For centuries Europe has been dominated by the church and nobility. On the shoulders of ordinary people the servants of god and the noble families justified their power and wealth. This was the incontrovertible, divine world order. A truly dark era… In the 14th Century the world order is beginning to transform itself.
User reviews:
Recent:
Very Positive (52 reviews) - 82% of the 52 user reviews in the last 30 days are positive.
Overall:
Very Positive (1,173 reviews) - 81% of the 1,173 user reviews for this game are positive.
Release Date: Jul 28, 2010

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Buy The Guild II: Renaissance

Stand-Alone version, The Guild II or any of its add-ons are not required to play this game.

Packages that include this game

Buy The Guild Collection

Includes 4 items: The Guild Gold Edition, The Guild II, The Guild II - Pirates of the European Seas, The Guild II Renaissance

 

About This Game

For centuries Europe has been dominated by the church and nobility. On the shoulders of ordinary people the servants of god and the noble families justified their power and wealth. This was the incontrovertible, divine world order. A truly dark era…
In the 14th Century the world order is beginning to transform itself. Due to trade and commerce an increasing middle class obtains more and more power and wealth. Entire towns purchase their freedom and more privileges from the nobility. Reading and writing is no longer the domain of the nobility and the clergy and the invention of printing information may eventually be spread everywhere. This is the beginning of the renaissance...

Features:

  • 8 completely new professions: mercenary, grave digger, stonemason, juggler, innkeeper, banker, miller and the fruit grower
  • New goods, buildings, ambient details and effects
  • All new scenarios ("Transylvania", "The Rhineland" and "The Alps") & bigger world maps
  • Improved AI, title and nobility system as well as new options (e.g. “God Measures”, levels of difficulty)

System Requirements

    Minimum:
    • OS: Windows® XP, Vista
    • Processor: 2 GHz Processor
    • Memory: 512 MB RAM
    • Graphics: DirectX9 capable graphics adapter with Pixelshader Model 1.1
    • DirectX®: DirectX 9.0
    • Hard Drive: 3.5 GB space free
    • Sound: DirectX 9.0 compatible sound card
    Recommended:
    • OS: Windows® XP, Vista
    • Processor: 2.8 GHz Processor or better
    • Memory: 1 GB RAM
    • Graphics: DirectX9 capable graphics adapter with Pixelshader Model 2
    • DirectX®: DirectX 9.0
    • Hard Drive: 3.5 GB space free
    • Sound: DirectX 9.0 compatible sound card
Customer reviews
Customer Review system updated! Learn more
Recent:
Very Positive (52 reviews)
Overall:
Very Positive (1,173 reviews)
Recently Posted
Sebbiezation^
36.9 hrs
Posted: August 25
A 58 year old catholic man working for the local church followed my 12 year old son around the entire city.



10/10 realism
Helpful? Yes No Funny
onnion
0.1 hrs
Posted: August 25
After few years of building my small patron empire, I had THE oppurtunity to take over my rival's only business, fully upgrade windmill. By throwing fire bombs at it until it, I guess, burned into submission. Lost a lot of good hired men, but I had crippled the enemy dynasty, which was nearly dead by now because of the plague that ravaged the city. But, as people tend to do, she told the city council and I was to be punished for my crimes. So I hid my kid away and while doing that my male character caught the Black Death. And by the time the hearing started he was on his death bed.
So my female character (whom I forgot to level up) went in and faced the charges. I was charged with: vandalism, robbery, theft, attacking a guard and tripple murder (her thugs did nit agree with me taking over her property, so I convicnced them with my sharp tong- I mean blade. And there was no way she would not win that trial. But seconds before the court asked me to tell my version of the story, I remembered -- I could raise my Charisma and Rhetoric. With Ch and R at 10/10 (IGN approves), I blew the judge away with my grabbing speech. Also, I found out that one of the guards was infected with plague and that both me and the executioner were freshly sick.
After my epic speech the court single-handedly said NOT GUILTY, and I was to choose proper punishment for my rival. I adviced 40 years in prison, which for a single childless woman meant the end of her dynasty. And jst for the fun of it I asked for 5k of gold. Got her in jail and got the gold, with my social status being better than ever before.
As the guards and the executioner took her out of the court room, my female character suddenly collapsed, died right there, because plague + age + stress = bad blood. And just like that, after my glorious triumph and mere seconds before my child reached the age he was considered adult (after each day the time fast forwards one or four years into the future), I lost it all -- because kids can't run The Guild, right?

