this game, well its not even a game to begin with
you start as a goat in god mode with no objective whatsoever
all you do is walk around, sightseeing every ordinary human npc in the game enjoying their peaceful daily life
then all of sudden your satanic nature took over because you felt like a f'kin OUTCAST!
what happened next is a sh'tshow

This is strictly a VANDALISM SIMULATOR
for psychopatic kids who had a really bad childhood and want nothing but terror for every other person around him
you play as a goat that cannot die and you can hurt everyone however you want without repercussion
you hear them SCREAM! and SCREAM! and SCREAM! as you work your ART!
there is no justice or law to judge you in the game
there is no boundaries
no objectives
no story
no relationship
no love

just utter VANDALISM, CHAOS and DESTRUCTION !
I do not recommend this game to anyone
this game is the direct path to Satanism
when you play the game, its constantly playing trick with your mind
you wont realize it, until you know it, the goat image which is a manifestation of Satan himself will take control over your mind.
and it will ruin your life
your last remaining relationship with anyone in this world will be torn apart
you will be his PAWN!
FUN FACT: Do you know that 90% of the world's terrorist had played Goat Simulator before?

Typical "pewdiepie played it, it's gotta be fun" game. Its fun for about 2 hours. This game is really not worth the 15 AUD i payed for it. I couldve gone and got 3 cheese pizzas for this price. I couldve bought Fallout: New Vegas for this price. I couldve bought my girfriend a nice scarf for this price. Honestly, having this game in my library is humiliating.

GOATS!!!!

Played it during the free weekend. Mindless enjoyment for a few minutes, but be warned spending money on this will lead to d!ck cancer.

Goat Simulator. Two words I never quite believed I'd be typing in one sentence, and yet here it is. This stands as what I think is probably the strangest thing to attain cult success over the past couple years, because on paper, this is something that really should never have succeeded. Yet despite that, this is a prime example of giving people something they never thought they wanted.

Having had some time during its free weekend, I was able to try out the game, and this is what I think of it.


One doesn't simply find any real complexity in how this game presents itself: you play as a goat, and do goat-like things. Naturally, that isn't all that's there, but it acts as the basic frame for strange and off-the-wall antics. This game knows what it is, and wears its identity on its sleeves, before their physics wonks out and they soar out of the skybox. It's ludicrous open-ended gameplay meshed with some decent satire alongside a few fun and clever distractions everywhere you look.

The humor can be make-or-break to some, so it's important to say that you're not going to be finding any 'high-class' humor, I guess you could call it. It's very punny humor, with a lot of referencial content, and there's nothing really wrong with that if that's what you're looking for. But if it's not, tentative steps around this game.


Who knew it took so much computer power to render a virtual goat? Regardless, the game will run on most modern-day potatos, but it's best to have a good computer rig before trying this game on any higher settings. As I would recommend before any purchase, always check the minimum system requirements; even if it sometimes doesn't help, looking at you Black Ops III...


Plucked from your mother and father goat at a young age, you grew up in the quiet town of GoatVille. Silently scheming, you finally took matters into your own horns to enact your revenge against anything and everything that gets in your way. It's a tale of action, romance, drama, and...yeah, I'm ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥tting you right now.

No, but seriously. Nothing's explained, not like anything needs to be explained here. If you're anything like me, though, it's fun to make up a story of your own as you go along.


Hooo boy. As the one thing really worth describing, this'll be the meat of the review. You can do a lot of simple and advanced stuff: heatbutting or kicking objects, licking things to carry with you, and even wall run and do manuals. All these mechanics grant you the unlimited power to ruin everything around you in a maelstrom of flying debris and bad physics.

Of course, the bad physics are a bit of a staple. Likely the reason you'll have surely seen GIFs upon GIFs of players spiraling through the air as unmajestically as virtually possible. It's no secret that the physics engine to this game is atrocious, but deliberately so. Whether that is a deal-breaker depends on what you want out of the games you play.

Goat Sim is a sandbox through-and-through, so there isn't any ultimate goal in mind unless you plan to go for every achievement in the game (To which I say, good luck to you, you madman.) However, you do get a list of tasks for every map you play on, where you can learn new mechanics, partake in some silly sidestuff, or even unlock special mutators.

Speaking of, Mutators allow you to alter how your goat acts and interacts with the world. Some may be given to you immediately, while others are unlocked through finding secrets or completing tasks and achievements. Each Mutator has a different effect, be it altering what your 'goat' may look like, or giving them special abilities, like summoning other goats, or creating impromptu dance parties. They can also be mixed and matched for...varied results, more often than not.

And, as I mentioned earlier, there are plenty of secrets to be found. Be it breaking into an MMO server room while inside the MMO itself, crashing into a DEADMAU5 party uninvited, or throwing a certain small person into a volcano, you'll find there are a lot of funny easter eggs hidden about for you to find. If you're a genuine, grade-A achievement junkie, you'll have your work cut out for you over the course of your playtime.


I can't talk much about these, but I can mention that the DLC expansions to this game can be varied in content, but otherwise worth the price value. Only one currently comes free with the game, Goat MMO Simulator, which takes some rather hilarious jabs at MMO tropes if I do say so myself. Other DLC come at rather low price points, and they, too, add new mechanics into the mix unique to each expansion. And, naturally, they're all filled with their own jokey easter eggs and secrets to be found, including getting into trouble a certain group of heisting criminals we all know.


In a nutshell, this is a game that does, in my own opinion, a pretty good justice to satirizing simulations, in that it's a simulation of a goat, but more beyond that. And it never forgets that it's supposed to be fun as well, which is why I'm glad to say that there's quite a lot of meat on the bones of what people would call nothing more than a gag-gift. Which honestly feels a bit disingenuous; there's some genuine fun to be had with this title if it's what you're looking for. Just know that, in being a sandbox, you're usually left to make your own fun; this can be a problem for some people, and may turn you off this game altogether if you're anything like that.

In total, 54 achievements, 10 total hours of playtime (1 of it being ♥♥♥♥ing ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Flappy ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Goat,) about 90-some-odd people launched into the stratosphere, and 128 'Baas' later, I can safely say that I had a lot of fun with this for what time I tried it. It's a good, short time-waster if you're looking for a quick laugh, and a satisfying, albeit annoying, challenge for those hunting for achievements.

I like playing as the strong Goat that likes to troll everyone by headbutting them in the butt, I also like how it has good humor. I find this game "unique" because of its humor and all of its neat looking DLC's, aswell this was my first game on steam back in early 2014. Thats why I posted a positive review, and we can't forget about the awesome mutators ;).

Got it for free. Found I am Bread reference. Fairly good.

fun and chill game

Short, Boring game with one bad joke repeating over and over.

crash everytime at loading screen for payday dlc.. why...