Last week, I had the pleasure of attending San Francisco’s parody-Twitter-account-inspired Molyjam and pestering roughly a million developers with my inane questions. In between digging for such crucial details as the number of weapons in a game about invisible guns and whether there’d a happier DLC ending for a tale primarily focused on hurling oneself off a cliff, I watched countless off-the-wall ideas blossom into playable games. Truly amazing, however, was the amount of mileage different people – some of them not even professional game developers – got out of a single idea: romantic free-running. > (more…)
While the Flare Path Network’s minuscule viewing figures did seem to suggest the world wasn’t ready for a TV channel devoted to military gaming, philately, and Edwardian erotica, I still believe the rebranding and reorientation was a dreadful mistake. The accountants are far happier now we’re SHiT TV (Sharks, Hitler, and Titanic TV) but Frank, Becky, and the rest of the old guard go around with a look of defeat in their eyes that’s painful to behold. Sometimes I yearn for the days before FP diversified. The days when I could just sit down on a Friday morning and tap out stories about obscure sims and obscurer wargames. (more…)
In a classic case of me not noticing what’s right in front of me, it took me at least three minutes to realise that there were bees all over the Oddworld Hand of Odd logo on the new teaser site, encasing whatever the hell that thing is in delicious honeycomb. I’ve no idea what the game will be, but it’s from Just Add Water, who ported Oddworld: Stranger’s Wrath to the PC (and it ran like a flatulent donkey after a bowl of chili). The game did exist in a previous, albeit unreleased, form as an RTS on the PS2. We have footage of that below, via the documentarian device known as Youtube. (more…)
I never play MMOs enough to receive awards. Actually, I do play them, but don’t play>, so while everyone’s grinding and high-fiving over getting level quad-squlllion, I’m jumping up a mountain the wrong way, attempting to find a stray polygon to land on to climb higher and higher. It’s important research. So I’m physically shrugging at Bioware’s gift of 30 free days of game time to every SWTOR player that’s reached level 50. It doesn’t affect me in the slightest that my pioneering playstyle goes unrewarded. It might affect you, though, and for that I’m happy and seething with envy for you. It’s to drag everyone back into the game to experience the delights of the massive Legacy update. As an extra incentive, they’re throwing in a cute little baby Tauntaun.
Enough about the freebies. Here’s what the update looks like. (more…)
The unblinking internet eye of Engadget has spotted a new job placement ad at Valve, appealing for an electronics engineer. It reads: “For years, Valve has been all about writing software that provides great gameplay experiences. Now we’re developing hardware to enhance those experiences, and you can be a key part of making that happen. Join our highly motivated team that’s doing hardware design, prototyping, testing, and production across a wide range of platforms. We’re not talking about me-too mice and gamepads here – help us invent whole new gaming experiences.” Valve previously denied a “Steam Box” gaming platform, and the wording of this new ad suggests this might be something else entirely. But what? To the Speculatotron!> See below for some video-clues. (more…)
Generally, it’s pretty cringe-inducing to watch publishers get ahead of themselves. “Annual sequels, comic book tie-ins, and a movie deal that will pass across the desk of at least one noteworthy director before getting indefinitely shelved,” they excitedly proclaim. Then things inevitably don’t go as planned, and everyone has a good, long sob. I want> to believe Beamdog when it says Baldur’s Gate 3 is more than just a Kickstarter-fueled delusion of grandeur, though. And what’s this about Icewind Dale? I mean, what’s even left to be looted from Black Isle’s naked corpse? Planescape? Lionheart? OK, maybe we can just not> take Lionheart.
I think they should have had a go at explaining it in semaphore, but instead they’ve gone for the fashionable route of a glitzy video which shows off the space-time rip story that serves as a backdrop to Firefall’s territory-conquest alien-world crossover activities. Go take a look at that, below, and then at my preview, which is the most handsome preview you will read all day. (more…)
That is not, of course, to say that Risen 2: Dark Waters snatches away your hard-won victories or pits you against a giant, 20-story-tall physical manifestation of the public’s waning interest in pirates. Rather, the patch-eyed, peg-legged sea scoundrels have been known to use any means necessary to win a fight. Kicking below the belt, bringing guns to a swordfight, being Orlando Bloom, etc. But can such a varied arsenal stand up against seemingly unprovoked jaguar attacks? Risen 2′s latest dev diary aims to answer that burning question and many more. Also, it strongly hints at attack parrots, which is something I didn’t know I wanted until it turned out that I wanted it more than anything in this sad mortal world.
Oh to be a bullet. To exist in a momentary, frequently black-and-white world free of complications or petty concerns. Point A to point B. That’d be my entire lightning-quick existence, but I’d get to savor ever slow-mo second – probably while shouting “wheeeeeeeeeeeee!” Max Payne 3, at least, offers a glimpse into this hot leaden utopia, but at what cost>? Pretty much none, as it turns out. The gore-spattered kill cam, especially, looks like a barrel of kitten giggles – which is to say, it’s a mix between Fallout 3′s VATS meets Arkham City’s end-of-brawl slobber-knockers, except you have full control over speed. Those are the things I think of when kittens giggle. Is that weird? Anyway, the excruciatingly
painful wonderful trailer is after the break. (more…)
Farming Simulator 2011 is, on the face of it, not a very interesting game – but if you look deeper you’ll find that it’s actually very badly made too. It’s boring, even to those who resign themselves to tedium in advance, as pointless as a chocolate covered cat turd and built on physics so unnatural I genuinely suspect it to be haunted. So, you can imagine my excitement at sitting down to write a modding guide for it. Even after I’d grabbed ten of the weirdest mods I could find, from deployable crates to driveable corpses, it was still drearier than a car-load of wet Mondays and utterly unable to hold my attention. Eventually however, using one of the smaller mods I’d downloaded, I found a mission that imbued the game with much-needed purpose. The mod was called Bottle Finder. (more…)