Recommended: But of course! I still have to make it as the National Executioner, and so should you!
(About my playtime: I got this game from my local store and got the Steam version to save myself the trouble of looking for the DVD I somehow managed to lose; estimated playtime: 100+ hours)
Helpful? Yes No Funny
little_irishdude
28.3 hrs
Posted: August 25
This is a great game. Excellent economic and political sim that makes you really feel involved in your character and their family. A few bugs here and there but any game has them. The game runs a bit clanky at times, but if you have the patience to wait through the bugs and problems, and you SAVE OFTEN, it's endless hours of fun. As for mods, I havent even touched Fajeths mod pack yet, and I am still enjoying the game.

I only have one warning; Make sure you buy ONLY this game, and not The Guild Gold Edition or any of the other The Guild II versions. They are all standalones, not expansions, and Renaissance is the most updated with the final update coming in 2015. Dont waste your money on the bundle either, because this is most likely the only game you will play in the bundle. However, praise to the devs for working on a game so long after it's release.

All in all, give it a shot. The game really isnt that expensive and as far as simulators go, it is one of the best I have played in years.
Helpful? Yes No Funny
bschneider
21.7 hrs
Posted: August 25
This is one of my favourite games, yet I'd only recommend it on sale. As others have pointed out, the game is insanely buggy. These bugs aren't just cosmetic, minor issues, they can often be gamebreaking. Characters get stuck somewhere and have to be left for dead, saves get corrupted, multiplayer sessions go out of sync... the list goes on. If you do get the game, save often.

To provide some context for that situation, this game was not created by the developers of the original The Guild 2, yet they were forced to use much of the original code, which was a gigantic mess, and just as buggy - if not more broken - than Renaissance is. The "new" developers actually continued patching Renaissance on their own time, without pay. But of course, they can't re-write the code from the ground up, so the game is still incredibly messy.

When you get past the bugs though, you have one of the most ambitious games you could imagine in front of you. The game is eco-sim, RPG and dynasty manager in one. To start off, you pick between one of the four professions. You can either become a Patron to own farms and such, mostly creating food and other basic materials or running a tavern, become a Craftsman, who processes those basic materials and can gather some basic resources himself (like wood and metals), become a scholar, who either owns a church, brews certain concoctions or lends people money, or lastly, become a rogue, who comes into money by relieving other people of their own.

As you can tell that already opens up a lot of options. While doing that, you gain experience for anything you do, whether you work in your shop/mine/farm/etc. or pursue a love interest. Doing the latter will sooner or later lead to marriage and the foundation of your dynasty. Get funky and spawn lots of children who you should send to decent schools to start them off with more experience and once they reach adolescence, get them a decent apprenticeship to determine their profession. At this point, things open up a lot, because you can have three people in your party at once, which means you can effectively have three quarters of all buildings and jobs available to you, diversifying your income.

What do you earn the money for? Paying for education of your children, buying weapons and armour to fight duels (if you want to), upgrading your residence and workshops and most importantly: politics. By bribing your way into the local council, what stands in the way of you becoming mayor? Or eventually king? For that you will need to pay a lot of bribes and buy a lot of titles.

There's a lot of nuance and a lot of detail in this game, but as I mentioned, bugs can often stand in the way of those many options presented to you. I remember in one of the games I had (I think it was on version 4.20) the council was so ♥♥♥♥ed up that elections were basically a dice roll. If you think your game is ♥♥♥♥ing up, try the beta patches or if you're already doing that, try playing without them. Your experience may vary considerably depending on whether you use the betas or not.
Helpful? Yes No Funny
SwampBear
167.8 hrs
Posted: August 23
Good game. After getting the Legacy mod, it's a great game.
Helpful? Yes No Funny
Pancakebut
40.6 hrs
Posted: August 23
Be aware.
fkn Lag... 0% gpu usage, 10% APU usage, 50% and less cpu, and 5-30 fps spikes dips and freezes. ive been forum hunting for solutions and nothing. And running the beta patch .411* w.e. They put to many guards in the town. Its playable at first then, all the people and carts get going and the fps slow to crawl. Ive only played the maps with multipule towns tho...

