road movie is a fruitful, interesting genre for film, and even TV, but what is it’s equivalent in gaming? Could it have one? Or are all linear games basically just that classic story-as-journey? Are shooters our road movies? Maybe, but perhaps there’s something in the nature of travel in videogames that makes it difficult to execute something authentically “road”. More essentially redundant thoughts below. (more…)

Valve has, without comment, released the video you’ll find below to announce Half-Life 2 for the Mac. To do so there’s brand new pre-rendered footage of Alyx, along with other Half-Life 2 familiars, which is clearly something that’s going to be worth a watch. It’s brief, it’s to promote a million year old game, but hey – it’s more HL2. Also, have they hidden any clues in there about anything else? It seems the sort of thing they’d do, and you seem the sort of person who’d be able to spot it.

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O frabjous day. For the first time in some three years, we’re treated to brand new words from the world’s second-favourite homicidal AI (SHODAN still has the edge, right?), Portal’s GLaDOS. Her lilting synth-tones narrate a lovely animated ad pimping yesterday’s free release of the original Portal, returning us to the heady days of Aperture Science motivational videos. That’s not at all. The deceased (OR IS SHE? (she isn’t)) robocrazy slips in a little tease for Portal 2 at the end, confirming that co-op play will be front and centre in the next round of physics-abusing adventures. Welcome back, missus. (more…)

If I had my way, Portal guns would appear in all other games. Far Cry 2, Dragon Age, World Of Goo, Freecell, the lot. And they’d appear in real life. Imagine how great things would be if I had my way. However, if the modding project of one Pawn from 3-PG manages to escape some awkward obstacles, we could soon be seeing a mod that allows the Portal gun in Team Fortress 2. Called, rather wonderfully, Team Portress, the video below explains how the gun works in game, first demonstrating what it’s capable of, then showing you the weapon in a proper game. The catch? According to the poster, Valve has recently introduced a ban on custom items being given to players to prevent the anarchic distribution of hats.

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It is Team Fortress news so we must post it because it is Team Fortress news, even in the face of our great despair about what the morrow may bring for the UK. Valve’s monopoly on patch-centric gossip remains extraordinary, the presentation alone ensuring gents like us are duty-bound to cover it. This time, it’s a teaser for the long-awaited Engineer update… (more…)

Dan Kelly alerts us to the (apparently) now fixed bug which slipped in with the last TF2 update, which allowed you to build as many sentries and dispensers as they choose. “There’s something very cool about watching 40 sentries simultainiously bleep and take down a heavy,” he notes. You can follow the chaos on the TF2 forum, with lots of people doing their own ludicrous, glorious, game-ruining gun spam. And some footage with Spose’s NSFW I’m Awesome as a soundtrack follows… (more…)