Seriously, everything the protag needed to do could've been done in one day no problem, but you always gotta deal with ♥♥♥♥ at night when the god damn ♥♥♥♥ train rides straight into your olympic-sized ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. At one point, our hero Alan Wank gets ♥♥♥♥ing drunk (intentionally) and passes out when it's about to be daytime. Way to go, you ♥♥♥♥-in-a-box! Your ♥♥♥♥ing wife is getting tentacle ♥♥♥♥♥ by her own shadow and you're splurging all over some hillbilly's carpet. Oh yeah, and there was this great time when AW (yeah ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥) decides he needs to finish ♥♥♥♥ up on his own, so he tells his pals to sit tight in a conveniently locked bank vault while he goes to rescue his honey. But wait, you ♥♥♥♥-♥♥♥♥! You're 200 ♥♥♥♥ing miles from your destination (no joke) and you just locked up the only people willing to help your sorry ♥♥♥. Oops! Didn't plan on that one, did you Mr. Bestselling eat-my-♥♥♥♥ in America? So what do you do? Steal someone's car and drive ALL THE WAY THERE on a zomb-sorry, TAKEN-infested highway. Alone. By yourself. Instead of with friends to help you out. Great idea, ♥♥♥♥♥! Good job to you too, developers; you found a way to shove an extra two hours worth of content after the hero already said it was over. You guys should work for Bungie next you monkeys. Also, what happened to your writers? After some point, the protag becomes a ♥♥♥♥ing fugitive and you have to run from the police of all people. There's no explanation, you just ARE a fugitive now. Cops show up and start shooting you because someone forgot they weren't making GTA in the country.