This is more like a board game than a sim. I think realism when i think sim not fantasy land little kid stuff. It is fun. It seems like "The Sims" plays tho, i never played The Sims.

for the price... yea i guess its worth it but, i got all of them for like 5$ on sale
Helpful? Yes No Funny
chazz0715
7.4 hrs
Posted: August 23
Very fun buisness/social/family sim. I would prefer this then The Sims anyday.
Helpful? Yes No Funny
ONeil
8.9 hrs
Posted: August 23
Product received for free
I dont even know what I am doing never looked at a tutorial but I love it and am addicted.

Only gif better graphics xd 9/10
Helpful? Yes No Funny
AlterEgo45
2.2 hrs
Posted: August 23
This looks like a really good game. I can see the potential as a business and political sim.

Unfortunately if you alt-tab out of it for any reason the game, at least for me, pauses and won't let me unpause it. Apparently there are all sorts of annoying bugs - just look at the discussion board.

I'm on my way now to look at the other versions of The Guild because this really does look excellent if one of these games is bug-free. I just can't recommend this one based on all the bugs.

I respect that this is a very good game, but it plays like EA even though it isn't listed as such. I'm not a beta tester.
Helpful? Yes No Funny
tylergangordie1
20.3 hrs
Posted: August 22
9/10
All 8.5 hours are from the day I bought it. It cost $2.49 and it's well worth that price. I didn't have the bugs that others have complained about, and the interface is a little unorthodox, but for the sale price it was a steal.
Helpful? Yes No Funny
Most Helpful Reviews  In the past 30 days
11 of 12 people (92%) found this review helpful
4 people found this review funny
Recommended
64.8 hrs on record
Posted: July 31
I assassinated my way up to the highest ranks and killed all those who were against me. I then voted in my wife and son, giving me the ability to control the guard and clear me of all crimes through the power of the church.

10/10 would play again.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny
22 of 34 people (65%) found this review helpful
2 people found this review funny
Not Recommended
205.0 hrs on record
Posted: July 31
This review is for version 4.211

This was close to being a recommend in spite of the myriads of bugs and the overall clunky feel of the game. The concept is great and this game can be fun enough to overlook the amatuerish production of this game.

It is esentially a medeival business simulation that is all about dynasty building. There is a little bit of Sim stuff put in the game as well. You build your wealth by creating business and buying property which produces more wealth. You gain power and prestige by participating in a political system (run for office, support a war, throw a feast, etc). Have fueds with other dynasties and seek to eliminate the competition. There are duels for honor and court cases for justice. And watch your starting town turn into a viberant city and become the main hauncho.

There's a diverse choice of classes from the patron (food producers and service providers), craftsmen (construction materials and smithery services), scholars (who run the churches, banks, and alchemy shops), and rogues (who run the shadier operations). Within the classes are more diverse paths that could be taken that mostly deals with the kind of businesses you own.

There's a potential for countless hours of fun to be had enough to even forgive most of the bugs and the clunkiness of it if you are patient enough. That is until you run into problems with corrupt saves that will crash to desktop, meaning a lot of lost progress. I'm certain that it's due to improper exception handling in this game. The game will run into problems where exceptions are thrown and there are no instructions in how to handle those exceptions. In those cases, where the game does not know what to do, the game will simply shut down and Windows will close the game (so you "crash to destop"). There should've at the least been generic exception handling instructions that allowed the game to recover from any thrown exception not covered from whatever exception handling they did put in the game. Unfortunately, that doesn't seem to be the case, so saves eventually get corrupted with unrecoverable exceptions. This is really just evidence of the ineptness of the programming team that programmed this game and the insufficient coding behind the game. It gets to the point where it feel like it's not worth playing anymore. This is what is becomming the deal breaker for me.

It is this reason why I can't in good conscience recommend it. If you have a real hankering for a decent business simulation, and have a good deal of patience, this game is a good deal of fun. Save often and keep a liberal amount of backup saves, or you'll have a very frustrating experience. Otherwise, it may not be worth the frustration.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny
9 of 11 people (82%) found this review helpful
2 people found this review funny
Recommended
29.7 hrs on record
Posted: August 14
Fantastic! You setup businesses in a medieval city, work your way up the political ladder, weasel your way into the pants of a noble's daughter.

