Whilst playing this game, I realized that my oven was on. But, because of the loud ♥♥♥ soundtrack, I couldn't hear the roaring flames as my pot roast burnt to a crisp. Later, though, I was able to smell the burning pot roast, and safely take it out of the oven. After the pot roast had burnt, I gained a new sense of what the true meaning of life is. After my epiphany, I went out and bought a turtle named Sherman. Little did I know, Sherman was a talking turtle! He said that he could also grant me three wishes! I told him the only thing I wanted was a to see a beautiful wife. So, he gave me enough money to get into the local strip club. At the strip club, I met a girl named Sugar. Sugar and I fell in love after a lap dance she gave me. We, then, began dating. But, sadly, after our third date, I came home to Sherman dead on the floor. He overdosed on crystal meth! He was the only talking, magical turtle I had ever loved! And now, he was gone! So thanks, Rome: Total War, you burnt my Pot Roast, made me fall in love with a stripper, and made my heart break when Sherman died!
Публикувани: 28 декември 2013