Welcome back to "Backhanded Box Quotes," a collection of measured, thoughtful criticism from the user reviews of Metacritic and elsewhere.

What are you dressing up as for Halloween? I'm going as Medal of Honor: Warfighter's Metacritic score. No, make that Sexy Metacritic Score for Medal of Honor. Because the real one is ugly enough to make a freight train take a dirt road. Some civilian critics didn't see it that way, though, so we begin with a couple of 10 scores given to it.

Medal of Honor: Warfighter

Released: Oct. 23

Critic: GameInterpretor (Metacritic)
• "Looking forward to DLC and even a sequel!"
Score: 10.

Critic: Drazat (Metacritic)
• "The graphics blow me away with there astounding browns and shades of brown there is more brown in this game than any game before it."
Score: 10.

OK, now back to the hating.

Critic: Hurricane 9 (Metacritic)
• "If there were not an EA logo plastered all over the place, you might think it were a F2P indie game."
Score: 3.

Holy shit, slamming both EA and indie devs? That is coldblooded and backhanded.

Critic: GamesMaster4Life (Amazon)
• "This game is not to be recommended to anyone,no matter how much you hate them."
Score: 1 star.

Critic: NinjaTwin (Metacritic)
• "Save your money and buy yourself a new shirt instead of wasting it on this rubbish."
Score: 0.

The Unfinished Swan

Released: Oct. 23

Critic: kasparov5 (Metacritic)
• "It is good but the graphics are lacking compared to modern fps games like Call of Duty."
Score: 5.

Hotline Miami

Released: Oct. 23

Critic: UnbiasedOne (Metacritic)
• "It would have been a hit in the year it's taking place in (1989) but for 2012, the eye strain, the aggravation and the urge to drive to the developers and beat them within two inches of their lives is not worth it, and $9.99 is defiantly not worth it. Again yet another pile of trash that will go straight to the top of the charts."
Score: 0.

Take note folks: No matter how much you insist on Hotline Miami being worth it, it will refuse. For it is defiantly not worth it.

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Jonatan Soderstrom, one of the duo behind the fantastic Hotline Miami, should be the last person on Earth giving advice to people pirating his games. So it's weird/nice to see him actually being one of the first.

On the game's thread at torrent site The Pirate Bay (and spotted by PC Gamer), Soderstrom has dropped in to address complaints—yes, pirates complain about the product they've stolen—and give advice for people on how to get the game running.

Hey there!

I'm Jonatan Soderstrom, me and my friend Dennis Wedin made this game. We're working on an update that hopefully will take care of any/all bugs, and we'll try to do some extra polish in the next few days. Would be great if you could update the torrent when the patch is out! It'd be great if people get to play it without any bugs popping up.

Hope everyone will enjoy the game!

For the "Error defining an external function." problem, try restarting your system and play again, it can pop up when your computer has been running for a while. We'll try to figure out if there's more to it than that.

While helping out pirates may seem a fairly counter-productive thing to engage in, seems that unlike someone who makes a six-figure salary, he can at least sympathise with the plight of the broke freeloader:

Hotline Miami dev endorses Pirate Bay torrent of his own game, provides helpful suggestions [PC Gamer]

Hopefully you are already hip to Hotline Miami, Cactus' unhinged, techno-drenched top-down murderfest. It's a wicked cool, incredibly fun game, and it sports one of the best soundtracks of the year. (If you're not aware of the game, you can read some of my impressions here.)

And now, can now listen to the entire soundtrack on Soundcloud:

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So. Hot. The best thing about Hotline Miami is how the music fits in with the game, the tension and release of every level, the way they each tie in with the accompanying tunes. But it's also just a killer set of tracks. I can't even deal with how much I love Jasper Byrne's "Miami."

Listen, and enjoy. And hey, pick up Hotline Miami! You won't be sorry.