You can run all sorts of businesses, from a legitimate tavern to a brothel, from a farm to a smuggling and pickpocket ring. Ironmonger, achemy, even run your own church!
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny
2 of 2 people (100%) found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
Recommended
0.1 hrs on record
Posted: August 20
** This would be the perfect game if the bugs were fixed and the automation of production was more reliable. This is a great economic, criminal, clan warfare, sink or swim, castle building, cut throat game except the buggyness that plagues it. If any decent game production company acquired the rights to this game and made a sincere sequel, it would sell like hot cakes, it would be YUUUUUUUUGE. Make games great again! **
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny
1 of 1 people (100%) found this review helpful
Recommended
21.7 hrs on record
Posted: August 25
This is one of my favourite games, yet I'd only recommend it on sale. As others have pointed out, the game is insanely buggy. These bugs aren't just cosmetic, minor issues, they can often be gamebreaking. Characters get stuck somewhere and have to be left for dead, saves get corrupted, multiplayer sessions go out of sync... the list goes on. If you do get the game, save often.

To provide some context for that situation, this game was not created by the developers of the original The Guild 2, yet they were forced to use much of the original code, which was a gigantic mess, and just as buggy - if not more broken - than Renaissance is. The "new" developers actually continued patching Renaissance on their own time, without pay. But of course, they can't re-write the code from the ground up, so the game is still incredibly messy.

When you get past the bugs though, you have one of the most ambitious games you could imagine in front of you. The game is eco-sim, RPG and dynasty manager in one. To start off, you pick between one of the four professions. You can either become a Patron to own farms and such, mostly creating food and other basic materials or running a tavern, become a Craftsman, who processes those basic materials and can gather some basic resources himself (like wood and metals), become a scholar, who either owns a church, brews certain concoctions or lends people money, or lastly, become a rogue, who comes into money by relieving other people of their own.

As you can tell that already opens up a lot of options. While doing that, you gain experience for anything you do, whether you work in your shop/mine/farm/etc. or pursue a love interest. Doing the latter will sooner or later lead to marriage and the foundation of your dynasty. Get funky and spawn lots of children who you should send to decent schools to start them off with more experience and once they reach adolescence, get them a decent apprenticeship to determine their profession. At this point, things open up a lot, because you can have three people in your party at once, which means you can effectively have three quarters of all buildings and jobs available to you, diversifying your income.

What do you earn the money for? Paying for education of your children, buying weapons and armour to fight duels (if you want to), upgrading your residence and workshops and most importantly: politics. By bribing your way into the local council, what stands in the way of you becoming mayor? Or eventually king? For that you will need to pay a lot of bribes and buy a lot of titles.

There's a lot of nuance and a lot of detail in this game, but as I mentioned, bugs can often stand in the way of those many options presented to you. I remember in one of the games I had (I think it was on version 4.20) the council was so ♥♥♥♥ed up that elections were basically a dice roll. If you think your game is ♥♥♥♥ing up, try the beta patches or if you're already doing that, try playing without them. Your experience may vary considerably depending on whether you use the betas or not.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny
2 of 4 people (50%) found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
Recommended
119.8 hrs on record
Posted: August 16
awesome game. i highly recommend it. might have several bugs and glitches, but overall its a unique and fun game.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny
Most Helpful Reviews  Overall
812 of 834 people (97%) found this review helpful
287 people found this review funny
Recommended
36.9 hrs on record
Posted: October 8, 2015
Ignore the bad reviews if you think this game will interest you. Its not everyone's cup of tea. And on top of that, its severely buggy and largely unpolished. But if you look past all that roughness, there is a true gem in here. Not many games deliver so well on so much. It may be one of the best PC games I've ever played. Consider the following story as a testament to what kind of game this is:

I started out an innkeeper in a large city in a large region. I was doing okay. I kept selling cheap food and drink in order to open a bakery nearby. The bakery was also not much, mostly baking rolls for the masses. But in time I was doing well financially and took some time off to pursue a love interest.

The same year she was pregnant and gave birth to my first born son. I was busy working and she spent less time at the bakery. Soon all her time was spent between the house and the church. Neither of us minded though. My son was of school age and we couldn't afford much. So we sent him to a guild school to study to join the family business. The same year, my wife was pregnant again, but this time with a little girl.

During this time I was able to afford to be a citizen and was granted the ability to expand my business. I quickly set up an orchard and a farm outside the gates. It was hopeful, as the supplies for both the Inn and Bakery were now completely controlled by me.

