If you like fast-paced, randomly generated rogue-likes, then this is the perfect game for you. Nuclear Throne is another great game by one of my favorite developers, Vlambeer. You're a mutant stuck in the wasteland with all of your friends, and you've all heard the tale of the Nuclear Throne. Some think it's a bunch of baloney, others think that it really exists, and a few mutants are going to go out of their way to get to it. You are one of those few mutants. One of those few mutants, who is also really well balanced with the other mutants in terms of power.
NOTE: If the character's name has a star (*) next to it in the list, then it means it's one of my favorites.
FISH*: Once a police officer, now turned into a scaly fish-man on the last day before his retirement. He gets more ammo from all sources of the stuff, and can roll out of danger.
CRYSTAL: A good mutant for the new players, Crystal gets more HP and can shield herself to block almost all attacks. After all, "Crystal can handle this."
EYES: He has a deep backstory, according to the devs, but he doesn't have a mouth to speak about it. He can see much clearer in the dark levels like the Sewers, and he can use telekinesis to drag enemies towards him and projectiles away from him.
MELTING*: The wind hurts. Everything hurts. Melting is tired. Melting starts out with 2 HP (keep in mind, most projectiles do 3 damage), but to balance that out, he gets more radiation (in other words, experience), and can blow up corpses for immense damage potential. You should really get acquainted with the game before you try him out!
PLANT: He's extra fast, and can also trap enemies with vine snares. KILL KILL KILL.
YUNG VENUZ*: Ladies and gentlemen, the one and only Gun God! He has a faster rate of fire, as well as being able to fire two shots at once (with double the reload time, of course). Also, he doesn't even die. Whenever you reach 0 HP, he just gets frustrated with himself and goes home to his mansion.
STEROIDS*: He was the only human who came prepared. He predicted the apocalypse and pumped himself full of steroids to survive. Every weapon he holds is fully automatic and he can dual-wield, but he has less accuracy to compensate.
ROBOT: An automaton straight from the future. He finds better weapons earlier, and can eat guns if he doesn't like 'em (robots can digest anything, according to the game).
CHICKEN: A samurai chicken. Enough said. She's another good mutant to start with (yes, SHE), as she starts out with her good ol' sword and can slow down time! If her health reaches zero, she simply becomes beheaded and you will need to collect a medkit within 3 seconds! During this time, the screen does not move and you can kill everything you'd like to. Upon getting a medkit, you'll have 1 less max HP, and lost max HP can be restored with the mutation "Last Wish" or by getting a big medkit.
REBEL*: A bandit who detached from the group, she's found home around the campfire of mutants. She's probably the most fun to play as if you can get her late game. She heals when she goes through portals, and she can spawn allies to help her.
ROGUE: Similar to Rebel, Rogue is a cop that, as her name says, went rogue and left the Interdimensional Police Department (I.D.P.D). As a result, she is constantly being hunted throughout the adventure by the po-po. To combat them, she comes equipped with a weapon she stole after leaving, the Portal Strike, which has potential for immense damage.
[DATA REDACTED]: A living blob of [DATA REDACTED], [DATA REDACTED] can fire a beam of [DATA REDACTED] to kill stuff. He also gets an extra [DATA REDACTED] to choose from. He's a secret!
-Replayability is off the charts!
-Graphics, gameplay, and music are all really enjoyable.
-Good variety of... everything!
-Nice team of developers.
-RNG can screw you over, and does so way too often.
-May be a bit too fast-paced for most people.
If you're a fan of rogue-likes, buy this game. Go. Buy it.
Don't keep staring at this review.
Shove your wallet in to the computer.