By the time my daughter was of school age, we had the assets to send her to the best school possible. My first born son, was not the most amitious child and my first born daughter had a brighter future due to our new financial situation.

I had another daughter, and another son. More of the same, I suppose, as I was too busy working at the largely successful Inn and expanding my business to fisheries and livestock.

My first born son was a disappointment. He was born when we were poor and didn't amount to much. He mostly went to church with his mother and didn't have the skills to follow in the family business. My first born daughter on the other hand, had the right schooling and was perfectly set up to join the family business. My second daughter, while successful on her own terms, didn't match the success of the first daughter. And lastly, my last born child, a boy, was quiet and simply enjoyed school.

When my first born daughter came of age to help out, she did with much ambition. While I worked the Inn, she helped with apple picking and livestock. She was maybe a bit too ambitious as she managed the workers with the attitude of a tyrant. But I was happy with the success of my business and I was running out of room to expand, so I turned to politics.

I managed to win a low level office for a very short time before getting replaced by a man who had leprosy. However, my daughter almost entirely transitioned my business empire away from me and was doing quite well. So I kept at it. I had money to spend, so I intended to use it. I began bribing people for votes, and I managed to bribe the king himself. But, I lost again.

While my daughter ran my business, and I was unsuccessful at politics, I had little to do. So for the most part, I rekindled my relationship with my aging wife. Also, my character strangely had alcohol in his inventory often, and was no stranger to drinking it on the spot or offering it to others. On a strange night, I also tried sabotaging a rival bakery by tossing an explosive in the front door. It was a mistake and didn't do much.

While I declined from power and my daughter took over, I failed to notice my last born son. He graduated from university with a doctorate. He was a scholar and was a full grown man ready to open his own line of business. Upon his graduation, he quickly started a bank and hospital in town. He worked hard, but being the business man in the family, I saw issues. Two doors down from his bank was a rival bank. Around the corner from his hospital, was a rival hospital.

He was happy working and keeping to himself, so I took it upon myself. We bombed them and ran. I went home to my wife and all was fine. Except, it wasn't.

While I was at home with my wife, my son was working late at the hospital, and my daughter was working late night at the Inn, my daughter, unfortunately lead by her father's poor example, carried out a constant barrage of attacks across the entire city for hours. Many people died, including many of my loyal bodyguards, and several buildings were so heavily damaged they couldn't be entered for fear of collapse.

The tooltip read for me - Corrupt. My entire life I was a righteous man and in a single day I ruined a lifetime of good. My daughter however, was labeled a walking nightmare. A title she wore proudly as she was a violent and cruel woman.

A day later I was summoned to trial for my crimes. And shortly after, so was my daughter. Fortunately for me, the persecuter was bad at her job and couldn't articulate my crimes well enough. With experience, I was able to convince the judges that I was not guilty. My daughter - the judge didn't even show and she walked free.

I was done, however. And now my entire business was in the hand's of my daughter and son.

A few short years later my daughter married and had a series of daughters. My son married and had sons. She spent most of her time in the Inn, acting as an innocent server as she masterminded violence. Her first born daughter stayed at home with her father, picking up the skills for crafting.

My son on the other hand built up impressive charismatic skills and began spending most of his time preaching. He opened his own Catholic church and was busy speaking to the masses. He wasn't as interested in the hospital anymore due to issues obtaining supplies needed for medicine. That was, however, one of the catalysts for what happened next.

Illness spread across the city. It struck the elderly for the most part. And the political stage was swept clean.

My son saw this as an opportunity to win an easy election and do some good for the city. So he applied for a entry level political office.

My first born daughter's daughter was also of age and opened up a tailoring shop. She worked in it night and day and was militant, like her evil mother. However, she just enjoyed working hard. She committed no crimes and often gave bonuses to her employees to reward them for putting up with her management style.

My son had only one opponent to beat for political office. But to help seal the deal, his sister showed up and gave some bribe money to the king. He won the vote and was now holding political office. First it was the Leasing Officer. Then it was the Guild Master. Then Bishop. Then he used his political power to help his sister and neice also win politcal offices.

He had charisma and the power of the people behind him. His sister was a brute with deep pockets. She kept helping him win and in return, he would give her his vote when she applied. Together, they made it to the top - Cardinal, Soverign, and my grandaughter was Consul. Together, they took down bandits, banished rivals, carried out crime and government authority hand in hand. All while I watched from my estate. My children took over the city both economically and politcally. All while in my lifetime. Not sure if I'm proud or scared.

If you made it this far, kudos for reading.

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226 of 233 people (97%) found this review helpful
15 people found this review funny
Recommended
362.7 hrs on record
Posted: June 21, 2015
Okay, if you're interested in this game BUY THIS VERSION

DO NOT BUY the base game, DO NOT BUY Pirates of the "Yer a pee'in seas",( LOL ) it won't matter this version works with out the "base game" because THEY ARE NOT EXPANSIONS they are all "base games" of the same game only this one is the BEST.

I made the mistake of first buying the first guild 2 THE "base game". And then later buying Pirates, because i thought it was an expansion :l NOW i have 3 versions of the same game in my library }:[ Don't make the same mistake, just buy this version and be done with it.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny
206 of 210 people (98%) found this review helpful
Recommended
201.3 hrs on record
Posted: December 21, 2013
UPDATED ON APRIL 2, 2016: I promised to come back to this review after playing the latest official patch more, and I can report that bugs still persist. Having said that, it is still a big improvement over the last vanilla version, and I can also recommend either Fajeth or McCoy's mods to make the game even more playable. Both do different things, but both are fantastic. It is my recommendation that you try both (separately - mods generally can't work together in TG2) and definitely use one of them, especially once you've played vanilla for 50 hours or so to get a grasp for the basics of the game.

Onto the review: I will not belabor the point: The Guild is my favorite game. In this review I’ll try to explain why this is, and where I’m coming from in terms of my interest in the game, and probably games generally speaking. Hopefully this will help introduce like-minded gamers to The Guild and perhaps also steer some people, if they have different tastes, from the game.

I have always enjoyed simulation games, particularly economic and life sims. I grew up playing what now seem like fairly simplistic sims (e.g., Theme Park, The Settlers, and The Sims) and was fascinated by the seemingly living world of the AI inhabitants in these games. As I began to enjoy role playing games more, and in particularly Ultima Online, I longed for a simulation game in which I wasn’t in complete control, but instead could actually be one of those small inhabitants in the simulated world. Nothing like this existed until I played the first Guild game (Europa 1400) and I was immediately won over, realizing that it was as close to a perfect game as I would ever find, short of developing one myself.

The Guild is indeed a simulated world. It doesn’t attempt to be huge like Skyrim. You are controlling a small family in a single town or on some maps a single town out of up to four. There are up to eleven other “dynasties” (i.e. families) living in these towns, and they all go about their business without your intervention. You are not god in this game – you are just a family existing and striving in the middle ages, and it is amazing fun. It seems there is not one area that The Guild has left out of its gameplay. You can get involved in politics, your character has a religiosity meter, favor (or disfavor) with every single sim in the game, a disposition based on their criminality or lack thereof, skills, perks (think fallout), marriage, children, trials, duals, and the list goes on.

The world in The Guild feels more alive than any game I have played. NPCs go about their business with a real purpose, and it is all simulated. They will do everything from sit around town and chat, go to the pub, hire a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, to run for office and command the city guard (who, by the way, are also governed by some degree of AI logic). In short, the game feels a lot like living in a real, functioning medieval town.

In summary, if you’ve always enjoyed god games, economic sims, and life sims, but wanted to be part of the world rather than the controller of the world – wanted to have to work within the confines of human ability to influence the world (e.g., become mayor and change the law instead of using a hand in the sky to smite someone) then this is the game for you. If you want complete control over the world and all of its inhabitants then you might not enjoy this as much, but I still say it’s worth a try.
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417 of 490 people (85%) found this review helpful
542 people found this review funny
Recommended
68.5 hrs on record
Posted: May 29, 2015
In 1400 A.D. I was no one
In 1401 A.D. I was a low office holder
In 1402 A.D. I got married
In 1403 A.D. I got a child (thank god a boy)
In 1404 A.D. Life was good
In 1405 A.D. I build a mine
In 1406 A.D. I was rich
In 1407 A.D. My wife got kidnapped
In 1408 A.D. I killed the kidnapper
in 1409 A.D. My wife bore a girl, so I killed her
In 1410 A.D. I got sued for killing my wife
In 1411 A.D. In court everyone started talking German
In 1412 A.D. I got frustrated and killed those who spoke German
In 1413 A.D. I was no more

Best 7 hours of my life.
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